


Take Me To Church

by dboys



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Homophobia, Homophobic Language, M/M, au: in america
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-07
Updated: 2015-04-07
Packaged: 2018-03-21 18:52:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 43,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3702383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dboys/pseuds/dboys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The thing about having a crush on someone right when you meet, is that you want to start the relationship right away. It’s straight to flirting, rather than “hi what do you like?” it’s “hi, what can we do together?” Craving their attention like no other, wanting you to be their only focus.</p><p>or</p><p>In which Oikawa is kept away from society by his conservative catholic parents and Iwaizumi comes to his rescue.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take Me To Church

**Author's Note:**

> Originally I was going to name it "For the bible tells me so" but then i was listening to music as i wrote and take me to church came on and i was like !!!  
> shoutout to [Maegan](http://hollikyo.tumblr.com) who discussed iwaoi headcanon's with me therefore helping me figure out a lot of the story
> 
> Also shoutout to my friend Mollie for beta-ing the first part (no social media for her ;n;)
> 
> the last part isn't exactly edited so if you see something feel free to point it out, especially if it's weird formatting bc frankly ao3 doesn't like it when you upload hella long things
> 
> Anyways, enjoy c:

“Mom, I don’t see why we’re doing this.” Hajime said as he started unpacking boxes.

His mother sighed and put her hands on her hips. “I think you do. We don’t need another ‘accident’ happening.” There was a bit of an angry tone in her voice.

“I made a _mistake_ , okay? I know what I did was wrong. Are you going to hold it against me forever?” He dropped what he was doing and turned to face her.

She met his eyes with a piercing glare. “And how many more mistakes are going to happen? Because that certainly wasn’t the first time.” His mother let out a dry laugh as she turned to unpack a box.

At that moment Hajime wanted to smack his mother, not that he ever would. She just gave him so much shit. Sure, he wasn’t the best son out there, especially to a single mother, but he was trying.

Or more that he made an attempt to try and failed.

He was kicked out of his old school and finally his mother had had enough and moved them from up north to way down south. And amazing enough, she was able to be transferred there too.

“I just…” Hajime started but concluded that his efforts would not help his cause.

So he just shut his mouth and kept unpacking.

-

-

On Sunday morning at 8:30am there was a knock (more like a bang) at his door. Hajime looked at the clock and moaned.

 _Why are you waking me up at this ungodly hour, on a Sunday, too._ He thought as he got out of bed to open his door.

He found his mother dressed nicely, entirely different from what she would ever wear.

“Hajime,” She said with a smile. “Come on, sweetie, get dressed. We’re going to be late for church.”

Hajime raised his eyebrows in confusion. “Oh hell no.” Was his immediate response. He went to slam the door shut but his mother beat him too it and stuck her foot in the doorframe.

“You are going whether you like it or not!” She yelled. Which of course, Hajime knew he would lose and trudged to his dresser to change.

When he had finished he made his way downstairs to find his mother sitting at the table with a cup of coffee in hand. She rose from her feet when Hajime was fully presented.

“Alright, let’s go.” And just like that, that fake smile was on her face again.

The car ride was awkwardly silent, like usual. Except this time Hajime had so many things he wanted to say that he couldn’t choose what to say first.

“I heard this church was beautiful.” His mother was trying to make conversation.

She was probably expecting Hajime to nod or say something positive back, but instead, “I don’t understand why you’re making me go to church of all things. You never made me go before, so why now?” He said louder than needed.

His mother’s grip tightened on the steering wheel. “I want a fresh start, Hajime.  We’re starting our lives over, no one knows us here so we get to make a new impression.” She said back calmly.

Hajime’s mother was obsessed with image, a good one to be specific, which was kind of hard to obtain when your son is a fucked up piece of trash.

“Bullshit,” Hajime retorted. “I don’t give a fuck about this kind of crap, I never will, stop trying to change me.”

His mother slammed on the breaks and turned to glare at him. “I _know_ you don’t care, I just,” Her eyes started to water. “I just wanted us to be in a position where we could be together and not yell at each other. You don’t have to do it for yourself but at least do it for me, try. You need to start _trying,_ Hajime.”

Hajime knew she was just guilt tripping him, but it worked anyways. He bit his lip and slouched in the car seat, suddenly becoming interested in the string that was coming off his shirt sleeve.

The rest of the car ride was silent and Hajime decided he really might start to make an effort. He wasn’t a fan of his mother, but he knew he put her through so much shit, so going to church was nothing compared to what he had done.

They found seats and Hajime sat down. As to be expected, his mother scurried off to go mingle with some of the others who had arrived early.

Hajime sat, staring at the ceiling as he sighed.

He really was a piece of shit and he knew that. Of course he wanted to change for himself. If his mother thought Hajime was happy with the person he had become, then that’d be a straight up lie. The problem was, he didn’t know what he could do to change. He wanted to change himself but it’s not as easy as it sounds.

Hajime must have fallen asleep because before he knew it, his mother was shaking him awake. He woke up startled and stood like his mother signaled him to as the service started and a song book was being shoved into his hands.

Hajime hadn’t been paying attention to the service whatsoever, but the people were another story. It’s hilarious to see what people do when they think others aren’t looking, not to mention how passionate some people got when there was another song to be sung or a response to be said. Luckily for him, no one had realized he was staring so there was no awkward eye contact.

Well, until he came across a guy about his age.

He stared longer than he thought was humanly possible, there was quite a distance in between them but that didn’t stop Hajime from thinking he was the prettiest guy he had ever seen.

Eventually the guy met his eyes and smiled a large genuine smile and Hajime could feel himself blushing. He didn’t even smile back, he just turned his head so he didn’t keep staring.

After the service ended, Hajime decided he wanted to find this guy who he found to blatantly attractive. Yet when Hajime headed off in the direction he thought the guy went, he didn’t find him. And after a few minutes he still hadn’t shown up which left Hajime in defeat and he sulked back to find his mother who was, unsurprisingly, talking to other people.

-

-

“I signed you up for youth group, they meet on Wednesday nights at seven.” His mother said as they walked in the door.

“ _What?_ Church wasn’t enough?” Hajime retorted.

His mother sighed and set her keys on the kitchen table. “I want you to make friends, Hajime.”

Groaning, Hajime leaned against the wall. “Isn’t that what school’s for?”

“Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to sit with your friends during church? Anyways, I was talking to the advisor and she said there were so many great kids and it’s fun too.” She smiled to herself.

“ _Whatever._ ” Hajime muttered as he made his way to the stairs.

“What was that?” He heard his mother call after him.

“Nothing.”

-

-

Monday afternoon when Hajime got home from school, he ran in with wonderful news. “Mom!” He called.

Hajime heard her respond that she was in her study and he made his way.

As soon as he was in the room his mother started talking. “You’re usually not this happy, what’s the occasion.”

“Volleyball tryouts are on Wednesday night so I can’t go to youth group, sorry, bye.” He said rushed so he could get out of there as quick as possible so he wouldn’t have to hear what his mother had to stay.

After a few hours, Hajime was called for dinner and he went down to the kitchen.

When they both had their food on their plates his mother said a prayer to herself while Hajime just started eating.

After about a minute he looked up to see his mother looking at him, her food untouched. “Did you need something?” He asked.

She pursed her lips. “You can skip out on Wednesday, but after that I want you going.”

Hajime sighed. “Whatever you say.”

And they both continued eating.

-

-

The week flew by. It was hard to believe, but he didn’t mind his new school. Since volleyball tryouts people had said he’s a shoe-in to become a regular which of course made Hajime ecstatic. What was even better was that he made some friends just from tryouts. He thought that maybe if he could show his mother that he was doing just fine in school she wouldn’t make him go to youth group and possibly church.

Which he ended up not getting the results he wanted; since when he told his mother she just smiled and said “I’m glad” which ended the conversation there.

The week ended and the weekend was here and flew by even quicker.

Sunday came along and once again his mother was waking him up early to get to church.

This time he wasn’t as reluctant because Hajime was hoping he’d be able to actually talk to the cute guy from the week before.

Yet when they got there, cute guy wasn’t in sight and Hajime could just sit there wondering if he was coming or, just his luck, they were on vacation and had gone back home since summer was nearing its end.

While Hajime sat there thinking of all the possibilities the music started to play, signaling the beginning of mass.

And when he saw the priest walking down the aisle… pretty boy was there too, as an altar server.

Hajime practically stared at him for the whole beginning of the mass, until the guy noticed, but when he noticed, he just stared back. They made eye contact until the priest cleared his throat to get pretty-boy’s attention to hold up the bible, but he winked at Hajime before doing what he was supposed to.

So there he knew it, the guy wasn’t completely creeped out by Hajime; unless he was staring back for other reasons. But Hajime wanted to keep his hopes to the former and so that’s what he did.

What was weird was that Hajime didn’t feel weird just looking at him, like you might with someone you don’t exactly know. But it was like they were having a conversation with their eyes, he just had to hope that they were signals for what he’s thinking. He made the goal for himself to actually go and talk to him, since he was an altar server, he’d have to stay longer so if Hajime could just wait, maybe he’d be able to catch him.

He didn’t know why he was so obsessed with the thought of this boy he didn’t even know the name of. If you were to say it was ‘love at first sight’ Hajime would probably laugh until he couldn’t stand up, he didn’t believe in that crap whatsoever. Yet here he was, questioning it.

The rest of the service passed by agonizingly slow, all Hajime could do was make up conversations that he could use with the guy when he could finally approach him.

After the service ended he dashed off to find where the altar servers get ready and when he found it, he waited outside the door.

Hajime took a deep breath, telling himself he was really pushing it on the sides of crazy.

After a few minutes the guy finally came out and Hajime took his chance.

“Hi—“

“Tooru, come on we should be leaving!” He was cut short by someone who he guessed was his mom.

_Tooru…_

He bit his lip and then smiled and waved at Hajime, dashing off to his mother and then they were gone.

Hajime sighed, he at least knew his name now, but Tooru wasn’t even the one to tell him so he wondered if that even counted.

With that, Hajime made his own goal that next Sunday he’d actually have a conversation with Tooru.

-

-

Wednesday came along, the day Hajime was dreading.

He really hated the idea yet he was compliant. He wasn’t the asshole he used to be when he was younger. But it was a church activity, so what all could they make them do? Hajime was hoping he’d just be able to pass by with playing on his phone the whole time and hoping he could avoid everyone.

“It’s your first day going and you’re already ten minutes late.” His mother sighed as they turned into the parking lot. There she dropped him off and he muttered a goodbye before walking in the doors of the church.

It probably wouldn’t have been difficult to skip out on, but for some reason Hajime was anticipating that it would be so bad that he actually wanted to find out, as weird as it seems.

He walked until he found the room that his mother had told him and when he opened the door, immediately all eyes were on him.

“Oh! You must be Hajime!” A woman said with a cheery voice. “We were wondering where you were!” She beckoned him in and so he walked.

He sat down in the first open seat, which was next to some guy. Hajime decided that it wasn’t worth his time and laid his head down and let the lady continue talking.

He didn’t realize he had fallen asleep until he was being shaken awake. “Wake up, we’re doing partner activity.” Said the voice who Hajime assumed belonged to the guy he happened to sit next to.

Hajime looked up, eyes still lidded with sleep but when he saw who was waking him up, he went wide eyed.

It was Tooru, Hajime was wondering the odds of this happening and they probably weren’t very small but Hajime took it as a victory anyways.

“O-okay.” Hajime stuttered, sitting up straight.

Tooru laughed and smiled at Hajime. “I’m Tooru Oikawa, pleased to meet you.” He stuck out his hand.

Hajime shook his hand a little hesitant. “Hajime Iwaizumi…” 

“Oh, I know,” Tooru stuck out his tongue. “I noticed that you were staring at me that last two Sundays and was like “Oh friend potential!”” He mocked himself with hand jesters. “And when they were taking attendance last Wednesday and you weren’t there I just sort of hoped it would be you and I was right!” He clapped his hands together and turned to face the table where there was a piece of paper and markers.

“Right…” Hajime just muttered, but in a result Tooru still smiled.

“Anyways, we have to pick a bible verse and explain it with a drawing.” He looked at Hajime.

Hajime sighed. “I don’t know anything about this shit, to be honest.”

Tooru gasped. “Hajime! We do not curse in a church!”

Hajime laughed, closing his eyes. When he opened them, he looked at Tooru to find his face stern. “Oh, shit, you’re serious.” He cleared his throat before widening his eyes and realizing what he said. “Sorry…” Hajime’s face started to heat up.

Tooru broke into a smile again. “Oh, I don’t mind but,” He pointed with his thumb to the front of the room where the advisors were talking. “They have ears like hawks and will hunt you down.” He said it with such a serious tone, and after saying it he just went back to looking at the paper that laid in front of him.

Usually Hajime didn’t have a problem with people, if he didn’t want to talk to them he wouldn’t, if he did he would and conversation would come pretty smoothly. However, none of these were the case. Hajime was stumped for conversation topics even though they had so much to get to know. Still, he just sat there staring while Tooru doodled away on the paper that they were supposed to be working on together.

About thirty seconds passed and Tooru looked up to meet Hajime’s eyes. “You’re staring at me.” He said with a grin.

Oh shit had he? Hajime could feel his cheeks warming up and he was stuttering words that weren’t words before his brain could come to its senses and talk actual English. “Sorry.” He blurted out, but his embarrassment could be heard in his voice.

Tooru kept his stare. “What’re you sorry for?”

“I don’t know, staring?”

“Why would you be sorry for that, it’s a compliment isn’t it?”

Was he flirting? Hajime hoped so because then he wouldn’t have to seem as creepy. “… right.”

Tooru picked up the piece of paper and held it eye level for Hajime to look at. “Anyways, I thought that for this that, like, aliens could be watching over cows so it’d symbolize God watching over us.” He said it with a straight face, which was hard for Hajime to believe he was actually serious about this.

“That doesn’t make sense, dumbass, aren’t the aliens trying to abduct cows? Now, I don’t know how this whole “God” thing works but I’m pretty sure He’s not trying to abduct us.” Before Hajime could stop himself the words were out. Though, from Tooru’s reaction he didn’t take it as harshly as he thought he would.

“Fine, then aliens—“

“Just drop the aliens thing, dumbass.” Hajime deadpanned.

Tooru puffed out his cheeks. “Is that seriously the only insult you can come up with?”

Hajime hesitated a moment. “No, I’m just…”

Tooru laughed lightly. “Thought so. So unless you can come up with something else then we’re sticking with the alien/cow analogy.”

Hajime opened his mouth to respond but—

“Okay, everyone, clean up your things and we’ll present what we have.”  The class complied and within less than two minutes everything was in order. “Alright, who wants to go first.”

And to no surprise, Tooru’s hand shot up. He had that aura around him that he always liked to be first. Sadly for Hajime, he was the opposite and was dreading going up. He elbowed Tooru in the arm in which he just fake-pouted and rubbed where Hajime had hit. But just as fast as it had happened, his face was clear again and he was standing up, which meant Hajime had to, too.

Tooru presented the information while Hajime stood there awkwardly, staring at Tooru the entire time. Just from this simple task, Hajime gathered so much information about Tooru.

For one thing, he was a complete people person, natural around the crowd. It wasn’t a surprise when the advisors said it was wonderful and everyone clapped because frankly, he made shitty information sound like gold. This made Hajime question himself and thought about how boring he was and how boring Tooru must have found him. Though, when they sat back down, all Tooru did was smile and look at him the entire time which put Hajime on edge.

It was a piercing stare that Hajime couldn’t help but feel like Tooru was picking him apart. He didn’t want Tooru to think of him as a prick and Hajime knew that he just kind of looked that way at first glance. But for once he cared what someone thought, he wanted to make a good impression.

So that meant he needed to make an effort.

The class passed by at a decent pace, however, Hajime was more focused on trying to talk to Tooru. Though, he couldn’t help but feel like he was just annoying him because some of the times he would go straight back to paying attention to the lecturer. He smiled, but Hajime felt like he was that kind of person who just smiled to be polite, so after a while he just shut up entirely and settled for glancing at him every so often.

A few minutes later, Hajime felt someone poking at him. It was of course Tooru, but Hajime hadn’t noticed he was zoning out.

“You okay?” Tooru asked, his brow turned up in confusion.

Hajime sat up straight. “Yeah, why do you ask?” He cleared his throat.

Tooru fiddled with his hands and refused to meet Hajime’s eyes. “Well, for a while you were asking me a lot of stuff and I was having fun answering but then you just sorta stopped and I feel like I said something wrong.”

“No, nononono,” Hajime said quickly. “No, the opposite. I thought I was annoying you so I stopped.”

Tooru looked at him wide-eyed. “Don’t think that, Hajime, it takes a lot for someone to annoy me,” He smiled and it made Hajime’s heart leap. “In fact I think people get annoyed with me pretty fast so…”

There was sadness in his voice, though it was said with a smile. Hajime wanted to respond but really, he couldn’t. He barely knew anything about the guy, telling Tooru he wasn’t annoying could’ve been a lie, even if Hajime wanted to believe it was true.

So, he ended up shrugging. Tooru dropped his gaze and stared forward, they didn’t speak until the end of the group.

They had ended on sort of an awkward note, so Hajime wondered if it’d be okay to talk to Tooru again or if he fucked up entirely and Tooru never wanted to speak to him again.

He wouldn’t blame him.

But he decided he had nothing to lose so he called out to him.

“Tooru,” Hajime called. Tooru had started to walk towards the door but turned around. Any awkwardness that showed in his face before was gone and Hajime hoped he could take this as the okay. “Um,” He scratched his head and walked forward, thinking at a mile a minute of what to say. “I’m sorry.” Was the best thing he came up with, _good going Hajime, probably really fucked it up this time._

Tooru’s confused look reappeared on his face. “What’re you sorry for?”

“Making things awkward, being a dick who needs to be punched in the face, being—“

“Woah, wait.” He cut off. “I never said any of those things, stop thinking that.”

“Sorry…”

Tooru walked closer. “Stop saying sorry for things you don’t need to be sorry for,” He stopped in front of Hajime, a normal distance for having a conversation, but oh how Hajime wanted him to stand a little closer. “I don’t know why you think I think those things, but I don’t.”

Hajime nodded and looked at the ground. “Thanks…”

Tooru smiled. “No problem.” There was a vibrating noise and Tooru pulled a phone out of his pocket. He read it, frowned, and put it back in his pocket. “Anyways—“

This time, Hajime cut Tooru off. “Everything alright?”

Tooru hesitated for a moment. “Yeah, my mom just said she was going to be late picking me up and it’s just sorta unlike her and yeah…” He trailed off.

“Oh, okay.” Best response ever.

“Yeah, um,”

“I could, uh, wait with you if you wanted.” How cliché.

The corner of Tooru’s mouth twitched. “Don’t you have to get home?”

Hajime shrugged. “My mom’s not used to picking me up because I usually drive myself places but she needed the car so she could be a while.”

“So you can drive?” Hajime nodded. “That’s cool.” Hajime nodded again. “Maybe you could take me driving sometime.” Tooru laughed, looking at Hajime.

Hajime could feel his cheeks warming up at the thought of just the two of them hanging out. “Wait, really? You’d be okay with that?”

His laughter died down but there was still a smile on his face. “My parents would never let me though, they think driving is a sin so until I’m eighteen I have to follow their rules.”

Hajime could only imagine what kind of idiots Tooru’s parents were. He wanted to hope they were good people, but driving? A sin? “Wait…” Hajime said slowly. “Don’t they drive though…”

“Yeah, but they also go to confession every day, so…” Tooru’s phone buzzed again and Hajime immediately knew it was Tooru’s mother saying she was there. He could feel his heart drop because he really wanted to spend some more time with Tooru. “I gotta go, my mom’s here.”

With that said, Tooru started to walk out of the room, leaving Hajime standing there. At the door frame Tooru turned around. “Thanks for waiting with me.” He said with a sheepish grin.

Before Hajime could think he sputtered out, “Maybe we can hang out some time?” He asked hopefully.

Tooru bit his lip. “I’d like that, but… my parents don’t exactly let me go out so…” He didn’t complete the rest of the sentence and decided to walk out then and there, leaving Hajime there confused and disappointed.

Hajime walked outside a few minutes after Tooru had left. He knew his mother had been there the entire time but he had to do something to stay with Tooru a little longer.

When he got in the car his mother turned to him. “You know, I’ve been out here for ten minutes, I texted you and everything.”

He sighed. “I know, I know, I just made a friend and his ride was running late so I said I’d wait with him…” He knew that if he mentioned his friend that his mother would be delighted and would forget him coming out so delayed immediately.

And delighted she was. “A friend? Who are they? Hajime, that’s wonderful!”

Hajime slouched in his seat as his mother started to pull out of the parking lot. “Tooru Oikawa.”

She grinned. “Really? Hm, I talked to his mother before church started the other day, she seems like a nice lady, I’m glad you and Tooru became acquainted.”

“Yeah…” Hajime smiled to himself. “Me too.”

-

-

Throughout the next few days, all Hajime could think about was when he’d be able to see Tooru again. He should have asked him what school he went to. Hajime hoped it was his school, since it was the local public one, but sadly, he was told there was no Tooru Oikawa that rang a bell.

He had distractions though. Hajime had officially been accepted onto the volleyball team on the Monday that week, they had practices on Mondays, Thursdays, Fridays, and optional Saturdays but Hajime was so distracted he was afraid his game may suffer from it.

Hajime was mentally screaming at himself for not asking for Tooru’s phone number, especially how he pulled it out right in front of him. He usually wasn’t bad about asking for this kind of stuff, but suddenly he was.

Hajime had it bad. He had it so, _so_ bad and he didn’t know what to do about it.

His first legitimate crush. It was a big deal, of course he had no clue how to act around him. _How do people even get to dating?_ He asked himself more than enough times.

Sadly, he never got his answer.

-

-

Sunday rolled around and Hajime was actually up before his mother. He tried to dress like he didn’t care but put way too much effort into it. He was excited to see Tooru, hoping he was there. Possibly even better if her was alter serving again so he could just stare at him the entire time.

For once, the car ride to church wasn’t awkward, Hajime was surprised to say in the least. But the strangest thing was, that his mother didn’t say anything, she just looked like her usual self.

When they pulled into the parking lot they walked in and took to their usual seating. They were about twenty minutes early.

Hajime looked across from him and found Tooru sitting there, looking to the side. He hadn’t noticed Hajime.

Suddenly, his heart beat sped up. He was debating whether or not to go over there and finally, he gathered up some courage, got up, and walked over there.

Hajime plopped himself in the seat next to Tooru, and surprisingly it took a second for him to notice.

Hajime poked his shoulder.

Tooru turned around. His grin appearing faster than a kid waking up on Christmas morning. “Hajime! What’re you doing here?”

“Decided to, ya know, come say hi, heh.” He said things so awkwardly around Tooru, he didn’t know how Tooru could put up with it. Even though… They had barely had a conversation in the first place…

“I see I have rubbed off on you so well that you even want to come sit with me, I am honored, Hajime.” He said dramatically, with hand jesters and everything.

“I wouldn’t say that—“

“Aw, Hajime’s even blushing! Admit it,” He leaned close, bumping Hajime with his shoulder. “You want to be friends with me.” He wagged his eyebrows, looking at Hajime, the look on his face so smug but also cute and…

Hajime bumped him back. “You’re an asshole.” He muttered.

“So mean!” Tooru said loudly. “To think I was considering letting you into my group of friends that is so large, I could barely have fit you in and you’re rejecting this wonderful once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, you will be sorry!” His words were dripping with sarcasm.

“Whatever…” Hajime said. He stood up to leave without thinking. Luckily, Oikawa grabbed his arm and pulled him to sit back down.

“I lied.” He said desperately. “You would be my only friend so please stay.” This time every word was serious. His entire aura changed and Hajime was sucked into it. Hajime was surprised that Tooru said he didn’t have any friends, with his looks you’d think he’d have his own flock.

Tooru was still clinging to Hajime’s arm, practically dragging him down. Hajime put the palm of his hand on Tooru’s forehead and pushed him away, he let his hand linger there. “I was lying too, I didn’t want to leave.”

Tooru pouted and Hajime removed his hand. “Then why did you?” He slouched in his seat, crossing his arms.

“Because I’m a piece of shit who doesn’t know how to react to things other than negatively?” Hajime stated as a question and shrugged, he wondered if that was too much to say to someone who he’s known for such a small amount of time.

Tooru crinkled his brows, confused. “You aren’t,” He looked around before continuing his statement. “shit,” The word was said quieter than the rest, like he was afraid someone was going to swipe him up and send him to the depths of hell for saying such a word. “I don’t think that about you. Now, I don’t know how you act outside of church but here, you’re not half bad.” Tooru grinned. “I’d like to find out for myself if you become crappy after getting to know you.”

Once again the aura had changed around Tooru, he had a strange essence that flowed its way right into Hajime, because he now felt a whole lot calmer.

With that said, Hajime was pretty sure his heart stopped, or that it was going so fast he couldn’t feel it. “I’ll ta- take you up on that deal…” Hajime stuttered out. He was pretty sure he was going to have a permanent blush if they kept talking for any longer. 

Tooru smiled and then the music for the opening song started.

Hajime frowned. “Guess that means I have to go back to my seat…” Slowly he started to get up. Tooru, again, grabbed his arm and pulled him back.  “Damn it, Tooru.” He cursed and turned to look back at a frowning Tooru.

“Or you could stay here for mass… Since the priest is walking down the aisle way anyways, don’t wanna get in his way.” He laughed awkwardly and avoided eye contact. Hajime thought he was dreaming because he could see Tooru’s cheeks turning pink, but only for a split-second because he bowed his head down.

Hajime hesitated. “Alright…” Tooru was now beaming at him and he stood up, dragging Hajime with him.

A woman and man came and stopped at the empty seats next to Tooru. Hajime could only assume they were Tooru’s parents.

Tooru leaned over and whispered something into his mother’s ear. She looked past him, at Hajime, and just sort of stared. Hajime felt like he was being judged then and there. Slowly, she nodded but there was a look of detest on her face.

Tooru turned and brushed shoulders with Hajime and they stood there for the entire time they had to stand, shoulders touching, blushes on their faces, wondering when the service would end.

-

-

Throughout the entire service some part of their body was always touching, sitting was their knees, standing was their shoulders, and when the “peace be with you”’s came, their hands lingered in each other for longer than necessary.

Hajime had no idea what to think of it.

On one hand, Tooru looked like one of those people who flirted with literally everyone, not even flirting by his standards. On the other, he also seemed like he had many friends but Hajime ended up being wrong about that too. Maybe he was destined to always be confused about Tooru Oikawa.

As the closing announcements started, Hajime leaned over and whispered, “So I forgot to ask this before, what school do you go to?”

Tooru looked at his parents before turning back and answering. “Actually, I’ve been homeschooled my entire life.”

Hajime furrowed his brows. “What about phone number then..?”

Tooru bit his lip. “My parents have my phone limited so I can only have their numbers, home phone, and 911.”

That would explain his lack of friends… “Oh…”

“Yeah…” Tooru looked ahead.

A few seconds passed and Tooru gasped quietly and grabbed one of the pencils and envelopes that were kept by for the donation basket. He shoved them into Hajime’s hands. “Write your phone number down on that, I’ll call you from my home phone.”

Hajime hesitated but took the envelope and pencil and scribbled down his phone number. He folded it and handed it to Tooru who looked to make sure his parents weren’t watching and quickly shoved it into his pocket.

He looked at Hajime. “Don’t call me, I can only call you.”

Hajime nodded. How strict were Tooru’s parents? He was… “How old are you anyways?”

Tooru cocked his head to the side. “Seventeen, why?”

“Just wondering… I am too.” He was seventeen, why did his parents have such limited boundaries. He wondered if it had always been like that for Tooru or if something happened to make it like that. Hajime decided not to ask in fear of saying something wrong. Which, knowing himself, would probably happen.

“Huh… must be destiny…” A small smile made its way onto Tooru’s face, slowly. Hajime guessed it was more for himself.

The announcements ended and as soon as the closing song ended Tooru’s mother turned to them.

“Hi, Hajime, I’m Mrs. Oikawa,” She grinned. Everything about it said ‘fake’. “That’s my husband,” The man behind her waved, a bored look on his face. “Thanks for occupying Tooru but we really should be leaving now, come on sweetie.” She placed her hand on Tooru’s shoulder. Hajime wanted nothing more than to smack her hand off of him.

“Coming, mom.” Tooru stayed for a second after his parents shuffled out of the row. He leaned close to Hajime. “I’ll try to call you at some point before Wednesday.”

Hajime nodded, Tooru smiled, and that’s how they left off.

After watching Tooru leave, Hajime went off in search of his mother. He found her standing in the lobby, talking to someone he had never seen in his life. It didn’t surprise him.

His mother grinned and reached out to him. “I was just talking about you, this is Mr. Kiyoko, he has a daughter who’s in your youth group! You would be so cute with her, she’s so pretty!”

Hajime shrugged his mother off. “Ah, hello, I am Hajime.” He stuck his hand out for a handshake.

“Such a well-mannered young man.” Mr. Kiyoko smiled as he took Hajime’s hand.

“Thank you, sir.” He said with the fakest of smiles. “Mom, I’m gonna go wait out in the car.” He pointed towards the exit with his thumb.

“Alright, I’ll be out in a second.” She smiled with her usual people-pleasing voice.

He nodded as his mother handed him the keys and he was out.

As soon as Hajime was in the car, he put his face in his hands and just screamed. He felt so stressed.

He felt so stressed for Tooru. Hajime didn’t know how he could deal with such rules. Hajime barely had any and he still managed to disobey the majority of them.

He felt stressed because his mother was trying to set him up and he only wants to like Tooru.

Everything was just stressing Hajime out. He felt like he wanted to cry, he felt like he wanted to hit something. But instead he just leaned back and thought about that phone call from Tooru and when it’s going to come.

“Where were you throughout mass? I was worried about you.” His mother said as she stepped into the car.

Hajime handed the keys to her. “I went to talk to Tooru and he asked me to sit with him and I thought you wouldn’t mind so I did. But if you don’t want me to—“

“No! No, that’s perfectly fine, honey, I’m so happy for you.” She grinned, putting the keys in the ignition and pulled out of the parking space, starting to drive home.

There were few good things about having a mother obsessed with having a social life, this was one of them.

-

-

Around 1:30 in the morning, Hajime’s phone went off.

He jolted awake, looking at the clock, and groaned. Slowly he reached for his phone and slid the answer button, not even checking who it was.

“Hajime?” The person whispered.

Suddenly Hajime was more awake than he’d be on a regular morning. “Tooru!” He said a little too loudly. He covered his mouth for a second and he could hear quiet laughing from the other line. “Why’re you up so late?” He asked, whispering.

“I wanted to talk to you…” Where had Hajime’s heart gone? It was no longer in his chest.

“I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t waiting for you to call, haha…” He trailed off.

The grin could be heard in Tooru’s voice. “That eager, huh?”

Hajime could feel his face starting to warm up. “No— I mean yes— I mean,” he stuttered. “Ah, fuck it. I was excited for you to call me because I wanted to talk to you too.”

“So… eager?”

“Don’t be such a dick!” Hajime smiled to himself. He felt like a twelve year old talking about whatever twelve year olds get excited over.

He heard Tooru gasp sarcastically. “So mean, Hajime, you’re gonna be sorry one day!”

“Oh yeah? And why’s that?”

“You’d be amazed how much I can make one suffer by tickling. Works wonders on my nephew.”  Each word was spoken with confidence.

Hajime laughed quietly. “Luckily for me, I’m not ticklish.”

Tooru hummed. “Is that right? We’ll just have to find out, won’t we?”

“Oh hell no.”

“Ha! So you are ticklish!”

Defeated, Hajime sighed. “Never told you where though.”

“Guess I’ll just have to find it.” If Tooru were in front of him, Hajime felt like he would have winked. Seems like something Tooru would do.

Hajime stopped, at a loss for words. “What if I told you I was ticklish in some… strange places…” He didn’t know what caused him to say such things. It would probably make Tooru think he’s weird. Hajime wouldn’t blame him.

There was silence.

“So— sorry, that’ was weird.” He laughed awkwardly. Hajime couldn’t even begin to explain how embarrassed he was.

“No…” Tooru hummed. “I’d tickle you until I found it…” The tone Tooru had changed dramatically, to the point that Hajime couldn’t even tell what it meant.

Hearing Tooru say that sent a shiver down Hajime’s spine. “Really?” Hajime’s voice cracked and he wanted to smash his head against the wall.

“You’re cute, Hajime.”

Hajime couldn’t do anything other than start words that had no meaning behind them. How was he supposed to respond to that? Tooru was definitely flirting now, or maybe he wasn’t? Hajime still couldn’t tell, but he was hoping the former was true.

Tooru laughed on the other line _and his laugh was so cute._ Hajime wanted to say it but he knew it wouldn’t come out as smoothly as Tooru had said it.

“I—“

“You’re flustered? I can tell,” His voice was so inviting. Hajime wished he could hear him like this all the time. “Are you blushing, Hajime?”

“N— no!” He stuttered.

“Ha, you’re so bad at lying, Hajime.” The amount of times Tooru used Hajime’s name was unnecessary, though he couldn’t say he minded. In fact, the way Tooru said his name made Hajime’s heart leap each time.

Hajime sighed. “I know.”

The grin noticeable in his voice, “So you are blushing?”

“I didn’t say that…” Hajime muttered.

“It was implied though.” Tooru said with a sing-song voice.

“I will hang up this phone.”

“So mean!”

“Says the one who keeps questioning the color of my cheeks.”

“blu-shing,” He sounded out the syllables.

“I hate you.”

“No you don’t.”

“If I were there right now, I’d hit you.”

“I wish you were here…” Tooru said without skipping a beat.

Hajime hesitated, fidgeting on his bed. “Me too…”

“I’ll see you Wednesday though.” His tone a bit happier.

“Yeah, Wednesday…”

“I don’t want to wait that long…”

“Me either.”

“Aw, Hajime!”

Hajime wanted to bang his head against the wall. He had no control over what he said to Tooru, it was a bad habit that would come back and bite him at some point.

They talked like that, eventually venturing off into random shit, until Hajime looked at the clock and was shocked by the time.

“Tooru, it’s almost 4 in the morning.”

Laughter. “Not a problem for me.”

“It is for me, though, you asshole!”

“Perks of being homeschooled~”

Hajime groaned. “I have to wake up in, like, two hours.”

More laughter. “Have fun at school, Hajime.”

“You’re a piece of shit, you know that, right?”

“Oh, you love me and you know it.”

Hajime’s words were trapped in his throat, like all of the sudden every single word he knew disappeared from his brain.

Tooru laughed awkwardly. “Anyways,” his voice cracked and he could hear a quiet ‘dang it’ before he continued. “You should probably go to sleep; I’ll try to call you before Wednesday.”

Hajime cleared his throat. “Haha… Right…”

They sat there, silence between them.

“I don’t want to hang up…” Tooru sighed.

“On the count of three?”

“Three.”

“One.” Hajime said.

“Two.” Tooru said.

“Three.” They both said, yet neither of them hung up.

Hajime could feel his heart beating a mile a minute because of what he was about to ask. “Could you wait on the line until I fall asleep..?”

“Hajime, that’s so cute! Stop it, you’re gonna make me blush!”

“Am not!”

Tooru sighed. “Whatever you say. But yeah, I’ll wait, now go sleep and I’ll tell you a story.”

“I’m not four.”

“Do you want me to stay on the line or not?”

Hajime sighed. “Okay, fine.”

“Goodnight, Hajime~” Tooru hummed.

“Goodnight…”

And with that, Hajime lay down, settling into his bed. Tooru started to speak and Hajime fell asleep to the guys’ voice that he had fallen for.

-

-

On Monday after school, Hajime had almost gotten hit with more volleyballs than he could count. Not that that took much, he was so tired he could barely speak in sentences.

One of the guys he had made friends with, Tetsurou Kuroo, jogged up to him. Everyone called him by his last name though, never found out why, never made the effort. “Yo, Hajime, you alright?”

Hajime yawned. “Yeah… Late night.”

“Oh?” Kuroo grinned. “Why’s that?”

“None of your business…”

“Bokuto! Get over here!” Kuroo yelled. Koutaro Bokuto, again going by his last name, and again, Hajime had no idea why. The names did fit them better than their first names quite honestly, and frankly Hajime was content with his own conclusion.

Hajime sighed. “You don’t need Bokuto over here.”

“Why would I not be needed?” Bokuto said as he walked closer, giant grin spread across his face.

“So,” Kuroo started. “Our friend Hajime here, had a _late night_.”

“Oho?”

“If you know what I mean.” He nudged Bokuto.

“Oho ho ho?”

Hajime couldn’t find it in himself to care.

“It’s no big deal,” He yawned again. “We’re just friends, have barely even known each other for longer than a few weeks.”

“Ha!” Kuroo jumped and pointed at him. “For all you know I could’ve been saying something about you studying, or maybe you had a wanking marathon, who knows, but you said it yourself!”

Bokuto wagged his eyebrows. “So, who are they?”

“I said it was no one.” Hajime started to walk away to the bench to grab a water bottle.

Kuroo grabbed it out of his hands. “Nuh-uh, not until you tell us.”

“Yeah!” Bokuto added.

Hajime sighed, again, this was going to be a long conversation. Though, in the back of Hajime’s mind, he knew he wasn’t going to get anywhere until he told them about Tooru.

“ _Who are they?_ ” Kuroo pressed. Bokuto and him came to an uncomfortable distance.

Hajime put his hands up in defense. “Fine, fine, okay. “ Hajime scratched the back of his head. “You guys are so annoying, god damn.”

“We try.” Bokuto said, smiling. Kuroo nodded in agreement.

“His name is Tooru Oikawa.”

“YOU’RE EVEN BLUSHING AT HIS NAME YOU GOT IT SO BAD HOLY SHIT!” Kuroo doubled over laughing and Bokuto joined in. They leaned on each other for support. They were really over exaggerating.

“Shut up!” He punched both of them in the shoulder. “I know, okay, don’t have to rub it in.” Hajime mumbled.

Kuroo wiped a tear from his eye. “I don’t know who this guy is, but you should just ask him out, man.” Bokuto nodded in agreement.

Hajime cursed under his breath. “I swear to God, you guys are only here to annoy me.”

Bokuto shrugged. “It’s what we do and if you hated it you would’ve stopped talking to us a long time ago.”

He really was appreciative of his friends, even if they were like this at times. “Yeah, alright assholes.”

“I bet he’s got it just as bad.” Kuroo said, resting his arm on Hajime’s shoulder for support.

Hajime rolled his eyes, shrugging his arm off. But Kuroo being Kuroo, he just did it again and Hajime accepted defeat. “I doubt it.”

“And why’s that?” Bokuto placed his hands on his hips and Hajime swears sometimes these two are his long lost parents and his mother had actually just adopted him.

“Have you taken a look at me?”

“The Hajime Special and this _Tooru_ wants a full serving.” Kuroo said.

“That is the lamest thing that has ever came out of your mouth and believe me I have listened to Bokuto and your conversations.”

“True, but at least Bokuto and I had the guts to ask out the guys we like.” Kuroo deadpanned and Bokuto nodded triumphantly.

“Bokuto, I highly doubt you asked Keiji out, in fact I _know_ you didn’t, I was there when it happened.” Hajime sighed, going to grab the water bottle Kuroo ever so rudely took.

“The fact of the matter is,” Bokuto stated as Hajime swiped the water bottle out of Kuroo’s hands. “You won’t ask this dude out.”

“Maybe I will! When the time is right!”

“Yeah, okay.” Kuroo said.

Before Hajime could respond, they were being yelled at to get back to practice. So they did and Hajime did his best to spike as hard as he could to Kuroo or Bokuto because he knew they were right, but he would never admit it.

As practice went on, Hajime ended up being told to sit out because again, he was practically getting hit with volleyballs every time someone served or spiked or whatever. Every time there was a water break Kuroo and Bokuto would come over to say something to him, but he’d be lying if he said he was paying attention.

When practice ended, Hajime threw his two friends towels and their water bottles and stood up to leave. Him doing that was an invitation for them to follow, but he didn’t know what he was about to get himself into. They were always a hit or miss, honestly.

“Hajime, stop walking so fast!” Bokuto panted, jogging to catch up, Kuroo in tow. “You saw how intense those last drills were!” Hajime had stopped and decided to let them catch up, he wasn’t that mean. Bokuto bent over, balancing his hands on his knees as Kuroo finally appeared at his side. Not as out of breath as Bokuto, he had a surprising amount of stamina which kind of scared Hajime.

Hajime sighed and looked them over. “Let’s sit outside.”

The two looked at each other but nodded, following Hajime out the doors of the gymnasium.

Hajime found the usual tree they sat at when they decided to hang out after practice. The three sat down, Hajime leaning up against the trunk of the tree.

For a few minutes they just sat in silence and Hajime deemed this as a good day. He was anticipating them to bury him with questions about Tooru, frankly.

He closed his eyes, throwing back his head and enjoying the quiet air.

Of course it was too good to be true.

“So,” Kuroo sat with his legs up in front of him. He rested his head on his knees. “When’re you going to see this _Tooru_ again?”

He sighed. “Wednesday.”

“Do you guys already have a planned date? That’s so cute!” Bokuto yelled. The way he said ‘cute’ was nowhere near as effective as when Tooru said it.

Sigh, again. “No, we go to youth group, it’s how we met.” Hajime muttered.

“Hmm…” Kuroo tapped his fingers against his knee. “Never saw you as a church go-er.”

“My mom forces me!” Hajime protested. It wasn’t a lie. He still disliked church, but Tooru being there made it all worthwhile.

Bokuto was staring at Hajime, he could feel it. “Doesn’t seem like it.” He paused. “At least, anymore.”

Hajime lifted his arm up, pointing his finger at the sky. “Bingo.” He said with no emotion to his voice.

Before, they were just teasing Hajime about his crush, now their attitudes had changed and Hajime could tell they were actually trying to get the full story. Because they wanted to help? Who knows, you never do with them.

There was silence, but the air was tense. When he finally looked at them they both were contemplating with the information Hajime had given them.

“Why not tonight?” Kuroo questioned. “You don’t have any plans, right?”

Hajime scoffed. “You don’t know that.”

Kuroo laughed. “Damn you’re funny, man.”

He sighed, “Yeah, yeah, I know.” Hajime pursed his lips, wondering if it was okay for him to share this information with his friends. “His parents are really strict and don’t let him hang out with people.”

“Shit,” Bokuto chimed in. “That sucks dude. What about a phone date like you guys had last night?”

Hajime could feel his face warming up. “It wasn’t a date…” Kuroo and Bokuto gave him the biggest ‘that’s bullshit’ face, and he knew it was too, at least to an extent. It wasn’t a date officially, but they were definitely talking like how two would on a date. Suggestive phrases, awkward pauses, permanent blushing, Hajime couldn’t bring himself to the reality of it. “Anyways… His parents are super strict about that too, his cellphone is limited to his parents numbers and 911.”

“So,” Kuroo furrowed his brows. “How did you guys talk last night?”

“Well, yesterday at church we sat with each other—“

“Score one for Hajime!” Bokuto shouted through cupped hands. Kuroo punched him in the shoulder but he just shrugged.

Hajime rolled his eyes before continuing. “At the end when we were talking, he told me to give him my phone number so he could call me from his home phone, which is why we were up so late.”

“How old is he?”

“That’s what I said,” Hajime laughed through a breath. “He’s seventeen.”

“What the fuck? You’d think he was, like, thirteen and his parents were just pissed he was interested in a seventeen year old, but…” Kuroo trailed off.

Bokuto hummed. “Maybe we should start going to church and youth group with you, ya know, occupy his parents and you guys can hang out more.”

The idea behind it was genuine and sentimental, but he knew it’d only cause trouble. Hajime sat up straight. “Yeah, no.”

Bokuto pouted. “But—“

Kuroo cut him off. “No, I agree, it’d probably just end up getting Tooru in trouble and even more limitations than he already has, if that’s possible.”

Bokuto nodded in defeat, beginning to concentrate on probably another plan.

“You guys don’t have to worry, this’ll work out, I mean we barely know each other so it’s not a big deal right now.” Hajime said, more for his benefit than Kuroo and Bokuto’s. He just needed to tell himself that, even though it was probably a lie.

“Nah, that’s not what I’m getting at.” Kuroo scrunched his nose. “It’s probably a big deal to Tooru, I know I’d be going insane if I were cooped up like that all day aside from church and youth group.”

Hajime hadn’t even thought about that. What if Tooru _was_ silently going crazy? Seventeen years like that? He was surprised Tooru could even do it for _that_ long.

“True…” He trailed off.

“Maybe,” Kuroo jumped to his feet as Bokuto and him remained seated. “You could sneak into his house from time to time, ya know, bring some movies over or your laptop and watch some Netflix.” He held his chin, pondering, and started to pace back and forth. “Yeah, that may just work.”

“I could talk to him on Wednesday, but I doubt it.”

Bokuto now jumped to his feet, smiling. “Or, you could come without him knowing so he wouldn’t have a chance to reject you!” His grin fell. “Unless he slammed the door in your face…”

“Hmm…” Hajime felt awkward being the only one sitting, but frankly he couldn’t find it in himself to care. “That’s a possibility, but I should probably wait until we’ve known each other for longer, just so I won’t seem creepy.”

“Y’all are already this deep in flirting and you’re worried about sounding creepy?” Bokuto placed his hands on his hips, quirking his brow.

Hajime finally decided to stand. “Stop saying that!” But the two could probably read him easier than a book, knowing that Hajime was actually really pleased with hearing that.

“You could—“

“Just ask the dude out already.”

The three jumped, Bokuto letting out a small scream. Kuroo, of course, laughed at him as it happened.

The blunt sentence came from Kozume, Kuroo’s  boyfriend.

“How long have you been there?” Hajime huffed out, feeling his chest to make sure he was still alive.

He held a 3DS in hand and didn’t even look up from the game to answer him. “Long enough, I guess. You like Tooru, Tooru likes you, just skip youth group together, it isn’t that hard.”

Hajime stood there, his mouth hanging open. It was such a simple idea but Hajime hadn’t even thought about it.

Kozume sighed and closed the game. “Come on, Kuroo, I’m tired and want to go home. Bokuto, Keiji’s looking for you.”

Kuroo slid up next to Kozume and put his arm around him. It kind of looked like Kuroo was choking him but all Kozume did was look annoyed.

“Right!” Bokuto said and ran off into the gym.

“Keiji’s already outside, but okay.” Kozume said quietly.

Kuroo stifled a laugh. “When will that idiot learn?” He sighed, grinning. “Anyways, good luck with Tooru, Hajime. I’m rooting for you.” He punched Hajime softly in the shoulder.

“Me, too.” Kozume muttered.

Hajime let a small smile fall onto his face. “Thanks, guys…”

-

-

That night, Hajime waited by his phone. He was exhausted yet wide awake.

He waited until he fell asleep, but this time he had no voice to listen to.

-

-

“What happened to you?” Bokuto turned his head to look at Hajime. They were in their chemistry class, which conveniently they were allowed to pick their lab partners for the semester and well, you can connect the dots. “You look like you were hit by a train.”

Hajime yawned. He really wasn’t in the mood. It wasn’t that he was angry that Tooru didn’t call him, he knew it’d be a nonconsecutive thing.

“Were you up the entire night _again_?” Bokuto grinned. “Ha, you and Tooru are really hitting it off, huh.”

Hajime laid his head on the lab table. “No.”

Bokuto’s aura wasn’t as strong as Tooru’s, but he could definitely feel the mood change. Knowing that Bokuto was trying to think of what to say next.

When Kuroo and Bokuto were separated they actually made pretty great friends, not that they weren’t together. Though when you were alone with one of them they stayed on serious topics easier, could concentrate without taunts or laughing.

“You alright, dude?” Bokuto asked, concerned. He patted Hajime’s back.

Hajime groaned quietly. “Yeah, I just stayed up kinda late waiting to see if he would call.”

“You have it so bad…” Bokuto sighed. “I actually kind of feel bad for you.” He knew the meaning behind it had good intentions, but again: Hajime wasn’t in the best of moods.

“Really? I haven’t noticed.” He said bitterly. Hajime hit the table with his fist. “I’m sorry.” He sat up and sighed. “I just don’t know what to do about it…”

“Well for one,” Bokuto picked up his pencil and opened his notebook. “You could stop waiting for him to call you. Like you said, it isn’t something guaranteed to happen daily so you can’t always get your hopes up.”

He knew Bokuto was right, but didn’t know where to go from there. He felt bad asking so much of Bokuto, his love life shouldn’t have to worry him. Hajime just really wanted this topic to leave his mind, but also stay, but also leave, it was complicated. Mostly he just wanted to be able to talk to Tooru whenever he wanted. He wanted to drive over to his house and break through the door and tell his parents off that caging up their child isn’t going to do anything good for them.

Then, there was Kuroo’s idea in the back of his mind. Maybe he could sneak in from time to time. Hajime had a feeling that Tooru wouldn’t be opposed to it. Finally, he concluded that he would talk to Tooru about it the next day, which he had constantly been reminding himself was Wednesday.

Luckily for him, he didn’t have another practice until Thursday so he didn’t have to worry about being told to sit out because he couldn’t see what was right in front of him. Frankly he thought it would end up being even worse than Monday.

The bell rang and Bokuto and Hajime said their farewells, it was going to be a long day.

Well, his previous thoughts were wrong. His day was going by fairly quick, yet again, he was sleeping through practically every class.

Then lunch came around and Kuroo plopped himself down next to Hajime, Kozume following, sitting across the table.

“What’s up with you?” Kuroo asked.

“Tired.”

“Oho? Is it from—“

Hajime cut him off. “Don’t say it, I already had this conversation with Bokuto. No, I wasn’t talking to Tooru all night, stop questioning it.”

Kuroo held up his hands in defense. “Damn, dude. Just trying to make friendly conversation here.”

“Silence would be appreciated.” Hajime mumbled, laying his head in his arms.

“I second that.” Kozume said from the other side of the table.

“Thanks, Kozume.” He looked up at Kozume who nodded and went back to whatever he was doing. “Anyways, wake me up when the bell rings.” Hajime yawned and laid his head back down.

“Noooo,” Kuroo whined, shaking Hajime. ”Have a conversation with me!”

Kuroo seemed whinier today. Hajime wondered if something was wrong but decided not to question it.

“Fine, fine.” Hajime sighed, sitting up. “What do you want to talk about?”

Kuroo hummed and tapped his fingers on the table. After a few seconds he just shrugged and looked at Hajime apologetically.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me.” Unsurprisingly, Kuroo doing that really pissed Hajime off. He didn’t want to deal with school for the rest of the day. Hajime sighed and stood up, picking up his bag along with him.

Kuroo frowned. “Where are you going?” He asked. Hajime didn’t even know where he was going, he just didn’t want to be surrounded by all these people for the next few hours.

“I don’t know…” He muttered. “I just want to get out of here.” Swaying from back and forth, Hajime tried to sort through his thoughts. A place to go specifically. His mother probably wasn’t home, so he could go there, but ironically he didn’t want to be there either.

“So you’re gonna skip?” Kuroo asked, standing up alongside Hajime. “We can take my car if you want.”

Hajime furrowed his brows. “You don’t have to do that, I wasn’t really asking for you to come with me anyways.”

Kuroo laughed. “Too bad I’m an asshole who invites themselves to things.” On the inside, Hajime was actually pretty grateful, he didn’t know what he would do if he didn’t have someone with him. More importantly, he didn’t know where he’d go. Wandering around the city wouldn’t have been a bad idea, that is, if he actually knew his way around. He was still fairly new in town and was still learning the geography of the place.

“Fine…” He grumbled.

Grinning, Kuroo looked back. “Aye, Kozume, you gonna come?”

Kozume shook his head without looking up from his 3DS that he had pulled out at some point.

“Alright, I’ll pick you up when school ends, then.” He nodded as Kuroo walked around the table and gave a quick peck to Kozume’s forehead.

Hajime was confused by Kuroo and Kozume’s relationship, to say in the least. The two were complete opposites, and not in the sense of “opposites attract”.  But they acted so nice together, Kuroo looks at Kozume like he’s the only star in the sky. Such appreciation was admirable, Hajime had to admit. He wanted that to be him and Tooru one day.

When they were actually out on the road, Hajime looked to Kuroo. “So, where are we going?”

He hummed, leaning back and steering with one hand. “I’m wondering that myself.”

“What the fuck, dude?!” Hajime turned and smacked him on the shoulder. “You invite yourself to skip with me and you didn’t even have an idea of where you wanted to go?” He wanted to take back what he was thinking about Kuroo and Kozume, but he knew better. Usually Kuroo did know what he was doing, he just liked seeing people react. He didn’t look it, but Kuroo was actually really smart and played life like it was some science experiment in testing.

After that, the two ended up bickering for a good few minutes until they decided to just meander around the nearby park.

“I just wasted so much gas on you, you better be thanking me.” Which was funny, considering Kuroo was the one who chose to do this anyways.

They ended up on the swings, just sitting there. It was a comfortable silence and Hajime was grateful that the two were able to do something like this. Before he moved, Hajime didn’t have any real friends. He didn’t realize that until now. Once he started hanging out with Kuroo and Bokuto and everyone else he realized how much his so called friends from before treated him like shit.

Since then, Hajime had learned how to be a friend as well. Because of these people he had met, he had become less of a dick and more of a civilized person. Sure, he still didn’t have the best temper, and he had a bit of a habit of calling people names. But lately, he’s realized that when he insults someone, it’s usually someone he genuinely likes, whether it be romantic or platonic.

Which brought him back to thinking about Tooru and how many times he had called him a dick or asshole.

Hajime used insults like pet names. The good thing was, his friends understood that and laughed it off. Tooru did too, which was probably one of the reasons he was so drawn to him as well. When you find someone who understands you, you really want to keep them close by.

“So,” Kuroo turned the swing to look at Hajime. “What are you actually going to do about your whole thing with Tooru? I mean, I’m genuinely concerned for you two.”

The last time he saw Kuroo so serious was when he was talking about Bokuto and Keiji getting together. That, and volleyball, he was always really serious while he was playing.

“Honestly, I’m not sure…” And he wasn’t. There were so many things floating around in his mind, it was overwhelming. They still barely knew each other and Hajime was already thinking about all of this stuff. Tooru would probably find it creepy. All they knew was that they could have a four hour conversation talking about nothing and flirting in stupid ways leaving flustered teenage boys. “I don’t really want to worry about it right now.”

Kuroo sighed. “Yeah, I understand.”  He stood up from the swing. “Just don’t get yourself hurt, okay? I know how you can get.”

“Thanks, Kuroo.” And he really did mean it. Once again referring back to how many amazing friends he had made.

“Now come on, I’ll race you to the car.” With that he took off running and Hajime had no choice but to chase after his friend, calling after him, letting him know he’s a cheater.

-

-

School ended Wednesday afternoon, Kuroo and Bokuto wished him luck with Tooru, he went home, and he lay on his bed anxious and impatiently waiting for seven o’clock to come.

His mother got home around six, Hajime asked to leave at 6:15.

“You know we don’t live more than ten minutes away from the church, right?” His mother turned to look at him. “Are you alright?”

Sort of? “Yeah, just, I wanted to do something before it started?” Well, it wasn’t a lie. This entire thing was a gamble, he had no idea if Tooru arrived early to these things, but he was willing to try. That being said, if he didn’t then there wasn’t much time before it started anyways so he could just deal.

Which was a new mindset he had noticed, was he fond of it? Who knows? His mother would be though. She was all about this kind of stuff.

“You sound unsure.”

He sighed. “Mom, I have friends there and I wanted to talk to them before the thing starts, okay?”

She clapped her hands together and moved to grab her keys. “Alright. Then let’s go!” She was so easy to persuade.

When he was dropped off, his mother wished him a good time and said she’d be running errands again. Hajime just waved her off and walked inside, hoping for the best.

He took a deep breath before walking into the room and…

 _He was there._ Hajime wanted to literally run up and hug him, and he would have, if there weren’t as many people in the room.

There was so much excitement in Hajime, just over this little thing. He didn’t know why. Well, he did, but he didn’t know why it made him so excited, he had never been this excited over a person before. But then again, he had never met anyone like Tooru Oikawa.

Slowly, he walked into the room. Tooru’s back was facing the door, so he hadn’t seen Hajime yet.

He was planning on putting his hand on Tooru’s shoulder to get his attention (that and he just really wanted to touch him), but that dream was put to rest when the advisor greeted him.

“Hajime! Nice to see you’re here early!”

Inside his head he was rolling his eyes and questioning why, but on the outside he tried to smile and waved.

Tooru turned around to see him, he was smiling that smile Hajime had become so fond of. “Hey.”

Hajime made it to the table Tooru was sitting at and just said screw it and put his hand on his shoulder to greet him anyways.

His hand lingered for a second too long and he squeezed Tooru’s shoulder before letting go and moving to sit down. To Hajime’s satisfaction, it just made Tooru smile even larger.

“I’m really happy you’re here early.” He said. Hajime looked at Tooru, he had never noticed how pretty his eyes were. They weren’t any special color, they were just so warm and held so much emotion and he just wanted to stare forever.

But, just his luck, his phone buzzed and his first instinct was to check it so he did, breaking away from his stare.

It was Bokuto, which wasn’t a surprise.

**From: Bokuto  
u should take a picture w/ tooru and show it to us tmrrw!!! good luck dude, go get ‘em ;)**

He looked back up to find Tooru staring. “Who was that?”

“Ah,” Hajime put his phone back in his pocket. “Just my friend.”

“What’d they want?” Hajime couldn’t blame Tooru for his inquisitive nature, he would be too if he were kept away from society.

That aside, he didn’t really want to tell Tooru that Bokuto wanted a picture of him and attached to that was him telling him to basically not make a fool out of himself and actually ask his crush out. “You’re nosy.”

Tooru frowned, jokingly, and Hajime couldn’t look away. He had the best pouting face that he could probably have someone hand him one million dollars just from using it. It was probably more exaggerated with Hajime’s thinking, and it was just a matter of he liked the dude, but he gave in anyways.

“Uh,” It was getting harder and harder to look Tooru in the eyes while he talked, like he couldn’t do the two things at once. “He just wanted a picture of us.”

Tooru’s smile twisted into a devious expression. “Does that mean you talked about me to your friends, Hajime?”

“Uh..”

“What’d you say?” He scooted his chair closer to Hajime. “That you met the most elegant human being on the planet and you were just so eager to come see him again, like I was the Cinderella to your prince charming?” The exaggerated gestures just added more to the effect. He even said it in a sarcastic-yet-serious-yet-kinda-staged voice. _He wasn’t completely off…_ Hajime thought, and that was the scary part.

“Uh…”

Tooru squinted and waved his hand in front of Hajime’s face. “Earth to Hajime! I would like you to answer me!”

He was trying. “Workin’ on it…” He muttered looking down into his lap.

“Well, whatever.” Again, Tooru moved his chair closer. “Let’s take that picture!”

“Wait, you’re actually okay with that?” Hajime asked as he started to pull his phone out of his pocket.

Tooru cocked his head to the side. “Why wouldn’t I? I love cameras!”

Hey, there’s an opposite.

“Oh really?”

“Yes, now camera time.” He played with his bangs, trying to get them in the “right position” or whatever. He didn’t really need to, but then again everything about Tooru looked good to Hajime.

“Alright…” Quickly, he opened the camera app and lifted his phone to an angle. “Uh, let’s move a little closer.”

“Oo, Hajime getting scandalous, I like it~” Tooru winked. Hajime wanted to punch him in the shoulder, but as Tooru put it: camera time. He just settled for rolling his eyes.

The picture ended up with Tooru holding a peace sign next to his face, sticking his tongue out, and winking and Hajime looking like… Hajime… Which in that sense meant pink cheeks and looking at Tooru rather than the camera.

It only turned out that way because he was apparently “taking too long to press the button” in Tooru’s words, so he took it upon himself to press it multiple times. So not only did they have the original, but also a bunch of others that were blurry with movements because of Hajime trying to get his phone back. When he finally managed, he saw that Tooru had taken roughly eighty pictures, and surprisingly only a few of them were colored blobs.

“There,” Tooru laughed. “Like they say, the more the merrier!”

It wasn’t even that he was angry, in fact he was kind of happy but his first thought was to punch him in the shoulder, which is exactly what he did. “You think you’re funny, don’t you?”

He held his arm where Hajime had punched him but with confidence, Tooru responded, “Yes, and I bet you think I’m funny, too.” Which was true, but Hajime would never admit it.

The youth group was called to start and the two stared at each other, none of them moving, none of them paying attention, knees touching.

-

-

At the beginning, the person apologized for there not being any fun activities recently and asked for suggestions.

Hajime wasn’t paying attention, he was too busy focusing on kicking Tooru’s feet because he kept trying to touch him with his. He wouldn’t realize until the next day that Tooru was playing footsie with him.

They continued like that for a bit until Hajime remembered what Kozume had said about skipping together.

He leaned close to Tooru. “Hey,” He whispered. “I’m gonna ask to use the bathroom, you should wait, like, five minutes and then ask too, okay?”

Tooru looked confused but nodded anyways.

So Hajime got permission to leave and all he had to do was wait for Tooru to do the same.

There wasn’t exactly any planning behind this, Hajime didn’t remember that until he was already out the door. What did he even want to talk to him about? What was there to do? Well, there were a lot of things to do, but Tooru probably wasn’t up to them.

After the few minutes had passed, he heard footsteps coming from the way of the classroom and Tooru appeared around the corner.

He smiled at Hajime. “So, what now?”

Hajime breathed out a laugh. “About that… I haven’t gotten that far yet?”

At first, Tooru seemed confused, but them he broke out into a grin. “Hajime?” He took a step closer. “Did you just want to spend more time with me?”

Hajime’s blood went cold because that’s exactly why. “What gave you that idea?” He asked, it was no use though, he knew Tooru could tell when he was lying.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to be embarrassed, because I wanted the same.” Tooru said. How did he say it with a straight face? How could one talk this easily without getting flustered?

Hajime could feel his cheeks warming up, it felt like he was on fire. There were no responses coming to his head so all he could do was stare at Tooru until either he spit something out or Tooru decided he wanted to say anything.

He laughed. “Alright, come on I know some cool places.” With that, Tooru grabbed Hajime’s hand and guided him into the unknown.

-

-

What’s scarier than a church at night? A dark church at night. It was practically pitch black. Basically, the youth group room was the only one they had bothered to turn the lights on for because apparently they’re okay with people getting sucked up into the darkness never to be heard from again.

The only perk was that Tooru still hadn’t let go of Hajime’s hand, but it wasn’t like they were walking in sync. No, Tooru was practically dragging Hajime around the place because he still hadn’t said exactly where they were going.

Finally they came across this door, it was large and metal and had a small window that was about eye level.

“What is this…” Hajime asked as Tooru let go of his hand, much to Hajime’s dismay, to turn the knob.

“Hold on.” Tooru walked in, leaving Hajime in the halls. But then there was light and Tooru told Hajime to follow.

They ended up in this room with a kitchen and small dining area.

“So again: What is this?” Hajime asked when they sat down at one of the tables.

“Like twenty, twenty-five years ago nuns and priests and all those people used to live here, it was sort of like dorms because they didn’t usually stay here longer than a few years. Now they don’t do that so we just have the place, they use the kitchen to cook for events and if it’s a smaller event they’ll use this dining room.” Tooru explained, signaling around as he went.

“How’d you find out about this place..?”

Tooru laughed. “Well it’s not that hard to miss and when you spend most of your life in a church you kind of get to know the place.”

“Um,” Hajime folded his hands on the table. “If you don’t mind me asking, why are your parents so strict about all this, I mean, limiting you to just a church?”

Tooru’s expression didn’t falter, like he was used to answering this question. “They’re paranoid, I guess.”

“A little too paranoid.” Hajime said under his breath.

Though, he didn’t really seem bothered by it. Tooru just shrugged. “Yeah, but it’s whatever.”

Hajime furrowed his brows. “It’s not whatever, Tooru. They’re taking your life away from you and it’s not okay.”

“Well what do you think you can do about it? You don’t think I haven’t tried reasoning with them?” This was the first time he had seen Tooru look agitated in any way.

He went silent and looked at the ground. This was a face Hajime never wanted to see Tooru make. Because you can tell that some of their happiness is fake; you can sense there's times when they just break apart when they're alone but no one ever sees because they put on that smile everyone's so used to seeing.

Tooru sighed but his breath was unsteady. It took Hajime a moment to see that he was crying. He sniffled and brought a hand to his face, wiping away what Hajime guessed was a tear.

It broke his heart, to say in the least. Hajime wanted nothing more than to go over and hug him. What was stopping him? Tooru definitely looked like he needed comforting but then Hajime reminded himself that he actually doesn't know that much about Tooru, maybe he doesn't like being touched, who knows? That was a lie and Hajime knew it. He wouldn't have been squished side by side for an hour by Hajime if he didn't like being touched.

Still, he couldn't gather up enough courage to go over there. Hajime was a coward, he wasn't the one who should be there with him, Tooru needed someone who actually knew how to comfort people, Hajime wasn't one of them.

Tooru sniffled a few more times. "I'm sorry, this is stupid."

"Tooru..."

"My folks are trying to stuff me into this box of perfection and I just don't fit and every time I talk to them about it they just tell me to pray and God'll answer me," He swallowed loudly. Tooru lifted up his head and his cheeks were splotchy. With light force, he hit the table. "That's a load of crap though because it _never works._ "

All he could do was sit there. So many things Hajime could have done, and he chose to just sit there and let Tooru cry.

He was quivering when he looked Hajime in the eyes. "What do I do, Hajime? It's so lonely sitting at my house all day. I want to hang out with you. You're the first person who's stayed, who hasn't gotten annoyed with me and decided I wasn't worth it. I don't know why though, I'm trash, trash king." Tooru laughed through his hiccups from crying.

Hajime wanted to interrupt and say they hadn't known each other for that long, but stopped himself because Tooru was already upset and Hajime wanted to stay with him for a while anyways.

Finally Hajime was thinking straight and gained enough courage to stand up from his seat. He walked over and looked at Tooru the entire time and Tooru stared back and he could see Tooru was trying so hard to keep his tears in. It just felt so natural, going in for a hug like that, like it should happen every time Tooru was upset. So Hajime set the goal for himself: he wanted to make Tooru as happy as possible.

When Hajime opened his arms and started to lean in, Tooru jumped up right into the embrace, letting out a shuddering sob. He held onto Hajime so tight and Hajime held him right back.

There was silence, save for Tooru's crying. They stood there, completely isolated in this small section of the church.

Hajime pet Tooru's hair whispering, "Hey, Tooru, it's fine, everything will be fine, I'm here now, don't worry." He wished everything he was saying was true, but really, he didn't know if he was going to be okay or not. That's what terrified him.

Hajime could feel Tooru nod and he backed away, wiping his eyes. "Thanks, Hajime, I'm really happy you're here."

"It's no problem." Hajime tried to smile, but judging by Tooru's expression it didn't work out well.

Tooru laughed. "You look so scary when you're trying to force yourself to smile." At any other time Hajime would have been offended, but at this moment he was just relieved to see Tooru smiling again.

The entire night he had been wondering when the right time was to ask him about Kuroo's idea, he concluded now was as good as any.

"Say, Tooru," Hajime bit his lip. "So um, since you're lonely and all I was thinking maybe I could sneak into your house from time to time? Bring some movies? I could bring my laptop? I dont know." There was silence with Tooru just blankly staring at Hajime. "Never mind." The blood was flowing to his cheeks, it was probably noticeable too. "It was a stupid idea, sorry."

"No!" Tooru said quickly. "No! I was just thinking! I don't know how it'd work but that'd be amazing. That would make my life. Gosh, I'm so happy right now, I could kiss you," Tooru went wide-eyed and Hajime did too and Tooru's cheeks turned pink and Hajime could feel his heart leap. "I'm sorry." He hid his face in his hands. Hajime wanted nothing more than to kiss Tooru right then and there.

And this time Hajime was the one staring blankly.

"Hajime I'm sorry I didn't mean it! Please don't hate me!" He said, panicked.

"Why would I hate you?"

"Never mind."

It probably would have made problems if Hajime had continued to ask so he let it be. He could only hope Tooru really meant it.

After that they stayed in the dorm half for a few more minutes before realizing how long they had been gone for and rushed back to the youth group room.

"I didn't know it took fourty-five minutes to use the restroom." The advisor deadpanned when they walked in the room.

The two apologized before walking back to their seats. Luckily, the advisor told them it was okay and that she understood because it was getting very boring anyways. She said that if it happened again our parents would be called. Hajime could only hope it was an empty threat.

But looking at Tooru, he could see the fear in his eyes, Hajime automatically knew that bad things would happen if Tooru’s parents were to ever find out.

At that moment he wondered if Tooru really was okay with Hajime sneaking into his house. Maybe he was just trying to make Hajime happy, or he didn’t know how to say no. Hajime had a feeling if he were to ask him that he wouldn’t answer truthfully but he didn’t want to see Tooru like that so all he could do was try.

It was nearing the end of the meeting and the advisor said that next week they’d be getting information about their first activity of the year, which was to be decided within the week and announced on Sunday in the announcements. After that they were dismissed.

Tooru and Hajime stood and faced each other.

“My mom’s probably here…” Tooru said, not meeting Hajime’s eyes. Hajime was never good at reading body language so he couldn’t decipher Tooru’s emotion behind it.

“I can walk you out? Ya know, since my mom’s probably here too…”

“I’d like that.” He said softly and grinned.

They started to walk towards the door and then Hajime realized: This is like walking your date to the door when you drop them off, and of course he started to blush.

Tooru tried to stifle his laugh but Hajime knew what he was doing.

“Hajime, why’re you blushing?” He finally looked at him.

“I’m not blushing,” Hajime said defensively.  And they both knew it was a lie and they both laughed at it. Hajime softly punched Tooru in the shoulder.

When the two got to the door they lingered for longer than necessary.

“So,” Hajime started. He decided he really needed to ask about the whole sneaking in thing. “Are you actually okay with me sneaking into your house?”

Immediately, Tooru’s face lit up, he looked at Hajime with bright eyes. “Yeah! I mean, it’s kind of scary and I am worried about getting caught but it’s worth a try because it’s you.”

That was music to Hajime’s ears. He took a deep breath. “Thanks, Tooru.”

“I’ll call you at some point and tell you when.” Tooru took a step closer to Hajime.

Hajime took a step closer to Tooru. “Good, I’ll be waiting.”

Tooru smiled and looked down and reached out his arms. What happened in a mere second happened in slow motion and Tooru was leaning in. Before he knew it, Tooru had enveloped Hajime in a hug, resting his head on Hajime’s shoulder.

It took a few second to click in Hajime’s mind that he was supposed to hug back, so he did. Tooru was so warm, the sweater he was wearing was fluffy and soft and Hajime just wanted to stay like that forever. It was more than just a hug, it meant so much more to Hajime, he could only hope the same for Tooru.

Tooru pulled away, it was all too fast. Hajime wanted to tell him to stay for longer but he knew he couldn’t. He’d just have to wait for the next opportunity.

They walked out together side by side, hands brushing as they walked. Tooru stopped.

“My mom’s that way.” He pointed to the right.

Hajime looked around until he spotted his own car. “Mine’s there…” He pointed left.

Tooru took a deep breath. “Well, I’ll talk to you later.”

“Alright.”

Tooru turned and started to walk away, he stopped after a few feet. “Thanks for tolerating me.”

Hajime just barely heard it. “Ditto.” He was grinning and Tooru kept walking.

A lot of things happened that night, it felt like a dream. Hajime wanted to live through it over and over again but of course now it was only a memory.

He waved even though he knew Tooru couldn’t see him and started to walk to his car.

Opening the door, his mother greeted him but Hajime wasn’t paying attention and just automatically responded.

_Thanks for tolerating me._

The thing about having a crush on someone right when you meet, is that you want to start the relationship right away. It’s straight to flirting, rather than “hi what do you like?” it’s “hi, what can we do together?” Craving their attention like no other, wanting you to be their only focus.

For Hajime, he was guessing he was Tooru’s only focus. He had no one else besides Hajime. He couldn’t decide if that was good for him or just sad.

When Hajime got home he went straight to his room. He laid out homework and laid his phone aside but all he could do was lay on his bed, thinking about Tooru, waiting for the time to come.

-

-

“HE SAID HE COULD _KISS_ YOU?” Bokuto spewed his drink. Hajime, Kuroo, and him had gone out to McDonalds after school so they could hear the full detail of Hajime’s night at youth group.

“AND YOU GUYS _HUGGED?_ ” Kuroo added.

Which yes, Hajime was very proud of and it was something to smile and scream about but he had to keep himself collected. “It’s not that big of a deal, guys.” He muttered, picking at his food.

“Yeah, okay.” His two friends were sitting across from him, doing the physical freak out for Hajime.

Pushing his food away, Hajime laid his head down on the table. “He’s supposed to call me at some point for me to sneak into his house.”

“And why are you not jumping up and down screaming, you should be ecstatic, like, jumping off the walls or some shit!” Bokuto said animatedly.

“I could never see you bouncing off the walls,” Kuroo interrupted. “But you should be happier than you look. You look more like you got dumped yet you’re only at the beginning of it all.”

He had a point, still Hajime couldn’t find it in himself to get “super excited” over it like Kuroo and Bokuto wanted him to. “I’ll be happier when he calls me and tells me to come over.”

Bokuto threw his hands up and forcefully slumped himself against his seat. “Unbelievable.”

“What’s boggling my mind,”

“Wow you said that.”

Kuroo paused and mocked a smile. “Is that you didn’t actually kiss him.” He picked up a fry. “That was definitely an “ _I actually really want to kiss you but I want you to make the first move_ ” moment.”

Hajime sighed. “Maybe next time.”

“You better stick to that.” Bokuto glared at Hajime, crossing his arms.

“Okay, mom.” This conversation wasn’t going the way he wanted it to. He didn’t know what he was expecting but Hajime didn’t want them ganging up on him. He stood up from the booth they were sitting in. “I’m leaving.”

“No,” Bokuto grabbed Hajime’s arm, stopping him. “You’re staying.” He got up and guided Hajime back to his seat, this time Bokuto sat next to him to prevent him from leaving. “Anyways, where’s that selfie I asked for?”

“You asked for a selfie?!” Kuroo grinned, a ghoulish look in his eyes.

Bokuto let go of Hajime’s arm. “Yeah, texted him last night and the little fucker didn’t text back.” He pointed his thumb at Hajime.

“Well, show us.” Kuroo pressed.

Hajime could feel his face heat up, of course he saved the pictures. He wouldn’t have dared to delete them. Though he wasn’t sure if he was ready or not to show Tooru to his friends, he didn’t know why; maybe it had to do with the fact that they’d probably go crazy and try to push him even harder to make a move on the guy he obviously wanted to take it slowly with.

“I’m gonna, like, cry if you didn’t take the picture.” Bokuto pouted.

“Fine, whatever.” Hajime said bluntly as he reached into his pocket to grab his phone.

As soon as it was out, the phone disappeared from his hands. Bokuto was holding it, pressing the home button.

He went wide eyed. “IT’S HIS FUCKING BACKGROUND, KUROO.” Bokuto screamed, turning the phone in Kuroo’s direction.

“ _WHAT?_ ” Kuroo and Hajime said in unison.

The two looked at Hajime confused. “Why are you saying what?” Kuroo asked.

Hajime covered his face with his hands. “I literally haven’t looked at my phone since the pictures were taken, Tooru must’ve done it when he went on his picture marathon.” He groaned, sliding his hands down his face.

Bokuto and Kuroo went back to looking at the phone.

“He’s cute, I’ll give you that.” Kuroo pointed out.

Bokuto gasped. “Hajime Iwaizumi, are you blushing in this picture.”

“Woah, woah, wait let me see that again.” Kuroo grabbed the phone. “Damn, I didn’t know you were even capable of blushing, I thought you were just a ball of anger.” He laughed to himself.

There was no point in trying to get it back now, it was going to be a while.

Finally, one of them slid the unlock button and entered the password, he didn’t know when they had figured it out.

“How many did you take and why are some of them blurry?” Bokuto asked, looking at each one.

Hajime sighed. “I was taking too long or some shit so he took the liberty of pressing the button himself and then proceeded to steal my phone and taking eighty more.” Hajime leaned back in his seat.

“I can’t believe you fell for a guy that’s so energetic.”  Kuroo stated, looking at Hajime.

“That, or that this Tooru fell for someone like you.” Bokuto added.

Hajime scoffed. “What’s that supposed to mean.”

“You know what I mean.” Bokuto deadpanned.

It was true, Hajime knew he wasn’t the ideal person. Anyways, it didn’t really matter to Hajime, as long as Tooru was into him.

The three sat there bickering until Hajime’s phone started to go off.

“Who is this person and why are they calling.” Bokuto handed Hajime his phone.

“Holy shit.” Hajime grabbed it. “It’s Tooru.” He was hesitating.

“Well answer it!”

“But—“

“ _Answer it.”_ Kuroo turned the phone to him and slid the answer button, shoving it up to Hajime’s ear.

Bokuto stood and yanked Hajime up with him. “Go walk home or something, talk to him.”

Kuroo stood as well and the two guided Hajime out of the restaurant.

Finally Hajime came to his senses and actually said something. “He-Hello?”

“You’re hopeless, oh my god.” They shoved him out the door, closing it behind them and Hajime was left outside.

“Hajime?” Tooru said from the other line.

“It’s kinda early, aren’t your parents’ home?”  He questioned. Out of all things, Hajime didn’t want Tooru to get busted from a stupid phone call.

Tooru laughed through a sigh. “Yeah, but they’re outside doing yard work. I should be fine for a while.”

“Oh, okay…” Hajime bit his lip. “Was there something you needed?”

Tooru hummed. “Mmm, I  guess. Just wanted to hear your voice.”

Hajime recalled the last phone conversation they had, it practically started out the same way. So that means Tooru’s words still managed to make his heart stop.

He had to get this whole “nervous around your crush” thing under control.

“Oh!” He yelled. Hajime winced and pulled the phone away from his ear. “Also, I was thinking about your offer to come over here.”

Hajime waited but no more words came. “And..?”

He could hear Tooru taking a breath. “Okay, so my parents go to bed every night at ten—“

“Damn.”

“— I know, anyways my room is on the second story of the house, theirs is in the basement don’t ask me why, it’s a complicated story.” Another breath. “So, that being said, you’re free to sneak over any night as long as you’re quiet and comfortable with climbing up the side of my house.”

“Really?!” Hajime responded right away, exasperated.

“Really.” Tooru confirmed. “But, I get that you have school and all so—“

“That’s not a problem, I’ll try to come as often as I can.” Hajime was smiling so big, he wondered if it showed through his voice.

Tooru laughed. “Thing is, I don’t know how you’re gonna get up here.”

“Wow, you’re an asshole, could’ve told me that beforehand.” He ran his free hand through his hair, not that there was much.

There was a lot of things that Tooru Oikawa did that was adorable that Hajime knew about, giggling was not one of them. Tooru was literally giggling.

He calmed himself down enough to speak. “Been awhile since I’ve heard that one.”

And it had been. It was a new record. Hajime was pretty sure that almost every conversation he had resulted in him calling someone an asshole or whatever it may be.

“Damn…” He muttered. “Tooru, what have you done to me?” His voice ragged.

There was silence and Hajime thought he had hit a wrong nerve.

Tooru spoke. “Um,” His voice cracked. “Um, my parents are heading in now, so I have to go. I’ll give you my address—“

“I can come tomorrow?”

Tooru was pouting. “Aw, thought you would say tonight.”

“I mean I could…” Hajime trailed off. “Might be a little late though because my mom’s working late and she has the car, so…”

Tooru’s smile could be heard in his voice. “That works.” He paused. “Oh, and Hajime?”

“Hm?”

“I still haven’t forgotten your promise about taking me driving someday.”

He had done so well this phone call, not getting overly flustered once, but now his breath was knocked from his lungs and he started to cough.

“Oh my gosh, are you okay, Hajime?” Tooru asked, panicked.

Hajime hit his chest. “Yeah, everything’s fine.” He said with a raspy voice.

“An-Anyways,” Tooru laughed nervously. “My address.”

Tooru gave Hajime his address and he wrote it on his hand. He promised he’d be there at least by one in the morning, which of course Tooru pouted but Hajime just called him an asshole again and said it’s better than nothing.

He hadn’t noticed it before, but he was just walking in circles around the McDonalds the entire time. Hajime walked back to the main entrance and saw Bokuto and Kuroo through a window.

What they were doing, you couldn’t put a name on it. Hajime had no idea what it was, but it was them being them, the friends he enjoyed being around.

He debated waiting there and taking pictures of them for blackmail later, which he did, before he walked back in.

Once he sat down they were throwing question after question at him.

Finally, Hajime was able to answer without them interrupting.

“Long story short, I think I have a date tonight.”

-

-

From the moment he got home, Hajime waited impatiently for his mother to get home with the car so he could leave. That being said, he had a lot of time to think about how he would actually get into Tooru’s house.

It really sucked that he couldn’t just go through the front door; he wouldn’t even want to attempt that though. He thought about a ladder, but figured that’d be too big to carry around.

Finally he concluded that he’d just figure it out when he got there, which wasn’t the best idea but was the only one he could come up with at the moment.

From then on, practically all he did was stare at the pictures Tooru had taken on his phone. It made him sound obsessed and creepy, or did it? Who knows?

His mother got home around 12:30am, which was when his nervousness really set in.

Adrenaline from doing something daring, the thrill of the possibility of getting caught. The fear of the same thing. So many emotions were coursing through Hajime’s body, but they were all focused on the same thing: Getting to see Tooru Oikawa.

-

-

When Hajime had pictured Tooru’s house (not to say he did that a lot (he did)) he thought it would have been completely isolated on the country side. He was surprised to see that it was in a nice suburb with fairly large houses, well at least larger than Hajime’s, at the center of a court.

It didn’t take long to find the house either, considering it was the only house that had a cross hanging outside the door. Also, there was a light on the second floor on, which Hajime was guessing was Tooru’s room.

Hajime parked his car a few houses down and from there he walked. Outside the house there were plants everywhere and conveniently enough, there was a large tree right next to the house that lead onto the first story roof which in turn had Tooru’s room connected on top.

He situated the bag on his shoulders and started to walk through the grass to the tree.

Hajime grabbed hold of one of the branches making sure it was sturdy. “This is so fucking cliché…” He whispered under his breath as he started to climb the tree.

Now, it had been a few years since the last time Hajime actually climbed a tree. He used to be fairly good at it but now… not so much. His feet kept slipping, he kept grabbing hold of the wrong branches, so many things went wrong. There were also his nerves to blame, those were doing him absolutely nothing except helping him fail at his attempt to see Tooru.

Finally after a few tries he had made it up. He stood on the roof hunched over trying to catch his breath. You’d think his volleyball training would have proved him better.

He started to walk towards the window when it opened up. Startling Hajime, he almost fell off the roof but smoothly caught his balance, able to make himself not look like a total moron in front of Tooru (That was a lie.).

From the other side of the window, Tooru shushed him as he reached out his hand to pull Hajime in.

It was an unnecessary action but Hajime took it anyways because he was a stupid teenager trying to get with his crush.

As soon as Hajime was sturdy on his feet inside Tooru’s room, before he could even look around, Tooru was clinging to him with a hug. Of course, Hajime hugged back.

“Someone missed me.” Hajime whispered through a laugh.

Tooru pulled back. “Well duh, I wouldn’t have asked you to come so soon if I didn’t.”

He hadn’t even been in the house for five minutes and Tooru already had him blushing.

“New record,” Tooru smirked. He tore away from Hajime, much to his dismay, and took a few steps back. “You’re already blushing.”

Hajime groaned, sliding his backpack off of his shoulders to hold with his hands. “Don’t rub it in you shit.”

“I am impressed, you’ve come up with a whole new insult.” Smirk still apparent on his face, he walked across his room.

The room was fairly large, had its own bathroom too. The walls were painted a boring light-tan color which were bare, save for a cross hanging up next to his closet on the right side of the room, leaving the room feeling empty.

“Many more where that came from.” Hajime retorted. Though, he wasn’t exactly paying attention, still just looking around the room trying to find something that screamed “Tooru”. Sadly, he was having no luck, the room looked like they had just moved in. “Random question.” Tooru cocked his head to the side. “How long have you lived here?”

“My entire life.”

Which, wow, left Hajime confused. You’d think a room would have a more cozy-homie feeling after being lived in for seventeen years.

“Anyways,” Tooru clapped his hands together walking over to his bed, taking a seat on his queen sized mattress with light blue sheets. They were literally the only non-boring color in his room. “What do you want to do?”

Subconsciously, Hajime followed Tooru to the bed, sitting right next to him despite all the extra room. “Well,” He pulled his backpack into his lap. “I brought my laptop, some movies, video games, cards, name something and I probably have it to be honest.”

Tooru laughed lightly and reached over to Hajime’s bag to take a look for himself. “Hmm…” He immediately went for the movies, pulling out a few. “I’ve never seen these before.”

“Tell me, what movies have you actually seen?” Hajime deadpanned. It was kind of a harsh thing to say, but he was hoping Tooru wouldn’t take it offensively.

“So mean!” He smiled, looking at the separate titles. “But yeah, you’re right. I’m not exactly allowed to watch movies that aren’t rated G or PG.”

The life Tooru was forced to live was very sad and uneventful. Hajime was surprised Tooru turned out as upbeat as he is.

Tooru picked up Fight Club (Hajime’s personal favorite) and started to read the back. “That’s my favorite movie.” Hajime decided to say.

“Does that mean you were hoping I’d pick it?” He grinned, flipping it over. “I’ll admit, it looks interesting.”

Hajime pulled out his laptop, setting it on Tooru’s bed. “Oh it is, it’s so mind fucking, too. I think you’d like it.”

“Or are you just saying that so we’ll watch it?” Tooru nudged Hajime on the shoulder.

“No! This is literally a really good movie, just…”

Tooru stuck out his tongue. “Oh just put it in, I was just teasing you.”

That phrase taken out of context could have been very dirty and something Hajime shouldn’t be thinking about but he did anyways. What else was a teenage boy to do. “Right.” He could feel his cheeks starting to heat up.

Hajime put the movie into the computer after turning it on. He sat there waiting for it to read the disk after he put it in while Tooru was doing something or the other behind him. When he finally had it all set up he turned to find Tooru rested up against the bed frame with propped pillows, and right next to him were other propped pillows that Hajime could only hope were reserved for him.

Tooru smiled lightly and tapped the spot right next to him. “Come on, come sit with me.”

Once again, this little shit had Hajime blushing like an idiot. But he did as requested anyways.

At first it was one of those comfortable distances that people just sit at on instinct, but gradually they scooted closer and closer until Tooru was practically laying on Hajime.

“Does your bed always move everything to the center?” Hajime asked. It was meant as a joke but his tone didn’t seem very convincing.

“Yup.” Tooru sat there facing him, grinning like an idiot.

Right after that, Tooru kept fidgeting around, until he had his head laying on Hajime’s chest, arm across his stomach. And Hajime couldn’t believe it, but _they were actually fucking cuddling._

Of course, Hajime had to concentrate more on avoiding his thoughts to head down south because that would become dangerous territory. He couldn’t say he hated the cuddling part though.

When you first look at Hajime, you see this pissed off bastard who hates everyone, when in reality he’s just bad at talking to people and likes physical contact. Which, were two things Tooru understood. Hajime didn’t even think Tooru was aware he knew about Hajime’s preferences and quirky traits, but it came so naturally to him. Hajime just guessed it was because he was a people person in general.

Which once again brought back the feeling of how sad he was that Tooru was locked away from society. He would do so great, could even become a public speaker.

“Hajime,” Tooru looked up and Hajime looked down to meet eyes. “Your heart’s beating really fast.”

“Shit, um, sorry?” He sputtered out. What else was there to say to that?

“Nah, it’s cute, I just felt like pointing it out.” And just like that, Tooru turned around to continue watching the movie. It really boggled Hajime’s mind that Tooru could say such things and just go back to normal while Hajime was left as a blushing mess who could barely form sentences anymore.

Surprisingly (not really), when the sex scene came up, all Hajime could think about was Tooru in those positions. He could only imagine Tooru moaning his name and more dirty things he shouldn’t have been thinking about. Hajime felt so disgusting for thinking these things, even though that didn’t stop him. Hajime was so absorbed in watching it that he barely heard Tooru start talking.

“I can’t believe you’re making me watch porn, Hajime, if you wanted to get in my pants so bad you could have just asked.” He didn’t even look up.

Then and there, Hajime wanted to lean down and kiss him and, yes, get in his pants. Nonetheless he just sat there, wide-eyed, staring at the top of Tooru’s head. He was probably just being sarcastic, which is what Hajime told himself but there’s only so much convincing you can provide yourself with.

Finally, he heard Tooru let out an unsteady breath and he looked up. “I-“ His entire face was turning red, even spreading down to his neck. “I’m sorry, that was probably weird, I shouldn’t have said that. I get carried away sometimes…” And with that, Tooru tore away from Hajime, leaving a good few inches in between them, which was how they spent the rest of the movie.

Hajime wanted to make attempts to tell Tooru that it was okay and that he wasn’t upset but he felt like if he did, Tooru wouldn’t believe him.

That, and if he said it was okay that may have made Tooru feel weird. All he hoped for was that they’d be okay by the end of the night, Hajime really didn’t want to leave off on an awkward note.

When the credits came up, Hajime shifted to shut his laptop, all was quiet.

The air felt stiff, he didn’t know why such a small comment was causing such a big, awkward predicament.

Hajime pulled out his phone to check the time. “Oh man, it’s almost three in the morning…” He muttered.

Tooru crinkled his nose, staring down into his lap. “If you want to leave, you can.”

“Do you want me to leave?” He asked.

Tooru hesitated before sitting up straight. “Well I don’t want you to be tired for school or anything.”

Hajime scooted closer to Tooru, not as tight together as they had been before, but closer than how the spent the last half of the movie. “For all I care, I could skip tomorrow.”

“Hajime, I couldn’t make you do that, also what about the car, won’t your mom need it?”

“But—“

“No buts,” Tooru sighed. “Just go home, Hajime.”

He sounded somewhat irritated, Hajime felt bad. “Don’t be such an asshole, I’m just trying to spend time with you!” Which was a little out of line, it wasn’t a big deal yet Hajime was freaking out about it.

“Jeez, I thought you called me that as a joke.” This time he actually did look angry and that’s when Hajime knew he fucked up.

“Tooru, I’m sorry—“

“No, I’m sorry, I’m the one who made you feel awkward and uncomfortable.” Tooru stood up and began to pace around his room.

“You don’t need to be sorry.” Hajime said calmly. Sometimes if he tried really hard, he could actually try to make people feel better.

Tooru laughed dryly. “Yeah? I screwed up, Hajime,” He put his hand on his forehead as he continued to pace. “I made a bad joke, I said it was okay for you to do things to me that shouldn’t be done—“

“Tooru—“

“No,” His voice cracked. “You must be disgusted.”

“Why would I be disgusted?” Slowly, Hajime stood up and cautiously walked over to Tooru. He wasn’t sure how close he was able to get.

Tooru turned away. “I’m not normal, Hajime.” It broke Hajime’s heart to hear him say something like that. “I look at things differently, if I look at girls, yeah cool it’s a girl, they seem to like me but I just can’t like them back.” And all came crumbling down. Tooru was degrading himself for something so minor, something that shouldn’t matter.

It made Hajime wonder what was being taught in the Oikawa household. If they were homophobic, he wasn’t afraid to go defend himself and Tooru, he’d do it in a second. The most awful part was, Tooru was scared. Scared to be himself, scared to even make a simple joke that should be over and finished with. Hajime couldn’t imagine how difficult it must be.

Right then, Hajime realized how appreciative he should be of his mother. Hajime’d never had a boyfriend, only kissed a few people, but he told his mother that he wasn’t in the slightest attracted to females and she was okay with it. Sure, that didn’t stop her from telling Hajime “you just haven’t found the right one” or “it’s just a phase”, but she at least wasn’t angry over it. He didn’t have to live in fear because of it.

“That’s not something to be ashamed of, Tooru, there are plenty of people like you.” Hajime was going to make Tooru feel better about himself whether he liked it or not, no one as wonderful as Tooru Oikawa should have to live in such shitty predicaments.

Tooru went stiff. “Really?”

“Really.”

“Tell that to my parents…” He took a shaky breath and all Hajime wanted to do was go over and hug him, it was like Wednesday night all over again. “They say it’s awful and that God will send those people to hell.”

“Well they’re wrong!” Hajime said loudly. “You’re perfect the way you are, Tooru! Your parents are shit-bags who don’t deserve to have such an amazing son, I’d kill to live with you. Heck, I’d spend the rest of my life with you!” He wasn’t even thinking, it just came out. But right after he said it, it sounded like Hajime was trying to propose to Tooru.

Tooru shushed him and turned to face Hajime. “I don’t understand you.” He said through gritted teeth.

Hajime froze still. He spread out his arms. “Are you trying to get me to treat you like shit or something? Because that’s not going to happen. If you want me out of your life just say so, you don’t need to try to get me to hate you just for that to happen.” It would crush Hajime, but if it was what Tooru wanted then he would do it.

“Hajime, I don’t know what I want.” He sighed.

Hajime swayed from foot to foot, thinking. “I should probably just leave, then, thanks for letting me come over.” With that, Hajime picked up his bag and swung it over his shoulder. He began to walk towards the window.

“Wait!” Tooru called after. Hajime turned around. “I want a hug…”

Hajime wanted to grin, though he knew now probably wasn’t the right time. The stubbornness in Hajime wouldn’t allow it. “You’re unbelievable, you know that?”

The sides of his mouth turned down, he was pouting. “You’re mean.”

And just like that, they were going back to their normal selves.

Hajime didn’t leave, but he didn’t walk towards Tooru either. He was waiting for him to make the first move, wanted to see if he’d do it.

Hesitantly at first, Tooru began to walk towards Hajime. He stopped a few feet away and Hajime took it as his cue to close the gap. What was seconds felt like minutes, Hajime wanted to think of it as a good thing.

When they finally came together, Tooru clung to Hajime, grasping the back of his shirt. Even though Tooru was the taller of the two, he still seemed like the little one. Hajime began to think it was because he didn’t grow up like Hajime did so he took it as his responsibility to make sure he was doing fine.

They stayed like that for about a minute before letting go. The only sound was them breathing and the occasional shifting their weight.

Tooru held onto Hajime’s shoulders. “Thank you, thank you so much for coming, you really are the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

He said these powerful words with such elegance and ease, Hajime didn’t even see it coming. He wanted to go in for another hug but decided against it, him being the way he is. It knocked the air out of him, you could say.

Hajime was so grateful for Tooru Oikawa, more than he’d ever know.

“Can you come back tomorrow?” Tooru asked quietly.

He caught his breath. “I can come back every night.”

The lights in Tooru’s eyes lit up, like stars in the dark sky. “I’d… I’d love that.”

Hajime grinned and Tooru grinned back and then he was heading out the window, Tooru waving him off. He snickered when Hajime almost fell down the tree and Hajime flipped him off but on the inside, he was laughing too.

-

-

In first period, Bokuto nudged a half asleep Hajime. “Hey.” Hajime made a noise in response. “How’d your date go?”

“Hm?” Hajime yawned. “Oh, it was really great.” He cracked a lopsided smile and laid his head on the table. Bokuto was laughing as he patted Hajime’s back.

A few periods later, Kuroo was asking him the same question which he gave the same answer to and spent the rest of the day sleeping in his classes.

-

-

Over the course of the next few days, Hajime spent every night from one to four in the morning at the Oikawa household. He always came with a plethora of movies and games and each time Tooru picked a movie, they ended up in the same scenario: Cuddled up all warm and cozy. Except this time, when Tooru cracked a joke, they weren’t taken as awkward, but actually laughable. But you could see it in both of them, they actually meant it, they just didn’t want to admit it.

Hajime really enjoyed it over there. In fact he told Tooru he was going to bring posters and everything to decorate his room to suit him better. Tooru would tell him that he “doesn’t need to help his charity case” which Hajime would respond with “I’m doing this because I want to and I care about you.” Which would shut Tooru right up with pink cheeks.

Saturday evening was the first time Hajime got off to the idea of Tooru. What scared him the most was that he didn’t need any videos or pictures, he could just imagine it. Which was when he realized how bad he actually had it for Tooru Oikawa.

It didn’t take much for Hajime to admit that he felt guilty about jacking off to the thought of the guy he had fallen for so hard. He couldn’t help it though, he was a teenager. Or at least, that’s what he told himself.

That night when he went to see Tooru again, something felt different. A strange awkwardness loomed in the air and Hajime felt like he wasn’t the only one causing it.

He didn’t put the pieces together there, but after he arrived home that flushed face plus sweaty fragrance plus lotion and tissues on the nightstand equaled that he had arrived at a bad time. Hajime got there earlier than usual and to say in the least, Tooru was looking a little panicked.

Hajime slapped himself on the forehead and fell onto his bed with all his weight when he came to the conclusion that Tooru wasn’t as innocent as Hajime thought he was. The sad part was, that it turned him on and the thoughts were back in his head and it was easy to guess what he did for the next few minutes.

-

-

Hajime ended up getting about a half hour of sleep before he was being waken up to go to church. He groaned and complained and it threw his mother off.

“Are you feeling okay, do you want to stay home?” She asked in that fake motherly voice.

Of course, that got him right up.  “No, I’m fine. I’ll be down in a second, mom.”

She muttered an answer that Hajime didn’t quite catch.

Quickly, he got out of bed and threw on the first thing he saw which happened to be a pair of jeans and a hoodie. They weren’t running late but Hajime wanted to get there early for obvious reasons. He wondered if Tooru was as tired as he was, he probably was.

“Why’re you in such a rush? We’re pretty on schedule.” His mother asked when he rushed into the kitchen.

He walked past her and to the front door to slip his shoes on. “I wanted to get there early.”

His mother was confused. “How come?”

“I think it’s pretty obvious,” He sighed. “You know I made friends with Tooru, I just wanted to hang out a bit before church started…” Hajime trailed off.

She hummed. “Alright, let’s go then.”

The skeptical look in her eyes said something Hajime couldn’t decipher. Like she was picking out things he hadn’t bothered to tell her and or didn’t want her to know in the first place. Nonetheless, she still grabbed her keys and left on cue.

-

-

The two found each other easily.

“Do we always have to with your parents?” Hajime asked after they had greeted each other. He could just sense that it was taking all of Tooru’s will not to hug him. Same could be said for Hajime himself.

They both had it so, so bad and it needed to be acknowledged. But, crushes fucking suck so it was like they were destined to have this tension between them that wasn’t necessarily uncomfortable but it was so present it hurt. Especially after the night before, which neither of them brought up.

Actually, Hajime didn’t even know if Tooru had figured it out or if Hajime was just making it up in his head. Maybe Tooru was just embarrassed over his own actions.

This subject was bound to end up fucking something up for Hajime. He was going to blurt out something he didn’t want to say or would make things even more awkward or even worse, distance himself away from Tooru.

“Yeah, they’re really touchy about this thing. I’m not sure what they think I’d do but it’s obviously something.” He sighed into a laugh. Tooru looked over Hajime. “Also, that hoodie looks really nice on you.”

Suddenly, Hajime was thankful for his shitty habit of grabbing and going. He felt awkward saying nothing back so he looked for something he could complement about Tooru. There were so many things, but all of them were things like _your face is beautiful and I want to kiss it,_ and _you’re so beautiful I could get off to the idea of you._ Oops, that one already happened.

Instead, he just blubbered like an idiot and blurted out a “thank you” where his voice cracked and Tooru started to genuinely laugh.

“Hajime, you don’t seem like the kind of person who gets flustered easily, yet here you are.” They had been standing in the middle of one of the aisles about three feet apart. Tooru took a step closer, grinning, and it took so much of Hajime’s will not to pull him in.

“You don’t seem like a smug asshole.” Hajime shot back. All he had now were his comebacks.

“Aw, really?” Tooru jutted out his bottom lip. “I thought I had that _innocent but deadly_ look to me.”

Hajime tapped his chin. “No, you have that _innocent church boy_ look to you.”

“Really? I wonder why.” Tooru covered his mouth, laughing. Hajime was glad that he could make a comment like that. He felt like if it had been anyone else they would’ve gotten extremely offended. Which lead to another reason as to why Hajime liked Tooru so much. He understood that when Hajime insulted someone it was him trying to show he cared.

There was a few seconds of silence before Tooru suggested that they go to their seats.

Hajime didn’t know what he was expecting, but the time went by just as it had the past Sunday. The whole touching at all times whether it be their hands or legs, just one part of their bodies together.

For once, mass went by in a flash, for whatever reason. Hajime just spent the time thinking, not even about Tooru, just everything in general. How content he was with what his life had become in such a short amount of time. When he first moved here he was angry and thought he’d hate everything, tried to hate everything, but now he was rethinking everything.

Heck, he didn’t even expect to make friends, yet here he was with the most supportive friends he had ever had, Tooru included. He had the privilege of calling his crush his friend, one of his best friends even. Before, he didn’t even know the definition of friends. Just thought the presence of someone meant that their friendship was real.

Before, Hajime was a sad excuse for a human, now it was like he actually had something, someone, to live for.

Tooru tapped Hajime, pulling him out of his thoughts. The announcements before mass ended had come. He briefly remembered youth group saying there’d be an announcement about an event happening.

“Attention youth,” The announcer said. “Our youth group is sponsoring a kairos within the upcoming month. It’s a small camping trip that will last five days, four nights, all are welcome we just ask that you are a part of our youth group, if you have questions, email addresses can be found in this week’s bulletin!”

At that Tooru perked up considerably. He turned to Hajime, grinning like the idiot he was and it was a beautiful sight. Something Hajime could stare at all day, he wanted to take a picture and frankly he didn’t think Tooru would be opposed to it.

The announcer continued on but after that bit Hajime stopped paying attention completely. Now his mind was on how we was going to be able to go on a camping trip with Tooru. He wondered how it worked, if they were going to be able to share a tent or cabin or whatever it may be.

He wondered if it’d just be the two of them.

-

-

When Hajime and his mother got home, automatically he started talking.

“So about the camping trip.”

“You want to go, don’t you?” His mother said, grinning, placing her keys on the table.

Hajime laughed through a breath, leaning back on the counter. “Yeah…”

She hummed contently as she pulled the bulletin out of her purse and took a seat. “Well, let’s at least look at it first.”

 Together they looked through the information, learning what it'd be like. Hajime would get to miss a few days of school excused, he was sure that was one of many perks.

What made Hajime the happiest was that his mother and him didn't fight at all while discussing the whole thing. Slowly, Hajime was building a better relationship with his mother and he knew that he was proud of that; he hopped his mother was too. That being said, once again Hajime was thanking the whole change of environment, what started as no perks now had more than Hajime could count. Most of them were thanks to Kuroo and Bokuto, the other half was thanks to Tooru.

He wanted to be one of those people who were friends with their parent(s), like could have a civil conversation and laugh together, he had made that one of his goals after realizing how much his mother really did for him.

After they finished discussing the matter, Hajime stood up and lingered for a moment. He opened his mouth to speak a few times, slowly working up his courage.

Finally, he did. "Thanks, mom," He said, leaning down to give her a hug. "You're the best."

She was stiff in the hug but that's what Hajime expected, considering before Hajime barely looked her in the eyes. After a second she settled from the shock but Hajime was already pulling away. She held onto him and pulled him back down.

"You're welcome, sweetie." She said, and it sounded like she was about to cry. Frankly this was the kind of crying Hajime could handle and welcomed. She let go after a second, probably assuming Hajime didn't want to be touched for long but the truth was, it was the opposite. Lately Hajime was all for physical contact, whether it be hugging or just a simple pat on the shoulder. It was strange. Or at least, it was for Hajime.

He wanted to say it was because of Tooru, and it probably was.

-

-

When Tooru told Hajime he was allowed to go on the trip, he wanted to jump up and down with joy. Instead he just went in and hugged Tooru.

Hajime had never been the one to initiate a hug, you could just tell from the look on Tooru’s face that that meant the world to him.

There was three weeks until the trip, to say in the least those weeks passed by with an excruciatingly slow pace. Though he couldn’t say they were bad days, like he had been doing he was going over to Tooru’s house daily(nightly?). In fact the day he was told he couldn’t go he just felt so incomplete.

That, and for once he’d get a decent night of sleep.

The day Hajime told Bokuto and Kuroo about the camping trip, they just about exploded.

It was the week before and Hajime was freaking out.

“Dude, how long has this been planned?” Kuroo asked as they sat outside after practice.

Hajime rubbed the back of his neck and swallowed. “A few weeks?”

Bokuto jumped in. “AND YOU AREN’T TELLING US UNTIL NOW?”

“ _Can you blame me?_ ” Hajime pleaded. This was stressing him out to no tomorrow. He knew that he should have told his friends prior to this moment but frankly it just never passed his mind. It was probably the lack of sleep. Hajime was getting one to two hours of sleep a night, minus the day he couldn’t go over. He was surprised he was still functional, nonetheless able to still play volleyball decently.

His school work was suffering though. Throughout the day Hajime was pretty sure he slept more than actually paying attention.

“I know, I know.” Bokuto waved him off. “You’re just putting a lot of pressure on yourself. But you know what? That’s what we’re here for, to bare some of your burden so it’s not weighing you down so much.” The sentimental look on his face spoke for itself, that Bokuto was genuinely saying these things.

“You’re so fucking cliché, Bo.” Kuroo cut in. “But yeah, he’s right, Hajime, we’re here for a reason.”

Hajime sighed. “I feel like you’re always the ones helping me out, I never do anything.” Which wasn’t necessarily true but it did feel like it.

“Shhh,” Quickly, Bokuto moved close to Hajime and grabbed his cheeks staring him right in the eyes. “Don’t say that, we’re not the ones living a fucking shoujo manga.”

Kuroo tapped his chin. “Wouldn’t we be living it, just more supporting characters rather than the protagonist?”

Bokuto turned to look at Kuroo. “Come on, Kuroo, I was trying to be cliché, as you’d put it.” The two started laughing and slowly Hajime started to smile.

“Thanks, guys.” He said quietly.

The two grinned from ear to ear and wrapped their arms around each other’s shoulders. “Hey, what are friends for?” Kuroo said, making a dramatic gesture with his hand.

Bokuto added, “We’re rooting for you, man.”

-

-

The day of the trip, Hajime barely got any sleep. Which wasn’t new, but still.

They still didn’t know how sleeping arrangements were going to be and could still only hope that they’d be able to pick who they shared with. All they had found out was that they’d be staying in cabins, four to one cabin.

Which gave Hajime hope that him and Tooru would be able to be at least together. Hajime had grown so used to just casually touching Tooru because usually they were just in Tooru’s room. The times he was at church or youth group Hajime found particularly difficult not to lay on his shoulder or whatever it may be. It was a bad habit that was probably going to hurt him some time in the future but at that moment he was just some ignorant boy who had one goal on his mind, which was to be with Tooru as much as possible.

The night before, Hajime and Tooru had decided Hajime wouldn’t come over prior to the trip. They were due to leave around five in the morning, which wasn’t far from when Hajime would usually leave, they declared it as too much of a risk. Hajime couldn’t say he was disappointed, he had five full days to look forward to.

The bus they were going to take was huge. It had a bathroom, comfortable seats, even small televisions, in short, the trip was promising from the start.

Hajime eagerly waited for Tooru to arrive so the two could settle on the bus, but of course that felt like hours. He had a feeling that his parents were going to wait until the last possible minute to get there so that they wouldn’t have to be away from their dear son for so long. That, or they didn’t want him to be with Hajime for as long. Or both. Probably both.

He had realized that Tooru’s parents were starting to catch on to their suggestive themes while sitting together at church. Which was why they had refrained from hugging there. Or at least, that’s why Hajime suggested it. To his knowledge, Tooru was still oblivious.

That being said, Tooru and his parents pulled up five minutes before departure. Surprisingly, Tooru wasn’t as lively as he usually was. Hajime had never seen him in the mornings but judging by this, it was easy to tell that Tooru Oikawa was not a morning person.

Though, that didn’t stop him from perking up a bit when their eyes met. Just the shine, the small smile, was all Hajime needed to know that that was the guy he liked.

Tooru said something to his parents before grabbing his bag out of the trunk and rushing over to Hajime.

“Hajime!” He said, hulling his bag behind him.

Hajime ran over to help. “Hey.”

Tooru let go of his bag and stood up straight, he looked at Hajime. “You didn’t even come visit me last night and all you have to say to me is _hi_?” He actually managed to look hurt, almost convinced Hajime he was.

“Oh come on,” Hajime, too, let go of Tooru’s bag and stood up straight. “It was a day, barely a day.”

“Barely-a-day too long!” He scrunched his eyebrows and placed his hands on his hips like a mother would when she was mad at her child. “I missed you.”

Hajime sighed. “What’re you going to do if I ever go on a vacation or something?” Not that his mother and him had the money.

“You’d sneak me along with you, right?” At this, Tooru started laughing. He knew how ridiculous he was being.

“Maybe if you could fit in my suitcase.”

“Are you _implying_ something, Hajime?” Tooru bent down to pick his bag back up. “We can find out if I do fit once we get to camp.” He scoffed before walking off to the bus to put his luggage in the storage unit.

Hajime rolled his eyes and followed.

After a few minutes, Tooru’s parents were calling him back, for what Hajime guessed was to say goodbye. He checked the time on his phone to see that they were actually about to leave, so he went off to find his mother.

Their goodbye was awkward, because before he probably would have mumbled something and have been off. This time, he went in to hug her and everything.

Of course, she ate that up and made a big deal about it, but that didn’t make Hajime want to take it back in the least.

Hajime walked back to find Tooru’s parents handing him a piece of paper. He had no idea what they were talking about but they had somewhat stern expressions plastered on their faces. Even Tooru looked uncomfortable.

In the end, they ended up giving him awkward half-assed hugs and were off.

As Tooru came back, he folded the paper and shoved it in his pocket.

“What was that all about?” Hajime asked.

“Oh,” Tooru glanced back. “It was nothing, let’s just get on the bus.”

Hajime chose not to question it, telling himself that Tooru would say something if it was bothering him. So, Hajime followed him to the bus where they boarded and sat next to each other in the back corner.

Not long after the bus was on the road, Tooru was leaning on Hajime’s shoulder, asleep. Hajime had never seen him sleeping but looking at him now was one of the prettiest sights he’d ever seen.

Soon after, Hajime was laying his head on top of Tooru’s, falling asleep and waiting to arrive at the camp.

-

-

It wasn’t Hajime who woke up suddenly.

No, it was Tooru.

But it was Tooru’s head that was being shot up, causing his head to push straight up into Hajime’s jaw. It was not a fun experience, 10/10 would not recommend.

“ _Fuck._ ” Hajime turned away, holding his jaw.

Tooru stood up quickly, flailing his arms, making a bigger deal than it needed to be. “Hajime, I’m so sorry! Are you okay? Do you need a nurse? It just happened so suddenly, just, the bus stopped and-!”

“I’m fine, Tooru.” Hajime waved him off and stood up as well. He looked out the window to see that they had stopped at a camping site, which Hajime believed to be their destination.

“A-are you sure?” He asked, stepping out into the aisle way.

He followed suit and the two began to travel to the front to get out. “Yeah, I’m perfectly fine.”

When they were out of the bus, Tooru started doubling over with laughter. “Then you should have seen your face oh my gosh!”

It was actually kind of cute, but Hajime couldn’t let himself submit to that at the moment. “Wow, my jaw is really starting to hurt now, I think it’s broken.” He said, monotone, dripping with sarcasm.

“That’s not funny!” Tooru stopped laughing and stared at Hajime with an angry look, but one of those angry looks that wasn’t actually angry but playful.

Hajime could feel a smile surfacing. “It’s kinda funny.”

He scoffed. “Whatever. I’m getting my luggage.”

Tooru stomped away to where they were handing out the luggage, of course Hajime followed him and received glares in response but that just made him want to laugh more.

After everyone had their belongings, the supervisor headed to the front of the group and called everyone to attention. “Alright, so rooming arrangements. There will be four to a cabin,” She flipped through some papers. “But there will be one with just two, due to our numbers. Are there any volunteers?”

Hajime perked up the moment she said it. Automatically he was raising both his and Tooru’s hands. Everyone seemed content with the decision, so it was final, Tooru and himself were going to have a room to themselves.

After that, the rest of the group paired up in fours and were assigned cabin numbers, Tooru and Hajime got cabin four. Then they were told a few extra details like meal times and when they were going to meet next, which Hajime just briefly paid attention to.

When they were told to go find their cabins, Tooru grinned at Hajime and lead the way, Hajime could only follow.

Their cabin was fairly small. Though, theirs had extra room since there were only two of them. The room consisted of two bunk beds and a nightstand, nothing more, nothing less. There wasn’t even a lantern.

“So, which bed do you want?” Hajime asked, setting his suitcase in one of the corners of the room.

Tooru hummed and glanced around. “I don’t really mind, I just want a top bunk so unless you want a top bunk too, I’ll just sleep above you.”

Hajime gulped. “Yeah, of course…” He felt his throat getting dry.

He ended up picking the bunk on the left side of the room when walking in. Hajime unzipped his suitcase and pulled out a pillow and threw it on the bed, followed by him awkwardly sitting.

All he could see of Tooru was his legs as he stood on the ladder, situating everything on his bed. It was then when Hajime started to realize how nice Tooru’s legs were. They were hairy but looked smooth nonetheless, Hajime wanted to touch them.

He mentally slapped himself, telling himself not to be such a creep. Hajime wondered if he’d actually have to worry about the rooming arrangements and if rooming with two more people would have been a better idea.

It was too late to back out now, though. Who knows, this could bring some wonderful opportunities, which was what Hajime was telling himself.

Tooru climbed down from the bunk and plopped himself next to Hajime. He laid back and covered his face with his arms. His shirt raised up a little bit, starting to reveal his stomach.

Hajime was just seeing so much skin today.

He didn’t realize he was staring until Tooru said something. “Hajime, what’re you staring at?” He asked, revealing his eyes.

“Uh-“ He stuttered and quickly looked away. “Nothing...”

Tooru laughed and rolled in Hajime’s direction onto his side. “I wouldn’t be angry if that’s what you’re thinking.

He quickly sat up with his head uncomfortably (not really) close to Hajime’s. Which was when Hajime just so happened to turn his head to look back at Tooru.

There they were, looking at each other dead in the eyes, expressions unreadable. None of them moved, just eyes darting back and force trying to decide which one to focus on.

Finally, Hajime told himself that this was his moment and he was going to take advantage of it head on, hoping Tooru would be welcome to the whole situation.

As he leaned in, Tooru closed his eyes. They were so close, like, a centimeter apart, when they heard a voice through a megaphone to call the group together.

Quickly, Tooru pulled back and stood up from the bed, he covered his mouth and laughed nervously. “We better head out.” He pointed to the door and walked towards it, going out on his own.

Hajime thought he would at least wait for him, but with what had just about happened, Hajime didn’t blame him. Frankly, Hajime probably would have done the same thing if he were in Tooru’s situation.

It was embarrassing, also disappointing. They were so close, so close to what Hajime had been working so hard for, just to be ruined by a mere second that came too soon. If it had waited just a bit longer then everything would have been fine, maybe they would have kissed and just kissed through the sound. But, of course, that didn’t end up happening, just Hajime’s luck.

The worst part was, he couldn’t tell if Tooru was relieved or just as embarrassed as he was by the whole situation.

Nonetheless, Hajime couldn’t dwell on the matter so he got up and followed Tooru to the gathering place.

Their scheduling went like this:

 **7:00 – 7:30am – Wakeup/role call**  
**7:30 – 8:30am – Mass (chapel)**  
**8:30 – 9:30am – Breakfast (mess hall)**  
**9:30 – 11:30am – Free time**  
**11:30am – 12:30pm – Bible study (event room)**  
**12:30 – 1:30pm – Lunch (mess hall)**  
**1:30 – 3:30pm – Trust exercises (picnic tables)**  
**3:30 – 5:00pm – Service work (event room)**  
**5:00 – 7:00pm – Games (in front of event room)**  
**7:00 – 8:00pm – Dinner (mess hall)**  
**8:00 – 9:00pm – Bonfire (Bonfire pit)**  
**9:00 – 11:00pm – Free time**  
**11:00pm – 7:00am – Lights out**

It actually wasn’t as bad as Hajime thought it would be. It wasn’t like a lot of it required full attention so he was wondering how many things he could just skip, or just pay attention to Tooru instead.

The two sat next to each other with a bit of space in between as the supervisor spoke, giving rules and guidelines. Hajime wasn’t listening, he was looking at Tooru.

He felt as if this was the pants joke all over again. Except this time he couldn’t just leave.

The current time was 8:30am so they were told to head to the mess hall for breakfast. Everyone got up and moved sluggishly to the place with mummers of conversation. Tooru and Hajime walked side by side but didn’t speak a word. He wondered if he should say something or just let it play out. But, that decision could wait until after breakfast.

Breakfast passed in due time and they were sent off to free time. The supervisors told them about a shed next to the mess hall that contained various sports balls and other outdoor games.

When Hajime heard sports balls be automatically wondered if there was a volleyball and wondered if he could play with Tooru to try and settle the tension.

While they were still talking, Hajime tapped Tooru’s shoulder and leaned over. “Hey, want to play volleyball?” He whispered.

Tooru knitted his eyebrows. “I can’t- I don’t know how to play.” He responded.

Hajime shrugged and answered back, “I can teach you, it’s no biggie.”

He knew they were going to be fine when Tooru grinned and nodded excitedly, glancing in Hajime’s direction. The only part that threw him off was that when Tooru dared to glance at Hajime, their eyes met and he’d turn away with a red face, like it was something that wasn’t supposed to be happening.

When they were freed, Hajime followed the herd out the door and wandered to the shed they spoke of. He had to rummage around a bit before finding a volleyball but he did find one. It wasn’t in the best of shape but it was a volleyball nonetheless.

He came back to Tooru drawing with a stick in the dirt, it looked like some sort of alien head.

“What’re you drawing?” Hajime asked, hovering over Tooru.

Tooru was startled and fell back against Hajime’s legs. He would have collapsed if it hadn’t been for his anticipation.  Tooru glanced up and looked at Hajime. “It’s an alien.” He smiled. _This nerd…_

They held their stare for a second too long before Tooru jumped up.

Hajime took a few steps back. “Okay, so I’m going to bump the ball to you, you just bump it back.”

Tooru knit his eyebrows but nodded. He held his hands together but laced his fingers.

“Not like that.” Hajime critiqued. He held up his own hands to show Tooru. Again he placed his hands together incorrectly. Hajime sighed and set the ball down, walking towards Tooru. “Here, like this.” Hesitantly, Hajime took hold of Tooru’s hands and placed them together properly.

“Ohhh, okay,” Tooru smiled. “I get it now, thanks, Hajime.”

“It’s,” His voice cracked. “It’s no problem.” He cleared his throat and distanced himself as he had before. Hajime threw the ball up and bumped it to Tooru, who bumped it back surprisingly well. “Good job,” Hajime smiled as he bumped it back again.

This time it was a little too high and Tooru hit it like a piñata.

When it came back to Hajime, he caught the ball. “Alright, so when it’s high like that you’ll want to set it, or at least back up a bit so you can bump it properly.”

Tooru looked at him blankly.

“Have you really never seen anything that has to do with volleyball?”

“I have, but I don’t know terms or anything…” Tooru itched at his face with a small smile.

“Alright, well,” He set the ball down again and raised his hands into a setting position. “You want to hold your hands like this and push it with your fingertips.” Hajime picked up the ball and set it to Tooru who caught it. “Like that.”

Tooru nodded again and threw the ball up to set it. It wasn’t a perfect set but it was good enough for someone who had just learned. Hajime bumped the ball back and the two hit the ball back and forth for a good amount of time before Tooru finally missed.

Tooru chased after it and came back, breathing heavily. He wiped his forehead with his arm. “You’re really good at this, Hajime.”

Hajime shrugged and waited for Tooru to toss it back. “I’m not all that great, I just have played for a while so,”

“Really? So you’re on your school’s team?”

“Yeah, I never told you that?”

“Guess not.”

He hit the ball back again. “Well, I am, I’m a wing spiker.”

“I don’t know what that is either,” Tooru caught the ball and laughed. “I told you, I don’t know terms.”

“Right,” Hajime said as he started to walk closer to Tooru. “Maybe I could teach you then?”

Tooru smiled. “I’d like that.”

The two ended up sitting down close to where Tooru’s alien drawing happened. Hajime picked up a stick and began to draw a court layout. He explained everything and drew all the positions, plays, anything, and Tooru paid attention with enthusiasm. At first, Hajime thought he was going on about all this stuff and Tooru was only listening because he didn’t want to be rude but then he started asking questions and Hajime knew he was genuinely interested. Once he realized that, he started giving more in depth answers.

“Woow,” Tooru said, astonished. “It would be so cool to be a setter! They’re like those people who are actually running the show, like the composer of an orchestra.”

Hajime grinned and nodded. “Yeah, that’s an interesting way to look at it.”

Tooru looked back at the diagram Hajime had drawn. “I really wish we had more people so we could have an actual game.”

Hajime turned. “That,” He poked Tooru’s nose. “Is a very good idea and we should get a group of people together when we have our next free time.”

Tooru put his hands over his nose defensively. “You really mean it?”

Hajime nodded.

“Let’s go see if there’s a volleyball court here then!” Quickly, Tooru stood up. He pulled Hajime up along with him and started dragging him off around the camp, volleyball left behind.

They did end up finding one. It was a beach volleyball court with sand that had sticks and twigs throughout the sand, probably a hazard. It was useable though.

When they stopped, Hajime bent over trying to catch his breath. Tooru didn’t stop running for anything, yet he didn’t look tired at all. He wondered what would happen if Tooru and Kuroo were to have some sort of stamina contest.

The court was somewhat out of view from the rest of the camp, hidden by trees sort of to the side. The beginning of the forest was close by so there were chances of balls getting lost but overall it was a decent enough court.

That was then Hajime realized, they were literally out of view from the entire camp. He mentally slapped himself for thinking about these kinds of things. It wasn’t like Tooru was going to submit to any of that stuff, or so that’s what Hajime told himself. Once again, Hajime was denying his chances with Tooru, that would only push him further away from his goals.

He needed to try, that was all. If Tooru didn’t want him, he didn’t want him, Hajime would accept that. Sure, he’d be a little disappointed, he was really putting himself out there. But he needed to respect Tooru’s choices.

Tooru waved his hand in Hajime’s face. “Hey, you’re staring at me pretty intensely. Is that drool I see?” He grinned and placed his hands on his hips.

“Oh shit, sorry,” Hajime responded, panicked. He went to wipe the drool off of his face. That was so fucking embarrassing, what could Hajime say to explain that? When he pulled back his hand it wasn’t wet with drool. He looked up at Tooru confused. “There’s no drool on my face…”

Tooru busted out laughing, he even started holding his stomach. “I got you good, you should have seen your face!”

Hajime frowned and closed the distance between each other. He took hold of Tooru’s shoulders. “You fucking asshole, you had me thinking I was making a fool out of myself!”

Slowly, a cocky grin spread across Tooru’s face. The look in his eyes spoke so many words. “And look at you now.”

Hajime went wide-eyed and let go of Tooru’s shoulders, backing up. He covered up his face as he began to blush.

“Hajime…” Tooru’s voice was full of… lust? “You’re so cute when you’re trying to be angry.”

That just made Hajime want to duck his head down even more. Maybe into the sand of the volleyball court, like an ostrich or something.

Tooru started laughing, almost like a cackle, Hajime still found it attractive.

Still covering his face, Hajime muttered, “Maybe we should start heading back.”

“Aw,” Tooru pouted. “But I’m having so much fun right now.”

“Yeah, _you_ are.” Hajime said, crossing his arms.

He deepened his pout. “Hajime’s angry?”

Hajime hesitated before responding. “That’s not what I meant and you know it.” He said, a frown starting to appear on his face.

Tooru was back to his grinning self. “Yeah, I know. I was just teasing you. Let’s go back.”

By the time the two made it back, it was about 11:20, ten minutes before their free time was over. They decided to head over to the event room and just wait until it was actually time.

Hajime thought bible study would be boring as hell.

He was wrong.

The instructors just told them what to do, that was all. They didn’t pay attention after that, just if it started to get too loud.

Tooru started off with actually doing the work, but then Hajime kicked him under the table. He turned and smiled, Hajime’s heart sped up.

How was he going to be alive by the end of the trip.

-

-

Hajime hated to admit it, but he was actually having a lot of fun. He got to stare at Tooru all day, hang out, talk, anything. Even the schedule wasn’t as bad as he originally thought. Most of the religious stuff took place in the morning, not to say that they didn’t try to tie in some religious lesson by the end of the event, or start each one off with a prayer, but it was something Hajime could deal with.

Their first day was coming to an end. It was successful, to say in the least. He remembered that in one of their upcoming free times Hajime had promised to get a volleyball game going, he saw his chance at the bonfire.

The group that they went with wasn’t too large, actually, maybe 40 kids? Overall, wasn’t a bad number.

When they sat at the bonfire they started with a prayer as usual, then they asked who wanted to comment on the day. He let a few others go before raising his hand.

Tooru stared at him strangely, because really, it was out of character of him.

“Hajime!” The counselor said with enthusiasm.

He cleared his throat and stood up. “Tomorrow in the free time after breakfast, Tooru,” He pointed at him. “And I were going to try and get a volleyball game started. Just putting that out there in case anyone was interested.”

There were some mummers, Hajime just hoped they were positive.

He was told that it was a great idea and was thanked before he was told he could sit down.

After he sat and they called on the next person, Tooru nudged him. Hajime turned his head. He wasn’t prepared to be so close to Tooru’s face. His breath was taken away, even though it was getting dark, he could still clearly make out all of Tooru’s features. He looked beautiful, a work of art.

Tooru looked just about as stunned as he was. After a second too long, they both put a reasonable distance between each other.

“Thanks for doing that…” Tooru mumbled, averting eye contact.

Hajime smiled, Tooru smiled back.

The bonfire was not a large place, they sat squished together, none of them complained.

Both were content.

-

-

As Hajime stood to leave the group, his name was being called.

“Yo, Hajime!”

He turned towards the sound and cocked his head.

Two boys jogged over to them. One had dark, short hair, just a tad longer than Hajime’s. The other longish, silvery hair. The feature that stood out most about him was the mole under his left eye.

“I’m Daichi, that’s Koushi, us and a few others would like to join your game tomorrow.”

Hajime smiled lightly and stretched out his hand for a handshake, which Daichi gladly took. “See you tomorrow.”

“They seem nice!” Tooru stated as they began to walk back to their cabin.

Hajime just nodded and looked up at the sky. It was already starting to get cold, he should have brought a sweatshirt.

Upon getting through the door, Hajime threw himself onto his bed, he lay there, hands behind his neck, looking up at the top bunk.

He felt weight at the bottom of his bed.

Hajime propped himself up on his elbows so he could see. Tooru sat there, looking at him. It was practically dark, the little light that shown through making him just visible.

They sat there looking at each other. Hajime felt like Tooru was about to say something, wanted him to say something, but no words came out.

He couldn’t tell if the silence was awkward or not, his mind was just going blank. Though he ended up coming to the conclusion that he could just look at Tooru forever and be content. Even if he could barely make out his features anymore.

Tooru took a deep breath. “Oh! I forgot I brought a lantern with me.” He stood up from the bed to go to his suitcase, Hajime heard zipping noises and then there was light.

It wasn’t exactly bright, but it was a decent amount of light, to the point where you wouldn’t fall on your face trying to walk around.

“That’s better.”

Hajime watched Tooru walk the lantern over to the nightstand, placing it there. His mind was still blank, he had no idea what to talk about.

Then Hajime was being pushed over, Tooru sitting next to him. “I hope you don’t mind me sitting here.” He laughed slightly.

“No,” His voice cracked. “Go ahead.”  Hajime was now hyperaware of everything around him, especially Tooru.

He eventually situated himself into a lying position, definitely not leaving space in between.

“Tooru… What’re you doing?”

Tooru laughed nervously. “I can move if you want me to, I just…” He trailed off, not bothering to continue the sentence.

Hajime’s breath caught. “You can stay.”

There was silence as Tooru just sat there. Hajime didn’t know what to do, the air was filled with tension and awkwardness, he just wanted something to happen already.

After a few seconds of just listening to each other’s breathing, Tooru started to move and laid down, head facing Hajime.

“Can…” Tooru hesitated. “Can I sleep with you?”

Hajime’s heart stopped. Was this a dream? This had to be a dream.

“Y- Yeah.” He choked out.

“I just, I’m not used to being away from home, you see…”

“I don’t mind.”

The two went silent and just sat there, if Hajime dared to turn his head to the side he’d be practically nose to nose with Tooru, he didn’t know how he’d handle that. Hajime knew he could be impulsive with his actions, he didn’t want that to happen with Tooru and end up ruining everything.

Nonetheless, Tooru ended up taking matters into his own hands. “Hey, Hajime,” He mumbled. “Can you look at me?”

This was it, oh no, the make it or break it moment, the moment he could fuck up everything with a single movement.

He complied, though, situating himself to lay on his side and look at Tooru. He was right about being nose to nose, the two were so close Hajime could pretty much feel Tooru’s breath on his face. With the little light they had, Hajime made out the features of Tooru’s face. From what he could see, Tooru’s eyes were darting back and forth between Hajime’s lips and eyes.

What was he supposed to make out of that?

If this really were a dream, then Hajime could simply cup Tooru’s face, look him in the eyes and confess to him. Or he could just kiss him.

Yeah, he could do that and then he could wake up and he could have the memory but none of it actually happened so Tooru wouldn’t know and their friendship would be fine.

Hajime had this, he could do it, he was cheering himself on.

He took a deep, nervous breath, preparing himself for the worse as he lifted up his hand and cupped Tooru’s face.

Tooru’s breath stopped and he stiffened. Was he making the wrong choice or was Tooru just nervous too?

Hajime licked his lips, looking straight at Tooru.

Hajime started to lean in, Tooru closed his eyes, waiting. Their lips were just about on each other and—

_Knock knock._

Tooru jumped so much he fell off the bed with a loud thump. He quickly stood up and brushed off his pants, glancing at Hajime before wandering to the door to see who had so rudely interrupted them.

It was at the worst possible time too, Hajime just wanted to bash his head against the wall, they were _so close._

Tooru opened the door.

“Yes?”

“Ah, Tooru, right?” The voice sounded familiar…

“Mhm, and you’re Daichi and Koushi right?”

“Yup!” The other voice came in. “We were just wondering if you and Hajime wanted to come meet the other people who wanted to play in the volleyball game tomorrow? We could sort out teams now so we have more time to play tomorrow!” Koushi suggested.

 

“Ehh,” Tooru turned back into the cabin. “What’d’you say, Hajime? Want to?”

 

Hajime sighed, sitting up and going to stand next to Tooru. “Might as well, I guess.”

 

“Alight, just follow us then.” Daichi said, turning to lead them in the direction of the unknown people.

“All of us were hanging out in our cabin, that we share with our friends Asahi and Yuu, and then we got on the topic of the volleyball game tomorrow and I suggested we have you guys come and meet everyone. All of us play volleyball, actually on the same team, and from the same school.” Koushi laughed as he explained.

Their cabin wasn’t far from Hajime and Tooru’s, they were in cabin two. Daichi opened the door to reveal several others. The room was lit up nicely, plenty of flashlights and lanterns everywhere. Outshined their makeshift in a flash.

The others stopped abruptly, looking at the newcomers, most of them greeting Hajime and Tooru with smiles and waves while a few didn’t bother spare a glance.

Koushi stood in front of them, gesturing for them to walk into the cabin and sit. They complied.

“Alright,” Koushi clapped his hands together. “These two are Hajime and Tooru,” He pointed at them when he said their names. “Hajime and Tooru, these are Ryu, Yuu, Asahi, Tobio, Shouyo, Tadashi, and Kei.”

The two waved at the others awkwardly as Daichi and Koushi took a seat next to them.

“So,” Yuu looked at them excitedly. “How long have you guys been dating?”

Hajime nearly choked, he started coughing, eyes going wide.

“Woah, Hajime!” Tooru panicked. He felt his hands patting him on the back. “Uh.. We’re not dating…” Tooru muttered, sounding unsure of himself.

“Wait, really? Damn, you guys really look like a couple.” Ryu looked over at the two while Hajime starting to calm down from his coughing fit.

“That coming from the only straight guy.” Kei deadpanned.

“Wait, you all are gay?”

“Nah, Yuu’s bi, Kei’s ace, Shouyo and Tobio are pan, I am too.” Koushi said grinning.

“Why would we even come here, then, if we weren’t? It’s the only time we can spend time with our boyfriends without being hounded or having to be extremely secret. Hell, they’re stupid as fuck letting us stay in the same cabins.” Yuu laughed.

“Huh, I’ve never met anyone who isn’t straight before.” Tooru glanced around at the others with a smile on his face. It was no secret that he was nervous.

Hajime buried his face in his hands. _Yes you have._

That earned a few uneasy looks. Hajime was sure the others knew why he was hiding his face, which probably just made them even more uncomfortable.

Daichi spoke up, probably trying to help Hajime’s case. “I’m sure you have, you just didn’t—“

Tooru cut him off and took a big breath. “I’m relieved because I thought I was the only one…”

Hajime’s head snapped up, he stared at Tooru who was scratching at the back of his neck nervously.

“Only what?” Hajime asked, exasperated, his voice cracked. He had to make sure it was what he was thinking.

“Um,” He hesitated for a moment. “I’m gay?” It sounded more like a question, Hajime wasn’t sure what to do other than stare. He could feel his face heating up. It brought him back to the time they skipped youth group and the first night he went over to Tooru’s. He had heavily hinted at it but those words didn’t leave his mouth, even if Hajime knew anyways. “Hajime, are you okay? Oh my gosh, please don’t hate me…”

“Are you fucking kidding me? Why would I hate you? We’ve been over this, that’s something stupid to hate someone over,” He tore his eyes away in favor of looking at the floor.

They were probably creating a scene for the others; it wasn’t the best way to introduce yourselves.

“Have you _met_ my parents? They’d kick me out if I told them I was gay. Why do you think they keep me locked away from the world? It’s because they don’t want me to “get corrupted” or whatever,” He made air quotes. “Something about a gay person comes up on the news? “God hates fags, don’t become a fag, Tooru.”” Tooru was mimicking his parents, he was clearly getting worked up but Hajime didn’t know what to do about it. All he could do was stare with his mouth hanging open.

“Tooru—“

“They- They’d probably send me to some correctional facility or again, kick me out and I don’t have anyone I can go stay with because my grandparents already hate me and my parents don’t have any siblings and my sister lives far away and I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t want me there either.

“They can’t find out, they just can’t, I’d die if they did…” Tooru concluded. The face he was making Hajime sadly recognized, he was about to cry. Hajime had realized that Tooru often blew things out of proportion, but in doing that it made him panic.

They weren’t in the right place for this to happen. Hajime glanced up at everyone, they were all watching attentively, some averted eyes. He didn’t know what to do, but it wasn’t like he could ask for help because they didn’t know Tooru and how he worked. His mind was moving a mile a minute, trying to come up with something to say.

Finally, he reached over around Tooru, grabbing his shoulder and pulling him so he was leaning on Hajime.

“If that were to ever happen then you could come stay with me…” He wrapped his other arm around him, pulling him closer. “Anyways, I would never hate you… I’m gay too…” He muttered.

Tooru went stiff and pulled away, looking at Hajime.

Then there was clapping and they were snapped out of whatever they were in. They had forgotten that they were even with the others.

Kei sat there, clapping slowly, look undecipherable, Tadashi laughed and whispered something to Kei before joining him. Then the others were joining in too.

Hajime could feel his face warming up. “Sorry…”

“That was so cute, don’t be sorry!” Koushi said genuinely.

“Anyways,” A new voice, Tobio, spoke up. “Weren’t we supposed to sort into teams?”

“Tobio! Way to ruin a moment!” Shouyo whined as he shook Tobio’s arm.

Tobio scowled and looked at Daichi.

“Erm, right.” Daichi scratched his head. “You two play volleyball, right?”

“I do, I play wing-spiker.”

“I learned today, I’m not sure which position I am.” Tooru glanced around nervously.

Koushi smiled, his smile was radiant, the more Hajime looked at it the more he realized how calming and genuine it was. “That’s fine, we can do teams of five.” He placed his hand on his chin, beginning to contemplate. “How are we going to sort them though?”

“We can pick straws or something?” Tadashi suggested.

“That’s true, I’ll get some paper and write one or two on them and we can just pick from there.” Koushi stood up and walked over to a bag, which Hajime guessed to be his own. He picked out a notebook and a pencil. “Alright,” He said coming back to sit. “Let’s do this.”

Twenty minutes later, the teams were picked.

Team one: Yuu, Asahi, Ryu, Tobio, and Shouyo.  
Team two: Tadashi, Kei, Koushi, Daichi, Tooru, and Hajime.

He was lucky that Tooru and himself ended up on the same team, that way he felt that Tooru would be more comfortable with it.

After that was sorted out, Hajime and Tooru stayed in the cabin until it was time for lights out. Along with the others who didn’t belong in that cabin, they shuffled out, making way to their own.

Once back in their designated place they laid in their respective beds in the darkness. The silence was eating away at Hajime, he couldn’t sleep.

“Hajime?”

He had thought that Tooru was asleep. “Yeah?”

“How long have you known you were gay?”

“Um,” Hajime could feel his cheeks heating up, he was grateful for the darkness and bed in between them. “My entire life I guess? I didn’t know there was a term for it until I was, like, ten or something, though.”

After that there was silence. Hajime wondered what was going through Tooru’s mind.

“How many people know?”

“Mostly everyone, I’m pretty open about it, not that I go around flaunting it but if someone asks I’m not afraid to tell them I like guys. My mom was pretty chill about it but was still the “you’re just confused”, she’s slowly accepting it more though.”

“Oh.”

How was Hajime supposed to reply to this? Was Tooru trying to end the conversation? Hajime couldn’t tell. He continued to talk anyways. “Tooru, are you okay?”

Tooru laughed quietly. “No, of course not.”

He was stunned. That was not the answer Hajime was expecting. He was quiet for a few seconds, debating on what to say. “Hey, Tooru, will you come down here?”

“… Alright.” There was a hint of hesitation in his voice, nonetheless there was shuffling signifying Tooru’s movement. Hajime heard him jump down from the bunk and could feel his presence in front of him. “What is it?”

Hajime scooted over and moved away the blankets to make space. Even though Tooru couldn’t see him, he patted the spot next to him. “Lay with me.”

“What? Why?”

“Because I’m trying to be nice and you sound like you need a cuddle, now come down here before I change my mind.” It sounded better in his head, now he was just embarrassed. It worked though, because then Tooru was laying himself next to Hajime, hesitantly moving himself closer to him. Hajime awkwardly wrapped an arm around him.

“You’re not very good at this cuddling thing.” Tooru said quietly.

“And you can do better?”

Tooru began to move, adjusting their positions. “I can and I will.” He made Hajime lay on his back instead of side and then laid his head on his chest, wrapping Hajime’s arm around himself as he did the same vice versa.  “See? Better.”

Hajime wasn’t about to admit defeat, but it was a lot more comfortable. He decided not to respond.

It was quiet for a few minutes.

“Hey, Hajime?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you have a crush on anyone?”

“… I do.”

“Do I know him?”

“You do.”

“Is he nice?”

“He can be.”

“Are you gonna ask him out?”

Hajime could feel his heart beat speed up, he could only pray that Tooru couldn’t feel it. “I plan to at some point.”

“When?”

“Go to sleep, Tooru.”

-

-

Hajime woke up with Tooru still wrapped around him, greeted by a pool of drool on his shirt.

From what he could tell, it was morning. The sun was shining through into their cabin, everything around them now fairly visible without having to use a flashlight.

Hajime moved, carefully disentangling himself from Tooru trying not to wake him. He was just about there when—

_Knock knock._

“Rise and shine, time to get up!” Someone said from the outside.

That caused Tooru to abruptly wake up, throwing Hajime off and both fell to the floor with a loud thunk.

“God, ouch…” Hajime muttered, rubbing at his elbow that he fell on.

Tooru was staring at him with a smile, mouth twitching. Then he was laughing, clutching his stomach and throwing his head back.

“You’re really going to fuckin’ laugh about this?” Hajime chided, though a grin was starting to grow on his face as well.

He looked at Hajime, but it just made him laugh more. “Yup! Gosh, that was priceless. I wish I could have gotten that on video!”

“You little shit.”

Tooru pouted, looking at him with puppy-dog eyes. Hajime could feel his cheeks heating up, it was too early for this.

He stared at the ground and slowly stood up. “We should get going…” Hajime mumbled.

They suffered through the hour of church, Hajime was pretty sure he fell asleep because the only thing he could remember was Tooru telling him to get up for communion and then when they were saying “the mass is over”.

It wasn’t like he really cared, though. All he cared about now was getting to the dining hall for the food he had been deprived of for an hour.

Upon walking inside, they were already being signaled by Daichi, Koushi, and the others to go sit with them. Tooru grabbed Hajime’s wrist and practically dragged him over.

“— and then Tobio actually muttered “why do animals hate me?” in his sleep and Tadashi, Kei, and I laughed so hard it actually woke him up!” Shouyo finished just as they got to the table.

“Well it’s not a lie…” Tobio grumbled, staring into his lap with a disgruntled look.

“I just think it’s funny because your boyfriend loves animals and has like four.” Kei pushed up his glasses with a pleased smile.

“Right… Anyways…” Tobio looked up and locked eyes with Hajime. “How was your guys’ night?” He said, desperate for a topic change.

The others looked to Hajime and Tooru expectantly, he wasn’t sure what to say.

“Hmm, uneventful I guess, but the morning was just hilarious!” Tooru grinned. “So Hajime and I were cuddling—“ There were a bunch of “ooo”’s coming from the others, mostly Yuu and Ryu. “—Because I was sad, so we fell asleep that way right?” He continued. “Then come morning and someone’s knocking on our door to wake us up and I just bolt right up and knock us both out of the bed.”

All of them joined in with Tooru’s laughter while Hajime sat there, trying to hide his face in his hands. They continued to share stories, while that happened, Koushi tapped on Hajime’s shoulder. They were sitting next to each other.

“I thought you said that you and Tooru weren’t dating?” He questioned, just loud enough for Hajime to hear.

Hajime hesitated with his answer. “We’re not… I’m working on that… He’s pretty clueless.”

Koushi smiled. “Actually, I think he’s kinda smart, he just thinks you’re the oblivious one.”

 _He thinks_ I’m _the oblivious one?_

-

-

What Koushi had said stuck in Hajime’s head. It was all he could think about.

After the meal they all made way to the volleyball court, all of them went onto their respective sides and discussed with their team. They were split up pretty evenly, according to what Hajime heard both teams had setters and someone who specializes in receives, he was impressed.

It’d be an understatement to say he was worried about Tooru. Everyone on the court was a volleyball player, probably playing for most of their lives, and Tooru had just started. Even though he did well when the two were just passing back and forth, that was nothing compared to a match with experienced players.

The game started and Tadashi was up to serve. He didn’t look like much, but then he tossed the ball up and it was in play and it was one of the most elegant serves Hajime had ever seen. He wanted to stand there in awe but there wasn’t time for that in a volleyball match.  

Surprisingly, Hajime was the first to score with a toss from Koushi. They all yelled in triumph, congratulating him and telling Koushi and him good job.

It was a shock at how supportive their team was. Hajime’s teammates back home were great, but them… They treated each other like they won nationals or something. It brought comfort to Hajime, knowing that there would be people there to tell him good job. Even when someone screwed up they still had a positive outlook on it, telling them “don’t mind” and “you’ll get the next one”, they were like a family.

The score was 15-13, Hajime’s team winning. Each time Hajime scored, Tooru locked eyes for a second too long. Not that Hajime didn’t like it, but it was starting to distract him from his game sense.

It ended up that Hajime didn’t need to worry about Tooru at all. He still had a long ways ahead of him if he wanted to get good but he wasn’t bad for someone playing for the first time.

Then Tooru was up to serve, Hajime wasn’t paying attention because the next thing he knew his head was hit forcefully with a volleyball, pushing him into the net and then falling down into the sand.

“Hajime!” Tooru ran up to him panicked. The others started to come over too, but Koushi held up his hand for them to stop. “I’m so sorry, I must have hit it wrong or something.” His voice was still panicked and when looking up he was face to face with Tooru. Mere inches away, looking into each other’s eyes, though he knew Tooru was looking at him for a whole other reason.

It would be so simple to just pull him down and kiss him.

Hajime held the back of his head, sitting up. “First of all, _ow._ Second of all, you’re strong as hell what the fuck do you do all day?”

Tooru’s cheeks started to turn pink, he looked at the ground. “My mom makes me help her carry mulch and stuff for the garden…” He muttered. Changing topic, Tooru placed himself behind Hajime, like directly behind, so behind that they were touching. “Are you sure you’re okay?” Tooru began to run his fingers through Hajime’s hair in the spot where he had been hit. Probably searching for signs of injury but Hajime couldn’t help but think that Tooru playing with his hair was one of the best feelings in the world, even if his hair was relatively short.

“Yeah, fine…” Hajime confirmed quietly. He was actually starting to lean back into Tooru’s touch.

“Get a room!” Yuu shouted through cupped hands.

“Yuu!” Asahi scolded, which Yuu just looked at him and shrugged.

“Aha, anyways,” Tooru pulled back suddenly and Hajime instantly missed the contact. “We should get back to the game, since Hajime’s alright.”

-

-

Hajime’s team won 2 – 1, and the accident with getting hit happened more than just once.

It wasn’t that Hajime wanted it to continue happening, but he was okay with it because of the reactions he got out of Tooru. By the time the game ended, Hajime was pretty sure he was going to suffer from a concussion if he ended up getting hit another time.

That being said, around when the game ended, that’s when they heard that their free time was over and were to report to the events room for their bible study. He wasn’t sure if he was going to miss just being alone with Tooru, of course they still had their cabin though. Making their new friends was a perk beyond no end, especially for Tooru.  That being said, the things that he was so determined to hate he was beginning to like more and more.

-

-

The entire day just flew past, Hajime was actually surprised by how quick it seemed. Before they knew it, the bonfire was ending and they were being sent off to their last hours of free time for the night.

Within the day, Hajime and Tooru had learned so much about their new friends.

For one, all of them varied in grades. Daichi, Koushi, and Asahi were all seniors, like Tooru and Hajime. Yuu and Ryu were both juniors, and Shouyo, Tobio, Kei, and Tadashi were all sophomores.

It came as somewhat of a surprise to Hajime upon hearing all this. Not that they didn’t have a variety of people on his current volleyball team, but when he lived up north they had a team per grade and if you were seen socializing with someone in another grade you were practically disowned. He never understood it, but he was happy to hear that’s not what it’s like here.

Of course, they learned about their love for volleyball too, how Tobio and Shouyo were mostly the ones behind bringing the team out of the trash. It was amazing, learning about their special quick strike because it was so fast that he barely got to see it, nonetheless block it, during the match. Tooru was most amazed by Tobio’s technique, asking him to teach him how to toss like that. It was obvious that Tobio was honored and felt proud that someone wanted to learn from him but he denied it, which Koushi leaned over to Hajime to whisper, “he’ll probably give in at some point if he keeps asking, Tobio doesn’t really know how to deal with people.” Which, Hajime could see, he also got that vibe from Shouyo, the two together must be a real sight.

 They had known each other for about a day and already felt like they had known each other forever. He could only hope that this wasn’t a one-time thing, even if they were in the same youth group.

Once their free time was over, all were sent to bed.

Hajime lay in his bed, reminiscing on the day’s events. He wasn’t about to admit it, but he really wanted Tooru to come down and sleep with him again, maybe continue with what they had been so close to the day before.

Like he was reading Hajime’s mind, Tooru spoke up. “Hey, Hajime?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I sleep with you again?”

“Y- Yeah…” He stuttered.

Once again, Tooru was down in Hajime’s bed and the two were snuggled up together. Hajime didn’t feel tired whatsoever, he was quite awake. He wanted to talk to Tooru, but there wasn’t much to say and also, Tooru was probably tired.

Hajime planned out multiple conversations in his head, and one of them lead to them kissing in the end and unintentionally Hajime slapped his forehead muttering “stupid.”

Tooru picked up his head and turned towards Hajime. It was dark so he couldn’t see, but he did it anyways. “What?”

“Nothing…”

“Hajime, you can’t deny that from me now, come on!”

“I…” Was there a way to word this without sounding creepy? Or letting Tooru know that he liked him to the point where he was planning the conversations that would lead up to their first kiss? “I was just thinking…”

Tooru hummed, judging by the sound he was much too close, and as it continued he could just feel Tooru inching closer. “What were you thinking about?”

He was so close that Hajime could feel his breath dangerously close to his lips. “Uh,” He squeaked.

“Do you ever think about kissing the person you like?”

It was scary how spot on Tooru was becoming, especially since that would start to limit Hajime to what he could do in front of Tooru. “Yeah…” Hajime admitted. Tooru’s lips were now practically on his, he just had to lean his head up and then they’d be touching.

Tooru snickered quietly. “Am I that person?”

Hajime’s heart stopped, he could feel his face becoming hot while the rest of his body became cold. The tone that Tooru used was so suggestive that Hajime could’ve mistaken it for an advance, now was his chance to take advantage of the situation. All of his muscles were stiff yet he managed a slight nod, just enough for Tooru to get the message.

“Can I kiss you?”

Hajime gasped. “I thought you’d never ask.” He said exasperated, breath on breath.

Less than a centimeter away, Hajime held Tooru’s jaw and pulled him forward, connecting his lips to the ones he’d been dreaming about forever.

Tooru was surprised by the sudden contact, even though he was the one to request it, nonetheless he settled into it quickly. Hajime didn’t feel cocky to think that he was Tooru’s first kiss, it was pretty noticeable. Inexperienced lips glided across Hajime’s, yet still managed to fit the expectation, maybe even better.

Hajime moved his hand to the back of Tooru’s neck, playing with the short hair there as Tooru gasped into his mouth.

Tooru pulled away, both were breathing heavily. “I… I’d imagined what kissing would be like but this was so much better…”

“That’s just the beginning.”

Without warning, Tooru was pressing his lips to Hajime’s to resume what they had started. Hajime helped Tooru angle himself so that they weren’t in such an awkward position. Actually, he flopped their positions entirely, laying Tooru on his back and Hajime holding himself up as he leaned over Tooru. He wondered if it was okay to use tongue, considering it was their first kiss, Tooru’s first kiss in general.

Their pace was picking up and Tooru latched onto Hajime’s t-shirt in attempt to pull him closer. The kisses were becoming needier, but it was all Tooru doing it, even if Hajime complied. He thought about stopping him but then remembered what Tooru’s situation was. He guessed that if he had been deprived from human contact most of his life then he would take the first chance he got to the full advantage.

It then occurred to him that maybe Tooru was just using him because he was there and this wasn’t exactly something Tooru would have been able to do often.

Hajime pulled back but Tooru followed, still eager to keep the kiss going. Which, Hajime went with for a couple seconds until he remembered what he wanted to say and pulled away entirely, holding onto Tooru’s shoulders to prevent him from following again.

“What does this mean?” Hajime asked quietly, out of breath.

“I don’t know, I’ve never done this before!”

“Not the kiss, dumbass. Us. I’m asking about us.”

Tooru’s breath went silent, Hajime started to wonder if he had said the wrong thing.

“Well…” Tooru mumbled. “I’d assume it meant we were dating, or at least that’s what I want it to mean.”

A smile started to form on Hajime’s face as he leaned forward, whispering “me too” before he connected their lips once again.

-

-

Hajime woke up to the sound of Tooru’s voice.

“Did last night really happen?” Tooru was sitting up and rubbed at his temples. He hadn’t noticed Hajime was awake yet. “That really happened…”

Hajime blinked a few times before making the decision to snake his arms around Tooru’s waist.

Tooru jumped at the sudden contact. “Woah, Hajime! How long have you been up?”

“Like 30 seconds.” He yawned, nuzzling his face into Tooru’s side. “What time is it?”

“6:30.”

Hajime groaned, shutting his eyes tightly. “Why’re you up so early?”

“I had a weird dream, you were in it.”

“Tell me about it?”

“No!” He said loud and immediately.

Hajime picked his head up. “How come?”

Tooru hid his face in his hands. “Because it’s embarrassing and you’ll probably be grossed out by it!”

Hajime moved his arm that was wrapped around Tooru’s front slightly and had, in fact, found a small tent there.

Tooru gasped. “Don’t do that!”

Hajime quickly retracted his arms and rolled to have his back facing Tooru. “Sorry!” He squeaked, hiding his head under the blanket. Was it weird to say that Hajime was _actually_ happy that Tooru got a boner just from a dream about Hajime? Was it weird to say he _really_ wanted to know the details to this dream?

“I don’t know what to do about it!” Tooru whined, face still hidden in his hands.

 _Well I could help you out or something—_ Oh my god, Hajime, shut up you literally just started dating.

Finally, Hajime sat up to look at Tooru. “I- I don’t know! Think gross thoughts!” Instinctively, Hajime tore Tooru’s hands away from his face and kissed him, Tooru quickly pulled back.

“You kissing me isn’t going to help! You’re not gross!”

“Pretend I’m someone else!”

“Hajime, no! I bet you’re just looking for an excuse to kiss me!”

Hajime pursed his lips.

“Oh my gosh, Hajime,” Tooru laughed. “Really?”

Hajime could feel his face heating up. “I mean… you could just wait until we’re in church, it’ll probably die down then unless you’re turned on by the bible or something…” He muttered.

Tooru hummed. “So what do you suppose we do until then?”

It was surprising, how quickly Tooru gave in. Not that Hajime was complaining.  

He decided to answer with his actions. With restored confidence, he leaned forward, eagerly fitting his lips onto Tooru’s. Tooru was anticipating this, he quickly latched on and situated himself. They kissed like that for a while, passionate. Without thinking, Hajime tried to slip his tongue into Tooru’s mouth.

Tooru pulled back and coughed. “ _What was that?”_ He wiped away at his mouth.

“So-sorry…” Hajime mumbled.

“No, no I liked it.” Tooru said nonchalantly as he leaned back in. This time he allowed Hajime to lick inside his mouth.

Tooru let out a soft moan, which sent a jolt to Hajime’s groin. This was bad, this was going to end badly, yet Hajime was carried away.

Hajime just barely pulled away, “Come here.” He whispered, pulling at Tooru’s waist. He complied surprisingly easy.

So there they were, Tooru straddling Hajime as they continued to make out, Hajime’s tongue going deeper and deeper into Tooru’s mouth.

They were both breathing heavily and Tooru let out more moans which wasn’t doing anything good for Hajime. He didn’t care at that point, though, nothing else mattered.

Hajime tore away from Tooru’s lips, beginning to kiss down his neck.

“Hajime,” Tooru gasped as he gripped onto Hajime’s shoulders.

Hajime began to suck and nip at the base of Tooru’s neck as Tooru let out small moans. Again, this wasn’t doing any good for the both of them in retrospect. They had no idea what time it was, someone could walk in on them at any moment, this could continue to go further, Hajime wasn’t sure if he wanted that. Maybe he would if they weren’t at a church camp. Who knows.

Hajime stuck a hand up Tooru’s shirt, he tensed considerably yet didn’t stop him, Hajime took it as the okay to continue. His hands roamed around Tooru’s torso, tracing over each rib indent, finding his way up to a nipple.

When he touched it was when Tooru let out his loudest moan yet.

 _Knock Knock._ “Time to get up, rise and shine!”

“Oh my gosh!” Tooru yelled. He scrambled off Hajime’s lap, quickly throwing himself to the opposite side of the bed. “Oh my gosh…” He rubbed his face.

“Yeah…”

“Oh my gosh.”

“Tooru—“

“We should probably get dressed.” He laughed awkwardly as he stepped off the bed, walking stiffly to his bag.

“Tooru—“

“What do you think I should wear today?” He pulled out a few shirts and started showing them off.

_“Tooru.”_

_“What?”_ He snapped.

“Why are you acting like that?”

“ _Why am I acting like this?_ Why am I acting like this, he asks. Are you kidding me?”

“They didn’t see anything, Tooru.”

“Hearing is a thing, you know! Not to mention I got carried away myself, gosh, I can’t believe I let you talk me into that.”

Hajime’s face dropped. All he could feel now was anger. He stood up from the bed, grabbed his pillow, and chucked it at Tooru, hitting him hard in the stomach. “You’re blaming me?” He took a few steps forward, his blood was boiling and over such a small reason too. Tooru had a right to freak out, Hajime didn’t know why he was so worked up.

Tooru stared angrily at Hajime. “Who else is there to blame?”

“You’re so fucking full of yourself.” Hajime just kept getting closer. “You’re the one who had the fucking erotic dream about me,” As he closed in he began to jab a finger at Tooru. “It’s not fucking unnatural, it’s what couples do.”

Tooru let out a staggered breath. “I know… I’m just a little paranoid, is all.”

Hajime sighed heavily, closing his eyes. “I get that, alright? Just know that the other guys solely came here so they could be with their boyfriends, I think we’re pretty safe.”

“Right…” Tooru stared at the ground. “I’m sorry.”

“No, nonono, don’t be sorry,” Hajime was standing right in front of Tooru. He took his hands in his own. “You’re scared, and that’s okay.”

Tooru nodded slowly, still staring at the ground. He took a step forward, closing the distance, and hugged Hajime, gripping the back of his shirt, holding on like his life depended on it.

They stayed like that, Hajime running a hand through Tooru’s hair soothingly, for a bit.

“Hey,” Tooru whispered into Hajime’s shoulder. “We should probably get going.”

After a second of silence, Hajime responded. “Right…” He kissed the side of Tooru’s head before pulling away.

-

-

“You guys seem happy,” Daichi stated upon the two sitting down at their table for breakfast. “Didn’t know someone could look that happy after church.”

“Yeah, well,” Tooru grinned, scooting his chair closer than needed. He was trying to be discreet but obliviously the others noticed as he gripped Hajime’s hand under the table.

-

-

The rest of the camp flew by, they played volleyball every day, learned more about their new friends, and most importantly, the two got to spend more time together as a couple.

Of course, their friends pointed it out in no time, and Tooru was a blushing mess saying that he was “being so careful” When in all honesty, you could probably tell even if you didn’t know them at all.

They were due to leave the next morning, Hajime could honestly say he didn’t want it to end. It meant no more sharing a bed with Tooru, no more being able to kiss and cuddle Tooru without worry, so many things that Hajime wasn’t ready to give up. But, all good things must come to an end.

The new group of friends sat in the unofficial hangout for one last time, chatting and not doing anything in particular.

Throughout this trip, Hajime had realized how great these new friends were. Kind of like the realization he came to with Bokuto and Kuroo. He was grateful. Especially now that Tooru and him were a thing, he couldn’t help but think the nine sitting before them played a role in getting the two dating. It’s funny, how friends you just met can become an important part in your life so quickly.

“Alright!” Koushi said loudly to quiet everyone. “Since it’s the last night I propose that everyone exchange numbers with Hajime and Tooru.” Tooru’s face dropped. Koushi’s smile left his face immediately and made his way to Tooru, kneeling down in front of him. “Is that not okay?”

Hajime took it upon himself to speak on behalf of his boyfriend. “Um, Tooru’s phone situation is kind of complicated,” He scratched at the back of his head, feeling awkward that he was the one who had to deliver this news. “I can… Take your numbers, though.”

“Oh,” Koushi stood uneasily. “Alright, that’s fine. Sorry if that made you uncomfortable.”

Tooru laughed, his composure already back. “It’s fine, you didn’t mean anything by it.”

After that, they all wrote their numbers on pieces of paper that they handed to Hajime. They promised each other that they’d hang out at some point, aside from youth group, and Hajime and Tooru decided to leave out the small detail that Tooru wasn’t allowed to go places.

-

-

Hajime and Tooru lay in the same bed that they had the entirety of the camp, snuggled up, trying to preserve the moment.

“I don’t want to leave…” Tooru mumbled into Hajime’s chest. He tightened his grip to pull him even closer than they already were.

“I don’t either.”

“I wish we could do this all the time.”

“Me too.”

“My parents are mean.”

Hajime rubbed up and down Tooru’s back, making soothing “shh” noises as he tried to comfort his boyfriend. “We’ll figure something out.”

“Thanks, Hajime.”

-

-

“YOU GUYS ARE A FUCKING THING?” Kuroo yelled upon Hajime delivering the play-by-play story of the camp.

“HE SAID THEY’RE A FUCKING THING.” Bokuto confirmed, grabbing Kuroo’s wrists. Hajime couldn’t say he hated the reaction, even if it was extremely embarrassing.

“I want to know literally everything,” Kuroo tore away from Bokuto’s grasp in favor of grabbing onto Hajime’s shoulders, staring him in the eyes. “Did you guys make out?”

“Did you guys have sex?” Bokuto was now at Hajime’s side, wiggling his eyebrows for effect.

“Fuck, no, jesus we were at a church camp, Tooru is an innocent angel who is not ready for that yet anyways.” Their reaction was a bit overwhelming to say in the least. “I mean, we almost did some things?”

“I said I wanted to know literally everything so that means literally everything, what are these some things you almost did?”

Hajime told them… Literally everything… even the minor details, which they seemed to want to know. He couldn’t say he minded revisiting the memories, in fact he welcomed it. Hajime was actually happy that someone wanted to hear about these things because frankly he was dying to talk about it.

“Hold on,” Bokuto wheezed from laughter. “So you’re telling me that the furthest you got was almost grinding at six in the morning? That’s so lame, man.” He curled over, slapping his knee.

“Shut up, we haven’t been dating for that long, unlike other people I know,” Heavily implying his two friends relationships. “I’m pretty content with those few days, I don’t know why you guys aren’t.”

“No, no we’re more than content,”Kuroo elbowed Bokuto in the stomach. “We didn’t even know if you’d work up the courage to tell him you liked him.”

“Technically, Tooru was the one who confessed first.”

“Just take the credit we’re giving you, Hajime.” Bokuto sighed.

“I really want to meet him, to be honest.” Kuroo said.

“And I’d love for you guys to meet him, but…”

“Have you ever thought about actually sneaking him out of his house, ya know instead of you always sneaking in and just spending time in his room?”

“Well, now that they’re officially dating they don’t just have to awkwardly cuddle while watching movies.” Kuroo grinned, poking at Hajime. “But yeah, it’d be cool if you could sneak him out at some point.”

Hajime bit his lip. “The thing is, where would I bring him? I mean there’s not much to do at one in the morning, especially when you’re not over 18.”

“Come hang out at my place,” Kuroo said. “I mean, Bokuto and Keiji could come over and I could invite Kozume, it’d be a fun time.”

“I’ll keep that in mind…”

-

-

That night Hajime was, surprise, at Tooru’s house. This time it was entirely different.

The moment Hajime was inside the window, Tooru was clinging to him, dragging Hajime into a kiss straight away. To put it simply: It was really fucking awesome.

They kissed for longer than Hajime expected, not that he was complaining. He had just expected Tooru to pull away and say something. Hajime wouldn’t mind if this were to happen every time they saw each other.

Finally, Hajime decided to pull away. “I take that as you missed me?” He grinned.

Tooru pressed a quick peck to Hajime’s lips before responding. “Of course I did.” Tooru’s cheeks were flushed. “What do you want to do?” He took a step back.

“Same stuff we always do, I don’t know. Did you want to do something?”

Tooru fidgeted, biting his lip. “I mean…”

Hajime laughed as he stepped towards Tooru, closing the distance that they previously had. “You could’ve just said so.” He said quietly, wrapping his arms around him to close the distance even further.

Hajime started to lean in as Tooru closed his eyes, within no time their lips were connected. Tooru was becoming more confident in his kissing skills and Hajime had to give it to him, he learned fast. Hajime was taken by surprise when Tooru started to bite down on his lower lip, he let out a gasp which allowed just enough time for Tooru to slip his tongue in, not that Hajime would’ve been opposed to it anyways. He tangled his tongue with Tooru’s as he attempted to explore Hajime’s mouth.

The kisses were becoming sloppy, the only noises that could be heard were the smack of lips, and wet pop of saliva as one would pull away for a mere second to take another breath. Their hands started to roam, Tooru placing one at the back of Hajime’s neck, feeling the short hair. Hajime put his hands up Tooru’s shirt and traced his hands up the sides of Tooru’s torso.

Tooru let out a soft moan, causing Hajime to shiver. He moved one of his hands to a nipple, rubbing at it. Tooru pulled his head away and moaned louder, Hajime opened his eyes and swore he had never seen such a beautiful sight. Hajime leaned in and started to mouth at Tooru’s jaw, sucking and nipping lightly. His mouth just kept moving across Tooru’s jawline, eventually getting to his ear which he took the lobe into his mouth, sucking on it.

The erotic sounds that Tooru kept making were doing things to Hajime. _I should probably stop before things go too far._ Said the voice in the back of his mind, but of course being caught up in the moment, he didn’t listen to it.

Hajime started to bite and kiss Tooru’s neck, probably too hard. _You’re going to end up leaving marks, this won’t do anything good for Tooru._ He wanted to tell his thoughts to fuck off even though he knew they were right. Would Tooru mind though? Would he be worried about his parents seeing it? Would he know how to cover them up if they were too dark? Would he be able to make some other excuse?

“Hajime…” Tooru whispered, breathlessly. “Hajime, we should stop.”

Hajime lingered his mouth on Tooru’s neck for a moment before pulling his head up. “Right, sorry.” He huffed out, looking at him. His face was red, lips parted as he breathed through his mouth. Hajime wanted to lean in and kiss him again.

“That,” Tooru took a deep breath. “That felt really nice.” He smiled, looking at Hajime. “You’re really good at that.”

“We should continue then, at some point.” Hajime responded, voice low, him out of breath as well.

They stood there, looking at each other. Hajime didn’t know what was supposed to come afterwards, are they supposed to watch movies? Play games? He was new at this whole couple thing.

“Hey,” Hajime broke the silence. “Remember when you said you were still counting on driving with me?”

“Yeah…”

“Want to go driving now?”

“Hajime, that’s risky!”

“Not too bad, I’ll take us to the closest parking lot…” He looked at his feet, biting his lip.

“Hajime—“

“We can make out in there.”

Tooru hesitated. “Deal…”

After the first time, they set out to go driving at least once a week, Hajime had even gotten to teaching Tooru to drive. The first couple times, Tooru was terrified to even step out the windows, but after a few weeks he was even the first one out. Hajime didn’t mind that part, he just missed having to bribe Tooru with some romantic result, not that it wasn’t implied.

He even got Tooru to agree going out to meet Kuroo and Bokuto. Of course, the two were ecstatic and Hajime was pretty sure they overwhelmed Tooru, but he actually did well. Accepting them and even joining in on their crazy antics as Hajime stood with Kozume and Keiji wondering how in the world they dealt with these boys.

All was going so well, they were still sitting together during church, sitting together during youth group (also with their friends they had made during the camp), just everything was perfect. Hajime wasn’t going over to Tooru’s every night, though, anymore. Which Tooru pouted at, at first but reluctantly accepted it as Hajime told him his school work was suffering from it and he needed to do well because it was senior year and grades right now were critical for college acceptation.

It surprised him, that his mother never realized he was leaving the house from midnight to four in the morning nearly every day. If she did, she never said anything, which made Hajime feel warm inside because if she did know then hey, she was starting to trust him again. Their relationship was vastly improving, even to the point where they could have friendly conversations during meals or on drives.

“Are you going to homecoming with anyone?” Was not a conversation topic he had been expecting. He had heard the announcements at school but never really paid any mind to it until that moment. His mother looked at him expectantly, waiting for his answer.

Hajime pursed his lips. “Uh, I don’t think I’m going…”

His mother frowned. “You can’t miss your senior homecoming, think of the fun memories you could make!”

He did want to go, he really wanted to go, but he would only go if he were able to take Tooru along with him. That was the only way, even Bokuto and Kuroo couldn’t fill his place. They’d have their own dates, anyways, he didn’t want to be the fifth wheel.

“I just… Don’t have anyone to go with…” He muttered.

Her frown deepened. “Well that’s okay, you could just go with friends or I could arrange something with the Kiyoko’s, you never did get into contact with their daughter. She’s such a nice girl too…”

“Mom,” He laughed into his words. “I’m not straight, I don’t want to go with her.”

“Fine, fine, don’t go.”

“That was the plan in the first place.”

When he told the same thing to his friends, they were disappointed at first but quickly recovered.

“You should have your own with Tooru, just like play some music and dance together. It’d be cute.” Kuroo suggested. Bokuto nodded in agreement.

“That’s… actually not a bad idea.”

-

-

And so, the night of homecoming approached. Hajime never bothered to tell Tooru, decided that he would surprise him and not make a big deal out of it.

The two sat on Tooru’s bed, cuddled against the head of the bed as they watched a movie.

About a half hour in, Hajime spoke up. “You know, tonight was my schools’ homecoming.”

Tooru turned his head to look at Hajime. “And you’re wasting your night here with me? You should have gone.” He frowned.

Hajime shrugged. “I didn’t think it’d be any fun without you… Anyways, Kuroo and Bokuto suggested that we just have our own… like, I don’t know it was sort of a stupid idea…” Hajime trailed off, feeling his cheeks start to heat up.

“That’s not stupid! I mean, it’s not like I’ve ever been to a homecoming, you could make my experience the best.”

“It’d be your only experience.” Hajime deadpanned.

Tooru grinned as he moved away from Hajime’s hold, grabbing his arm and pulling him up with him. “Exactly.” He winked. “Now play some music and come dance with me.”

Hajime grumbled but complied, taking out his phone and pressing the “shuffle” button for the playlist Bokuto and Kuroo had created at some point without his permission. He set his phone down as the first song began to play, it was a slow song but Hajime couldn’t remember the name of it.

“Hajime, do you know how to slow dance?” Tooru asked as he reached out for Hajime.

He walked forward and Tooru placed his arms around his neck, Hajime just feeling like it was right to place his hands by Tooru’s hips. “Not officially, but I can guess how.”

Tooru laughed as he began to sway back and forth, Hajime following suit. “Good thing no one’s here to watch us, then.”

Hajime huffed out a laugh, stepping a bit closer, leaving just a bit of distance between them.

“You’re nervous.” Tooru hummed. Hajime was staring at the ground but could sense the smile in Tooru’s voice.

“Am not…”

“Then look me in the eyes, Hajime.” He cooed. Hajime took a deep breath before raising up his head, but as soon as they met eyes, Hajime could just feel the redness of his face so apparent. He guessed that was what Tooru snickered at. “You’re so cute, Hajime.”

There it was again, every time Tooru wanted to make Hajime more flustered than usual he’d over-use his name. It worked, he’d give him that, not that Hajime appreciated it though. Hajime took deep breaths, trying to sooth the nervous feeling that was weighing down on his chest. He wasn’t sure why exactly he was so nervous, maybe that just made him even more nervous. Maybe it was the fact that Tooru was staring at him with such lust-filled eyes, the way he held onto him said so many things Hajime couldn’t decipher.

They swayed back and forth quietly, listening to the slow melody of the music. It filled the air but it didn’t take any of the tension out of it. It wasn’t bad tension, more of Hajime just didn’t know what to do. He felt like he should have been doing something other, like talking or who even knows.

“Hajime,” Tooru said after a while. “You don’t need to be so nervous.” He said quietly.

Hajime took a deep breath, looking up to meet Tooru’s eyes. “I know, I don’t know why I am.”

Tooru nodded as he bit his lip and looked at Hajime’s. “I see.” Then Tooru was leaning forward, fluttering his eyes shut and Hajime waited for impact.

Hajime kissed back right away, deepening it immediately. Whatever tension was in the air was now gone. It felt like a scene straight out of a romance novel, and previously Hajime saw it as cliché and stupid but now he welcomed it and found it… charming? He didn’t know how enjoyable, how happy it made him, until it actually happened. Now he couldn’t imagine his life without these events happening. This was how he wanted to spend the rest of his life.

Tooru bit Hajime’s lower lip, pulling it down slightly and sucking on it. Hajime gasped quietly as he gripped lower on Tooru’s hips, feeling his hip bones through his clothing. When Tooru stuck his tongue in, Hajime let him dominate easily. Something about having the warmth of Tooru’s tongue inside his mouth made him feel euphoric.

Their teeth clacked together and Hajime pulled away with a hiss. Tooru recovered quickly and moved to touch their foreheads together, they were so close that you could only focus on one eye, sharing air, warmth radiating off each other. Tooru’s eyes were glazed over, Hajime could only imagine what he looked like. He didn’t have time to think about it as Tooru leaned in again, joining their lips. Hajime started to step back, pulling Tooru along with him, until the back of his knees hit the bed and they both fell, Tooru basically pinning Hajime to the bed now. He lifted up his head to look at Hajime, the smile on his face could light up the entire world, Hajime tried to smile back but was positive it didn’t have the same effect.

Hajime grabbed Tooru by the collar of his shirt and pulled him down into another kiss, this time he slipped his tongue in first, letting Hajime explore his mouth before sucking on his tongue. Hajime let out a small moan and Tooru stiffened but quickly relaxed from it. They were messy and saliva was getting everywhere but none of them seemed to care, too caught up in the moment.

Tooru finally pulled away from Hajime and opted for kissing his jaw, working his way down to his neck where he bit down and sucked. Hajime was sure it was going to leave a mark but at that moment he saw it as a badge rather than a bruise to hide from the world. He wished he could leave marks like that on Tooru, if it wasn’t too risky he would. He’d be able to leave marks on other places but…

Hajime’s shirt was being raised up as Tooru stuck his hands underneath, hands sliding up his fairly muscular torso until he got to Hajime’s pecks. He stopped at a nipple and started to rub, playing with the skin in between his fingers. Hajime moaned loudly, unaware of the possibility of noise traveling. He wondered how someone who was as sheltered as Tooru was able to be so good at something like this, it wasn’t like he was able to watch porn. Hajime was pretty sure the first time they watched Fight Club together was the only time Tooru had seen anything even related to sex. He wasn’t complaining, but it made him a bit self-conscious, what if he wasn’t able to live up to Tooru’s expectations? Hajime guessed that Tooru being so good at this, that he’d think highly of Hajime’s capabilities even if he wasn’t so confident in them himself. Though, he wasn’t about to mention it to Tooru, just hoping if he did something unsatisfying that Tooru would tell him. He seemed like one of those honest people and from experience Hajime knew he was, but bedroom personalities and overall personalities are completely different.

Was he getting too ahead of himself? Was this really where this was leading to? Not that Hajime minded, he was just worried about Tooru. Did he feel obliged to do these things if Hajime didn’t say anything? Should he bring it up? These weren’t things he should’ve been thinking of, or maybe they were, he couldn’t make up his mind.

Hajime raised up his knee, fitting it between Tooru’s legs and lifting it and brushing over Tooru’s crotch area. He moaned, which went right to Hajime’s groin, it just encouraged him more. Tooru grinded against Hajime’s knee, creating much desired friction. The erotic noises that came out of Tooru’s mouth were beautiful and encouraging, like saying it was okay to do more.

Surprisingly, Tooru complied easily when Hajime flipped their positions, him now pinning Tooru to the bed. He moved his hand down to cup the small bulge starting to form in Tooru’s pants. He let out staggered breaths as Hajime began to palm him, but since it was through jeans it clearly wasn’t enough.

“Hajime, please…” Tooru whimpered. This was a side of him that Hajime would’ve liked to see more often, he looked beautiful, sounded beautiful, and Hajime did what he was asked to do. His hand found its way to the button of Tooru’s jeans, fiddling with it until the button was undone and slowly started to slide down the zipper.

The bulge was now way more apparent, forming a larger tent than before. Again, he began to palm him, Tooru moaned loudly.

“Tooru,” Hajime whispered. “You shouldn’t be so loud.”

“’s okay,” He said breathlessly. “They’re in the- in the basement.” With that, Tooru pulled Hajime into a kiss as he began to pry off Hajime’s shirt, he moved his hand away from Tooru’s erection to comply and Tooru basically whined. After Hajime didn’t put it back the moment his shirt was off, opting for moving to get Tooru’s own shirt off, Tooru rolled his hips up into nothing. “Put it back.” He commanded through staggered breaths.

Hajime decided he’d save the shirt for later, moving his hand back down except this time stopping at the waistband, tracing it until Tooru rolled his hips up again and Hajime finally dipped his hand under the fabric.

Carefully, he grasped the base of Tooru’s length. He had never done this to anyone but himself, what if he was too rough? Not fast enough? His thoughts were drowned out when he heard Tooru, letting out long moans as Hajime began to move his hand.

“Hajime—“ Tooru huffed out, the tone going straight to Hajime’s groin. He pulled Hajime down for a kiss, his staggered breaths causing them to part frequently. Finally, Hajime parted entirely moving to the base of Tooru’s neck, kissing it lightly, and then licking a straight line up to his ear. He took Tooru’s lobe between his teeth right as he pressed his thumb to the head of Tooru’s dick.

He gasped, which turned into a moan, and rolled his hips into Hajime’s hand, matching the rhythm. “Faster,” He whined.

Hajime grinned as he pulled his mouth from Tooru’s ear to directly whisper, “Say that again, I didn’t hear you.” His grin grew into a smirk as Tooru shuddered.

He let out a deep, uneasy breath and swallowed hard. “Move your hand faster.” He said a bit louder.

Hajime hummed, Tooru shuddered. “Magic word?”

“Please!” Tooru pleaded as he thrust his hips up, trying to quicken the pace himself. “Please, go faster.”

Hajime nodded as he began to stroke Tooru faster as wanton noises came from the other.

“Hajime, Hajime, I’m close.” Tooru stated. That just encouraged Hajime to move faster, lick harder, all until Tooru’s legs were twitching and he was coming into Hajime’s hand with his name on his lips.

He was breathing hard as he reached over to his nightstand to grab tissues, handing one to Hajime.

Hajime took the Tissue and wiped his hand. He looked over to find Tooru staring at him with glazed over eyes. “Want me to do you?”

Hajime shook his head. “That’s okay.” He stood to throw the tissue in the trashcan, painfully aware of his boner that had gone untouched.

“You sure?”

He did want Tooru to do something about it. But there were thoughts in Hajime’s head telling him it’d take away Tooru’s innocence or something. _You just made out and gave the guy a handjob._ He debated with himself. He knew, but Hajime felt like if Tooru were to do that he would somehow give that vibe to his parents. Tooru used to be the overly cautious one but now it was Hajime.

Hajime nodded. “Can I use your bathroom?”

“Yeah…” Tooru answered skeptically.

Hajime stepped into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. He stood with hands on the edge of the sink, looking at himself in the mirror contemplating on what he should do. There was this sudden surge of anxiety hitting Hajime like a ton of bricks, all of these thoughts about if Tooru’s parents _did_ find out. What would they do? What would happen to Tooru? What would happen to their relationship?

Sighing, Hajime turned on the sink to splash cold water on his face. His erection wasn’t completely gone but it was lessening. It still would have felt nice to get off but there would be other times, right? This was just the first. Maybe when they had done things a few times and they were both more comfortable. Hajime was including Tooru in these even though he knew he had become so much more comfortable than he had in the past, Hajime just did it to reassure himself that they’re in this together.

After a few minutes of deep breaths and gross thoughts and splashes of water Hajime decided it was time to go back, he had been in there long enough.

He walked in to find Tooru casually lounging on his bed, reading a book, any traces of what they had done, gone. His appearance didn’t even give off a hint of it, unlike Hajime.

Tooru smiled, looking up from his book. “Took you long enough.”

Hajime laughed unconvincingly as he walked over and sat on the edge of Tooru’s bed. “I should probably get going…” He pursed his lips.

Tooru frowned. “Why now?”

“Because it’s getting late.”

“Please stay.”

“Like, over night?”

“Yeah.”

Hajime furrowed his brows, confused. “But Tooru, I can’t do that. We have church tomorrow and what if your parents walk in?”

Tooru sighed, closing his book and setting it on his nightstand. “Can you just wake up early and leave? I miss being able to cuddle with you as I fell asleep…”

There it was, the guilt trip. Even though Hajime recognized what he was trying to do it didn’t stop him from giving in. The weak spot he had for Tooru really hit him hard sometimes. “Fine…”

Immediately, Tooru’s expression brightened. He stood up from his bed and walked over to his dresser. He grabbed two pairs of shorts. “Do you want to borrow something to sleep in?”

“Sure…”

Tooru threw him one of the pairs of shorts and a t-shirt.

“Oh my god, you’re such a nerd.” Hajime laughed as he held up the shirt, tie-dyed with an alien in the middle. It was so Tooru, everything about it screamed ‘Tooru’, Hajime was surprised he hadn’t seen him in it before.

A blush appeared on Tooru’s face, which he hid behind his own clothes. “Don’t make fun of it, it’s an old shirt…”

Hajime stood and stepped over to Tooru. “I bet you still love it, though.” He smirked. It was obvious the shirt wasn’t old, it was still in good condition and way too big to be for anyone younger.

“Shut up…” His blush grew as he turned away. “Just get changed…”

A few teases and two boys changed later, they were laying together in Tooru’s bed. The clothes were a bit tight but Hajime couldn’t say he disliked it. They smelled like Tooru.

Tooru lay with his head on Hajime’s chest, arms wrapped around him, the same position they had spent the majority of the nights back at camp. It felt nice doing it again, nothing intimate, just two boyfriends being together in a comfortable silence, just enjoying each other’s presence.

“I still can’t believe you missed your senior homecoming because of me.” Tooru said quietly after a while.

Hajime hummed. “Well it’s over now.” He looked down, just able to see the top of Tooru’s head. “Maybe you can make it up by coming to prom with me.”

Tooru unwrapped his arms from Hajime to turn and look at him wide eyed. “For real?” He asked.

“For real.” Hajime confirmed with a grin.

“If we can work something out that’d be so awesome oh my gosh I can’t wait!”

Tooru’s reaction reminded him of how the high schoolers in little kid shows did, it made him smile even more. “Me either.”

With that, Tooru pecked Hajime lightly before settling back to his former position. The two fell asleep like that, warm, content, together.

-

-

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?” A woman’s voice screamed, waking Hajime up.

He sat up suddenly, looking to where the noise came from and…

“MORE IMPORTANTLY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SON’S BED?”

“Mrs. Oikawa—“

“Mom—“ The two spoke at the same time.

She didn’t care though, she marched into the room, furious, grabbing Hajime by the arm and yanking him out of the bed away from Tooru. “I _KNEW_ IT.”

“Mom, stop!” Tooru yelled.

All Hajime could hear was his heartbeat, he felt like his vision was blurring, all of this was wrong.

“Be quiet, Tooru.” She commanded.

“Mrs. Oikawa, I can explain—“ Hajime tried to say calmly.

“Save it. I _knew_ I shouldn’t have trusted you! Corrupting my son, what awful things have you done to him?”

“HE HASN’T DONE ANYTHING BAD TO ME, MOM!” Tooru yelled.

“HE WAS _SLEEPING_. IN _YOUR_ BED.”

“YEAH? AND BECAUSE OF THAT I’M HAPPY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY FUCKING LIFE.”

She gasped as the grip on Hajime’s arm tightened. She stared Hajime right in the eye. “So you’ve turned my son into a fag but also made him sin with that awful language?! I can’t believe your mother kept you, I don’t understand how she can live with such _scum_ —“ A pillow hit her face and Tooru was now standing, livid. Hajime had never seen him look so angry.

“DON’T YOU _DARE_ CALL HAJIME SCUM.” He stormed over, taking hold of his mother’s hand on Hajime’s arm. “Get off of him, don’t you dare touch him.”

“Tooru—“

“Hajime, be quiet.” He snarled. “Aren’t _you_ the one sinning?” Tooru looked directly at his mother. “Depriving me of my happiness? Taking me away from the world? I didn’t notice it before but the moment I started hanging out with Hajime I realized how much you and dad treat me like _shit_.”

“We do it because we love you, Tooru! We don’t want you to make the wrong choices—“

“Oh really?” Tooru laughed dryly. “You don’t want me to make the wrong choices? What about _you_? You think depriving me of friends and the real world is _right_? Who the hell gave you that idea? I have no room to make wrong decisions because _both of you have already made them for me_!”

Footsteps came stomping up the stairs. “HEY! DON’T YOU DARE TALK TO YOUR MOTHER THAT WAY!” Hajime jumped, he had never so much as heard a few words from Tooru’s father.

“Fuck you!”

He grabbed Hajime from his wife, taking him by both arms and practically dragging him towards the steps. “You’ve corrupted my son, you just ruined my family. You have caused Tooru to bring shame to the Oikawa name.” He yelled as he pulled Hajime down the steps.

Hajime planted his feet. “You’re wrong.” He said calmly.

Mr. Oikawa glared at him. “ _What?_ ”

“Dating me isn’t a problem, there’s no “sin” in loving another man. The only sin within that are the dumbass parents who think homosexuality is a sin, causing their children to live in fear and you teach them that that’s how they need to live their life. You cause them to live in secret, you pick a god-damned book over your own child and you don’t see the wrong in that? I don’t know what made you so delusional as to believe that but with all due respect, Mr. Oikawa, that is the dumbest thing I have ever heard in my fucking life.”

They all stared at Hajime in silence, even Tooru looked at him in disbelief.

So he continued. “If you loved Tooru at all you’d let him do what he wants, you’d let him be happy and frankly he’s happy with me. I don’t care if you like me, I’m not asking for that, I’m asking for you to stop thinking about yourselves, stop thinking about a god-damned religion that is over 1,000 years old that we don’t even know is true, stop thinking about your social status, and actually love your fucking child.”

Hajime could sense the rage building in Tooru’s parents. Mr. Oikawa’s face was starting to go red as his hands shook and he continued to pull Hajime down the steps. He yanked him so hard that Hajime tripped and fell the last few.

“Hajime!” Tooru yelled, trying to get around his mother, but she held him back with as much force as she could muster.

“You come into my house, you corrupt my son, and you have the audacity to insult our parenting style? I could have you arrested right now for breaking and entering. Don’t push your luck.” As he continued to drag Hajime they neared the front door. He couldn’t leave, not yet, he needed to protect Tooru.

Tooru had started to cry as he called for Hajime again, it was too soon to end, it couldn’t end here. “I didn’t “insult your parenting style”, I called you out on your bullshit!” He attempted to yank away from Mr. Oikawa but he was stronger than he looked. His grasp tightened anymore and Hajime swore he could feel his bones beginning to crack.

They finally arrived at the front door and Mr. Oikawa swung it open, tossing Hajime out. Hajime stumbled and fell to his knees. “If you ever so much as touch my son again you will regret ever being born.” And then the door was slammed in Hajime’s face.

He spent a few minutes trying to kick the door open, trying to throw himself at it. Hajime could only imagine what was going on inside, all he could hear was muffled yelling.

Out of breath and energy, Hajime stumbled away from the door and onto the front lawn. He looked up to Tooru’s window which was now opened, his mother standing there with the backpack he usually brought. “AND TAKE YOUR TRASH WITH YOU!” She yelled as she threw the bag out of the window. It was open, all of the contents fell out as it free fell to the ground, his laptop hitting the ground with a sickening sound.

The last thing he heard was Tooru screaming for Hajime, Hajime wasn’t able to do anything.

She slammed the window shut and Hajime sat there on his knees, staring up at the window that had once been the door to his happiness but now was the ending of the thing he considered to be the best thing that ever happened to him.

Hajime couldn’t tell how much time he had been sitting out there, all concepts of time had disappeared from his brain. His mind was totally blank, nothing, absolutely nothing would come to mind.

It could have been hours, it could have been seconds by the time he actually gathered up the strength to stand. He only bothered to grab the keys from his backpack, leaving the remains in their yard. His phone was still up in Tooru’s room, they had probably destroyed it by now. Now, every single picture he had taken with and of Tooru gone.

He stumbled to his car, everything numb. It was probably a safety hazard to be driving like this but Hajime just didn’t care. He couldn’t find himself to care about anything other than the safety of Tooru.

-

-

Hajime couldn’t explain why. Maybe he could, he just didn’t want to admit it.

But there he was, in front of Tetsurou Kuroo’s house. His body moved on his own and he was at the front door, knocking. Why would Kuroo be up at eight in the morning? He lived on his own most of the time because his parents were always on business trips. Even with that, there was the possibility of him being over at Kozume’s.

Though, Hajime decided he had nothing to lose anyways. So, he knocked.

And knocked again.

And again.

He just kept knocking until he heard a “Coming! Jesus, calm down!” From the other side.

Hajime leaned his head on the door as Kuroo turned the knob.

“What do you want- Oh my god, Hajime, what happened?” He caught Hajime as he fell into the house.

Hajime took a staggered breath. “He-“ He sniffled and before he knew it he was crying. Hajime hiccupped. “He- and it’s- it’s all my fault.”

“Woah, dude!” Kuroo quickly lead Hajime in, setting him on the couch. “I’m gonna get you some water…” He muttered as he walked out of the room, looking back at Hajime with confusion written all over his face.

He sat there, staring at the ground as tears streamed down his face.

When Kuroo came back he set the glass on the coffee table in front of them and sat next to Hajime, wrapping his arm around him. “Hajime, what happened?” He asked quietly.

Words wouldn’t come out of Hajime’s mouth, only strangled sounds and sobs. They just sat there for a bit, silence, only sounds coming from Hajime. Kuroo rubbed his shoulder before parting and leaning forward to grab the glass of water he had gotten. He handed the cup to Hajime, who took it and drank it slowly.

Kuroo took out his phone and pressed the call button for someone. “Hey, Bo,” He said quietly. “-Yes I know it’s early. –Yes I have a good reason for calling. –Something happened with Hajime, I’m not exactly sure what but I think it has to do with Tooru, I need you to come over. –Okay, see you in a bit. Bye.” He hung up the phone and looked at Hajime. “Bokuto will be over soon.”

Hajime nodded as he set the glass back on the coffee table, Kuroo deciding to go get more.

Until Bokuto arrived, Kuroo didn’t bother to ask any more questions than if he needs anything. Soon enough, Bokuto was letting himself into Kuroo’s house, asking all the questions Kuroo hadn’t.

“Hajime!” He said, loudly, rushing to his side. “Hajime, what happened? Do I need to go rough him up? If he broke your heart I will pound him so hard he wouldn’t even know what-“

Hajime’s broken sobs told Bokuto to stop. He pursed his lips and waited for Hajime to settle down some.

“Tell us what happened?” Kuroo asked quietly.

Hajime swallowed loudly before looking up and rubbing at his eyes. “Last night, I went over to Tooru’s and we did things and after we finished he asked me to sleep over and just wake up early to leave but I guess I didn’t wake up in time and his mom walked in on us and his parents called him a disgrace and basically told me to fuck off and-“ Hajime explained quickly, stopping to take a breath. “And I don’t know what’s going to happen because they were pretty fucking pissed and…” Hajime broke down again.

Bokuto placed himself next to Hajime, hugging him, Kuroo doing the same.

“Oh, Hajime…” Bokuto muttered.

They both didn’t know what to do, Hajime could sense it. Because really, what was there to do? This was one of those situations where doing anything would probably make it worse. It wasn’t like Hajime could go back there, if he did Tooru’s parents would probably beat him or call the cops. He had a feeling that they’d be putting Tooru on lockdown or something, just to get him away from the room that he and Hajime had been.

Hajime sniffled, lifting up his head. “I don’t know what to do…”

Kuroo and Bokuto looked at each other, hesitating to say anything.

“I’d be lying if I said I knew what to do,” Kuroo finally said. “But… God, there isn’t even any “but”, I’m totally stumped…”

“You have their home phone number, right?” Bokuto asked.

Hajime shook his head. “I did, but I left my phone there so it’s probably gone now…”

“Maybe this is one of those times where it’ll get better after a little while… They’re furious now, but maybe Tooru’s parents will settle down a bit in a few days?” Kuroo suggested.

Hajime sighed. “I doubt it… But right now it seems like the only option…” He stood. “Anyways, I should probably go, my mom’s going to be furious and is probably pissed I didn’t pick up my phone and she’s just going to be so pissed oh god.” Hajime let out a quiet sob as he began to walk to the front door.

“Hajime… Do you want us to go with you?” Bokuto asked.

He hesitated, but nodded in the end. They told Hajime he shouldn’t drive and that’s how he ended up lying in the back of his own car as Kuroo drove to his house with Bokuto in the passenger seat.

-

-

Hajime’s hands shook as he brought his keys to the knob of the front door. “Guys, what am I going to tell her?” He asked, suddenly panicked. “She never knew about me and Tooru.”

“Well,” Kuroo said. “There’s not much more damage that can be done, might as well tell her. Anyways, she might be able to do something, mom’s usually know what to do and since they’re actually adults they have more authority.”

Nodding, Hajime took a deep breath and pressed the key into the lock, slowly turning it and pressing in.

As soon as he opened the door his mother started talking.

“Hajime Iwaizumi you had better have a good excuse for not being here!” She said furiously. “I have called you, texted you, so many times where have you—“

He walked into the kitchen where she was sitting. With his lip quivering he tried to look up at her but failed, dropping his head again.

“Oh honey…” Her voice was calmer as she stood from her seat walking over to Hajime, taking him around the shoulder and leading him to the living room to sit with him on the couch. She let him lean on her shoulder as Bokuto and Kuroo awkwardly followed. She looked up at them, concerned. “What happened?”

Kuroo scratched his chin. “Well… You know his friend Tooru?”

She nodded slowly, trying to put pieces together.

“Um, well, they’re… more than friends-” Bokuto continued.

“ _Were_ more than friends.”

“So…”

“Oh, I see,” She said as she rubbed Hajime’s shoulder. “Just going through a break up?”

“It’s a bit more complicated than that, Ms. Iwaizumi,” Kuroo shifted. “It wasn’t their choice, see, Tooru’s parents walked in on them… Sleeping together in the same bed? Is that right, Hajime?” Hajime nodded slowly. “So, his parents weren’t too happy about that…”

“Of course they weren’t, the Oikawa’s are known for that kind of discrimination.” She sighed. “Oh, Hajime, you really got yourself into a situation didn’t you? Why were you over at their house?”

Hajime swallowed. “I, uh, have been going over there practically every night for the past few months…”

She narrowed her eyes. “We’ll discuss this part after we get everything else sorted out.” His mother turned to look at Hajime’s two friends. “You guys can leave, thank you for bringing him home.”

“Funny story,” Bokuto laughed stiffly. “We all drove here in Hajime’s car so…”

She pinched the bridge of her nose. “Right, right of course. Okay, I’ll drive you two home in a bit. Have you eaten?”

They both shook their head and then Hajime’s mother set to making a meal for the four of them, probably just using that as an excuse to have quiet time to think about her fuck up of a son.

-

-

Hajime refused to go to the school for the next few days, spending his time lying in bed, waiting for updates. Sadly, the only update he ever received was that no one would answer the phone in the Oikawa household.

His mother bought him a new phone, but it didn’t improve his mood because he didn’t have those pictures anymore, he should’ve sent them to Bokuto when he asked. Now Hajime was beating himself up because of his stubbornness.

“I need to go to youth group…” Hajime said to his mother Wednesday night.

She pursed her lips. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

“I need to know if he’s there.”

After arguing his mother reluctantly gave in and drove him to the church.

Before he got out of the car she looked at him directly. “I’m going to wait right here, if it gets overwhelming I want you to come out, okay?”

Hajime nodded slowly, opening the door and walking into the church.

His heart beat was too fast, his head hurt, he felt like he was holding the world on his shoulders, all because he needed to know if Tooru was there or not. Hajime was more doubtful than hopeful but…

He turned the corner into the room.

Tooru wasn’t there.

He walked out.

Daichi came running after him. “Hajime-“

“Leave me alone, please.” He huffed out, his voice cracking.

“Where’s Tooru?-“

“I SAID LEAVE ME ALONE.” Hajime yelled, breaking into a sprint towards the exit of the church. He had probably destroyed that friendship. Daichi would go back and tell the others about how awful of a human being Hajime is, then he’d lose those friends too. Slowly, his ties to that church he had worked so hard to create were being destroyed, and it was all his fault.

-

-

The Oikawa’s weren’t at the usual mass that Sunday.

Or the Sunday after that.

Or the Sunday after that.

-

-

“Kuroo,” Hajime said as the three friends plus Kozume and Keiji sat together in Kuroo’s basement, watching movies. He was fifth wheeling, but at this point what was there to care about? “Will you take me to Tooru’s house?” He asked quietly.

All of them stopped what they were doing, staring at Hajime with the only noise coming from the television.

“Please.”

“Hajime, what’s the point in that?” Kuroo asked, untangling himself from Kozume.

“I just,” Hajime took a deep breath, looking away from his friends. “I need to see something that ties to him.”

“Are you sure his house is the best place to go for that? What if his parents see you or something?” Bokuto asked.

Hajime showed a broken smile. “What else do I have to lose?”

Once again, silence filled the room. Except this time Kuroo stood. “Okay.” He agreed quietly. “Can the others come?”

Hajime nodded slightly, heading up the stairs.

Hajime’s hands shook as they drove to Tooru’s house. From Kuroo’s it was a ten minute drive, with each minute more anxiety built up, more scenarios of what would happen.

He stopped where the circle for the court started and Hajime let himself out of the car. Slowly, he took steps towards the house. There was a sign in their yard but he couldn’t read what it said from the darkness. All he could tell was that Tooru’s lights weren’t on anymore.

Hajime turned back to the car. “Kuroo! Turn on your headlights!” He shouted. He was looking down when it happened and Hajime found his phone at his feet, screen cracked, probably didn’t even work anymore.

Taking a deep breath he looked up to read the sign. His ears started ringing, all breath knocked out of him, vision blurring as tears surfaced. With his legs limp, Hajime fell to his knees.

[ _FOR SALE_ ]

-

-

That same night, Hajime sat on the other side of the couch with his knees pulled up to his chest. He could feel the tension in the air and eyes frequently on him, but none of his friends said anything. They spent the night with a movie marathon on some channel Hajime didn’t care to ask about. He wasn’t really paying attention anyways, even though he was staring at the screen.

Eventually, the movie Dear, John came on. About ten minutes in, Kuroo changed the channel. Hajime looked at him.

“We don’t need to be watching that…”

Hajime opened his mouth to say something but couldn’t correlate a sentence. A few minutes later they were watching some other movie on some other channel.

Hajime stood up. “I should probably get going…” He muttered, walking to the steps.

“Alright, I’ll drive you home.” Kuroo stated cautiously.

“I think I’m gonna walk…”

“Hajime it’s three in the morning, you can’t do that.”

“I’ll be fine! Stop worrying about me so much, I don’t care!” He snapped, running up the stairs, sprinting to the door, closing it immediately after him.

From there he sprinted out of Kuroo’s neighborhood, making it onto the main road. He still didn’t stop running as he made turn after turn barely paying attention to where he was going.

Ten minutes later Hajime was looking around the abandoned roads illuminated by street lights. He didn’t recognize any of the streets.

“Good going, Hajime.” He said to himself, trying to catch his breath. Hajime patted his pockets and pulled out his phone… but it was his old phone… he must have left his current one at Kuroo’s. “Shit…”

Looking around himself, he spotted at 24 hour CVS and decided to make his way there, maybe ask for directions.

A bell rang upon him walking in the doors. The employee looked up from a magazine with a tired stare, immediately going back to what they were doing.

Hajime decided to actually buy something so he’d have more of an excuse to talk to the employee.

He wandered around the store when he came to the office supplies aisle where he saw a notebook.

On impulse he grabbed it along with a pen and headed to the checkout.

As he walked out of the store he had his directions and his new belongings.

What’s a few more minutes? He told himself as he sat on the bench outside the store.

Hajime took out the notebook and pen from the bag, taking the pen out of the package and opening up to a fresh page.

 _12/15/14_  
_Dear Tooru,  
_ _Today I went to your house, I found a “For Sale” sign in the yard. I actually cried. Pathetic, right? You’re such an asshole for doing that, leaving me, making me cry. I miss     you. I’m pretty sure I ruined my friendship with the guys from youth group, I yelled at Daichi when he tried to figure out what happened and I haven’t been there or to church since you left. I went back to Kuroo’s after the whole your house thing and we watched movies and Dear John came on, which is where I got this idea, not that you’re ever going to get these. I can’t imagine my life without you but I’m pretty sure you’re never coming into it again so. Tooru Oikawa, thank you for being a part of a period of my life._

_—Hajime_

-

-

 _12/17/14_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_Today was my last day of finals before winter break. If you were still here we would have been able to spend it together but I’m probably going to end up spending it with Kuroo and Bokuto and/or playing volleyball. I never really noticed how much my sleeping pattern affected me when I would visit you daily, but I’ve had so much more energy lately. Not that I regret going to your house, but it’s nice to be able to play volleyball without wanting to die after every practice. Anyways, I hope you’re doing fine wherever you are, I love you._  
_—Hajime_

-

-

 _1/1/15_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_It would have been nice to have you as my new year’s kiss, it would’ve been my first one and undoubtedly yours. It would’ve been something nice to share. I spend it with Kuroo, Bokuto, Kozume, and Keiji though, it wasn’t bad but it was awkward being the only one there without someone. So instead of waiting to kiss you at midnight I decided to start writing this and Kuroo and Bokuto made fun of me for it. Keiji said it was cute and then Bokuto was all “I take it back!” Anyways, they say hi and hope you’re doing well and that they miss you._  
_— Hajime_

-

-

 _2/14/15_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_It’s Valentine’s Day and again, I am left alone. I didn’t spend today with the others though, for obvious reasons. Would’ve been nice if we could’ve done that too. I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t thought about you in that way haha, but honestly I feel really guilty after it because all I can remember is what happened the next morning when we did that. I started going to youth group again. It’s not the same without you but it’s something to do since volleyball season ended. I introduced Bokuto, Kuroo, Keiji, and Kozume to the others and basically all went to hell. Bokuto and Kuroo have this weird fascination with Kei, it’s kinda funny. They take his glasses a lot but the first time they took them Bokuto put them on and basically went blind, they don’t put Kei’s glasses on anymore. Shouyo took a liking to Kozume, it’s weird because Shouyo’s this ball of energy while Kozume’s calm and collected. Guess it’s sorta like Kuroo and his relationship, I don’t know. Keiji and I just sort of standoff to the side and watch them be idiots. It’s pretty entertaining. I think you’d join in on it, seems like your kind of thing._  
_—Hajime_

-

-

 _2/28/15_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_It’s almost been three months since you left, it’s weird to think that’s about the amount of time we spent together, it felt like so much longer. Honestly, it was like we’ve known each other our entire lives. I was in a funk because I was thinking about it so Kuroo bought me ice cream. It helped for a bit but when I got home I just got sad again. I miss you so much._  
_— Hajime_  
_P.S. I hope you’re doing fine wherever you are, I love you._

-

-

 _4/4/15_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_It’s almost Easter. My mom convinced me to go to church with her, it was the first time since you left. I don’t know if you would have been there since it was Saturday, but I sat with Daichi and Koushi. After it was over we ended up finding a few of the others and hung out, I honestly ate so much chocolate I think I’m going to explode. You would’ve had fun. You probably would’ve made fun of me too._  
_—Hajime_

-

-

 _5/1/15_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_I’ve written you nearly 30 letters and it still doesn’t feel like enough, even though you’ll never get them anyways. I wonder if you think of me as much as I think about you._  
_— Hajime_

-

-

 _5/10/15_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_My mom finally got me to go on a date with Shimizu Kiyoko. After, like, seven months. She was nice and I think you would have liked her but she wouldn’t have liked you. I found out that she has a girlfriend named Hitoka, and that she only agreed because her dad was pressuring her as well. We talked about you._  
_— Hajime_

-

-

 _5/20/15_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_I graduate in nine days and I’m so fucking terrified. I got accepted into a college with a volleyball scholarship, Bokuto and Kuroo got into the same one._  
_Oh, also, tonight was prom and I ended up going with Hitoka. It was a good idea, because she’s a sophomore so she wouldn’t be allowed to come alone and same sex couples can’t register together so Shimizu and I worked it out. It was actually pretty fun. We’ve been hanging out recently and I think our parents think we’re dating. Actually, we decided to try and get our parents together because well, it’s been a while since my mom dated anyone and I think she deserves it._  
_— Hajime_

 _Dear Tooru,_  
_I’m writing this a few hours later but Shimizu and I were like “we have important news” and our parents were like “!!!” and they thought we were going to announce something about dating but then we said that we set up a dinner for them and long story short, they’re going on a date tomorrow._  
_— Hajime_

-

-

 _5/29/15_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_Well, I’m officially a high school graduate. That means only a few more days until I’m officially an adult. I think I’m going to get a tattoo or something on my birthday, we’ll find out. If I do I wish you could be there so I can hold your hand and be a wimp because needles are scary._  
_Oh, and update on my mom. The date went well and they’re going on another one soon._  
_— Hajime_

-

-

 _6/10/15_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_Well, guess who’s 18? I told everyone I didn’t want a party but when I got home from my summer job (host at some restaurant that’s totally not up to your standards), everyone was there and I’d be lying if it said I wasn’t surprised (it was a surprise party after all.). I decided I’m going to get my ears pierced so I can put plugs in later, you’d probably hate them but I’d just laugh and say deal with it. I’m going to do it tomorrow, wish me luck. Hope you had a nice day._  
_— Hajime_

-

-

 _7/20/15_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_Happy birthday, congrats on becoming an adult. Wish I could’ve been there to say it myself. I love you._  
_— Hajime_

-

-

 _8/30/15_  
_Dear Tooru,_  
_My first semester of college starts next week… Today Kuroo, Bokuto, and I are driving there, it’s a five hour drive and we decided to carpool in Kuroo’s car. We’re taking turns driving, I took first, Kuroo took second, and now Bokuto’s driving and I have never driven with him before and now I know why._  
_— Hajime_  
_P.S. Help_

 _Dear Tooru,_  
_I’m writing this on the same day, we’re almost there and it’s Kuroo’s turn to drive again, thank god. Anyways, Kuroo and Bokuto got to room together while I’m stuck with some guy named Ushijima, I guess he sounds okay though, probably could be worse. Haha… ha.. save me_  
_— Hajime_

_Dear Tooru,  
We just arrived and now are waiting in the check in line. Bokuto and Kuroo are arguing about something, I’m not sure what but it’s pretty funny to watch, they’re so stu_

“Next!” The advisor called. Hajime stopped writing and walked to the desk and gave his name and ID. “Oh, Hajime, last minute room change, you’re to room with someone named Tooru Oikawa, is that okay?”

His heart stopped. Had Hajime heard correctly? He must have, Kuroo and Bokuto stopped fighting behind him because of it.

“Hello?” They waved their hand in his face.

“Are they here yet?” Hajime asked calmly, but he definitely wasn’t calm on the inside.

They flipped through the papers on their clipboard. “Yeah, checked in about two hours ago.”

Hajime couldn’t stop himself from grinning as the person handed over the key. “Thank you so much.” He shook their hand enthusiastically which they stared at him strangely for. He started to run off but turned to look at Bokuto and Kuroo. “I’m gonna-“

“GO!” They both yelled in unison, smiled plastered across their faces. “We’ll catch up with you later!” Kuroo yelled as Hajime dashed off.

He ran faster than he had in his life, well for someone carrying bags. Hajime was pretty sure he knocked a few people over but he didn’t stop to apologize. He dashed up the stairs, deeming that it would take too long to wait for an elevator.

Floor 2, room 6. He was feet away.

The door was already open when Hajime got there, looking in there he was.

There he was.

This was really happening. He dropped all of his belongings and Tooru looked up and locked eyes with Hajime, his lips started to quiver as he opened up his arms and Hajime took his cue to run in and hug him.

Hajime picked him up and spun him around, after setting Tooru down they leaned back to meet eyes. They kissed. They kissed and time stopped and all that mattered was their lips on each other’s, salty taste of tears that had to be coming from Tooru joined in with the desperate kisses but then Hajime realized he was crying too.

They pulled away and Tooru clung onto Hajime with so much force it knocked him onto the bed. He hid his face in the crook of Hajime’s neck and with a muffled voice said,

“I missed you so much.”

**Author's Note:**

> So... that took forever. I was supposed to finish this at the end of January but obviously that didn't happen lmao. My goal was to finish it before (manga spoiler) aoba josai lost but
> 
> Anyways, this is based on events that have happened in my life, not all necessarily to me but to friends, i basically played Kuroo and Bokuto's part lmfao
> 
> Please note that i haven't been to youth group since i was in 7th grade, idk if this is how they do it with the high schoolers lmao. aaaaaaaaaaannnnnd that i know nothing about handjobs :V  
> Also, Oikawa's parents are based off of this crazy theology teacher at my school who literally thinks driving is a sin.
> 
> Hopefully you enjoyed, I enjoyed the three months it took me to write this and honestly i cried when i finished.
> 
> if you have any questions you can always message me on my [tumblr](http://hqhaikyuu.tumblr.com) or simply in the comments
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated, thank you for reading!! :)
> 
> EDIT (3/25/17): i have decided that i WILL NOT be making a continuation because I simply do not have the motivation to do so, however I did have it planned out and I was asked about it so [if you are curious as to what was supposed to happen, it is here](http://hqhaikyuu.tumblr.com/post/158365359783/hello-to-an-amazing-writer-i-realize-youre-super)


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